I ended it. Need to rant and could use some support.

[Miss_Bee]

He just pulled out of the driveway. I never left when he got here. I had no idea that he was coming so early. The girls were waiting to be picked up so i couldn't just get up and go. Yesterday when he said he was coming, I asked him to come early. He said he'd come when he'd come. He wasn't going to cater to me. Apparently he did.

 

All his stuff still isn't out. He didn't have room. ****.

 

He asked me what he did to me. I told him he treated me like a dog. He said that one day i'd see!

 

I wish i was still angry.

[Touche]

He just pulled out of the driveway. I never left when he got here. I had no idea that he was coming so early. The girls were waiting to be picked up so i couldn't just get up and go. Yesterday when he said he was coming, I asked him to come early. He said he'd come when he'd come. He wasn't going to cater to me. Apparently he did.

 

All his stuff still isn't out. He didn't have room. ****.

 

He asked me what he did to me. I told him he treated me like a dog. He said that one day i'd see!

 

I wish i was still angry.

 

You should be angry. And I told you he'd be back with the mind games. One day you'll see? HA! Yeah, one day you'll see what a jerk and a loser he is. Jerk! Why am I angry over this and you're not, MB? Why do you say, elsewhere on LS that he only beat you up "once?" Once should have been enough.

 

I'm angry. I should stop posting altogether.

[Miss_Bee]

You should be angry. And I told you he'd be back with the mind games. One day you'll see? HA! Yeah, one day you'll see what a jerk and a loser he is. Jerk! Why am I angry over this and you're not, MB? Why do you say, elsewhere on LS that he only beat you up "once?" Once should have been enough.

 

I'm angry. I should stop posting altogether.

 

No please don't stop posting Touche. I really appreciate your support, I do. I'm just a huge mess right now is all. I'm sorry.

 

I am still angry. I've been angry for a long time. Angry at myself for allowing him to treat me like i'm nothing. Like a door mat. Or a frucking dog he can kick around. If I wasn't angry and i had forgiven him for all that and for his continued betrayal with that nasty fugly porn queen... I would still be with him. But i'm not.

 

But right now, i'm just really sad and anger has taken the back burner for the moment. Sad that he's gone. I can't help it. Regardless of how bad our relationship was I still love him. I can't help that.

[Touche]

No please don't stop posting Touche. I really appreciate your support, I do. I'm just a huge mess right now is all. I'm sorry.

 

I am still angry. I've been angry for a long time. Angry at myself for allowing him to treat me like i'm nothing. Like a door mat. Or a frucking dog he can kick around. If I wasn't angry and i had forgiven him for all that and for his continued betrayal with that nasty fugly porn queen... I would still be with him. But i'm not.

 

But right now, i'm just really sad and anger has taken the back burner for the moment. Sad that he's gone. I can't help it. Regardless of how bad our relationship was I still love him. I can't help that.

 

You're right, MB. If you weren't angry at all you would have begged him not to go. I was wrong. Didn't mean to be harsh...I'm a bit peeved over something else now so I wasn't thinking straight.

 

It's natural for you to be sad right now. I can completely understand that. You'll be ok. Let yourself be sad for awhile. And talk about it here. The coping forum might be helpful to you too.

 

You'll be ok. I sense a strength in you, MB. I know my instincts are right. Hang in there, ok. And it's really ok to be sad now.

[IpAncA]

I just found this and I'm glad you got out of that situation.

 

I'll post my response later. Hang in there .

 

Oh and that response "one day you'll see," is just a mind game tatic. Ignore it.

[IpAncA]

Well I pretty much agree with what everyone has been saying.

 

Like I said I'm glad you got out of that situation.

 

So what's going to happen now? You mentioned your pregnant. Is he pretty much out of your life or what?

[Pyro]

He just pulled out of the driveway. I never left when he got here. I had no idea that he was coming so early. The girls were waiting to be picked up so i couldn't just get up and go. Yesterday when he said he was coming, I asked him to come early. He said he'd come when he'd come. He wasn't going to cater to me. Apparently he did.

 

All his stuff still isn't out. He didn't have room. ****.

 

He asked me what he did to me. I told him he treated me like a dog. He said that one day i'd see!

 

I wish i was still angry.

 

At this point he is still pissed that you ended things with him. It will come up a little down the road, but I believe that he will put on that front that he has put on before and try to get you to take him back. For now he is acting very childish and because of who he is and of his anger, he is going to do and say what he can to bring you down and try to get you to lose your confidence. Why? Because that is how an immature prick handles their emotions.

[Miss_Bee]

Thanks IP,

 

I guess I just have to take it one breath at a time. I found a tool to help me stay angry and not want to just give up and say "my baby i'm sorry i kicked you out!"

 

I remembered my old journals that i had hidden downstairs. All the pain I endured in the beginning of the relationship is written on paper and serves as a good reminder. Not that i need one. Theres alot of shyte to remember from just recently never mind the beginning..

 

I know that in the beginning it was all my fault that i got hurt. I fought for him and i stayed, knowing that eventually he'd choose me. He did, but after so much heartache. It was my fault though nonetheless.

 

Yes i'm pregnant, i'm terrified about that part. Raising a newborn alone will be tough. I'm sure that he'll be a big part of the baby's life. I don't know.. I'll just have to take that as it comes also.

[Miss_Bee]

At this point he is still pissed that you ended things with him. It will come up a little down the road, but I believe that he will put on that front that he has put on before and try to get you to take him back. For now he is acting very childish and because of who he is and of his anger, he is going to do and say what he can to bring you down and try to get you to lose your confidence. Why? Because that is how an immature prick handles their emotions.

 

Well I just don't know,I don't know much, but You always seem to be right . I can't even think straight right now Rids. I'm not taking this very well. I don't know how to handle all of this. I am lost.

 

He just left for picking up the last of his things. Part of me wanted to jump up and hug him. The rest of me kept me grounded in my computer chair. He didn't say anything. He gave me my house key and as he walked out all he said was "You know where i am".

[alphamale]

wow thats pretty heavy stuff M_B....hope you're doin' ok

[Miss_Bee]

wow thats pretty heavy stuff M_B....hope you're doin' ok

 

To tell you the truth Alpha, I'm not.Thank you though.

 

It could be worse I guess. I would be alot worse off if I didn't have all of you guys here helping me along.

 

Actually to tell you the truth, if i hadn't have found this site, i'd probably still be with him.

[Lizzie60]

Everyone tells me that i'll be so much better off, that I can do better. I'll be happier, then why do i feel as if i'm dying inside?

 

You will feel like crap for a little while... but not too long... then you will feel 'relieved'... free...

 

I can't believe you put up for so long with this SOB. Wow... now you need to move on... forget about him...

 

I felt like crap both times I left my exes... but it only last a while... now, I wouldn't change anything...I am happier than I ever have been...

 

Take care of yourself and your child... never mind this scumbag.

 

ps: Print your original post (or the whole thread) and read it when you feel down...

 

Good luck! Keep posting.

[IpAncA]

You know, as the days go on your feel better about this.

 

If he is how you say he is or even worse, your better off without him. You really are.

[johan]

He reminds me of my ex. She was much milder, but the pattern is similar. The problem with her was there was no way to get her to acknowledge that she had some things to fix. It was all just a clever way for me to deflect the blame or to get behind her defenses. There's nothing you can do with someone who considers you, the person they love the most, as their enemy.

 

The most curious thing about people like that is that they seem to think their partner is the scum of the Earth, but they never leave them. If I thought so little of my woman, I couldn't stay with her. That's the clue that their efforts to bring you down and make you feel all the responsibility for what goes wrong is just a load of crap.

 

You will be much happier with someone who knows how to love.

 

The hard question you have to ask yourself is why you stayed as long as you did. Your first responsibility is to take care of yourself. And if taking care of yourself makes it impossible to be with someone, like it would have with him, then that person must go. You forgot to take care of yourself.

[Pyro]

Well I just don't know,I don't know much, but You always seem to be right . I can't even think straight right now Rids. I'm not taking this very well. I don't know how to handle all of this. I am lost.

 

He just left for picking up the last of his things. Part of me wanted to jump up and hug him. The rest of me kept me grounded in my computer chair. He didn't say anything. He gave me my house key and as he walked out all he said was "You know where i am".

 

It is hard to handle a situation like this, especially since you breaking it off with him happened all of a sudden. You weren't prepared to deal with a situation like this, but you are here to learn and learn you shall.

 

This is day one of your recovery and we will be with you along the way the entire time.

 

(Just a suggestion, but you could always look at older threads that deal with break-ups and read about how others who have been in the same situation handled things.)

[eraforevermore]

Thanks IP,

 

I guess I just have to take it one breath at a time. I found a tool to help me stay angry and not want to just give up and say "my baby i'm sorry i kicked you out!"

 

I remembered my old journals that i had hidden downstairs. All the pain I endured in the beginning of the relationship is written on paper and serves as a good reminder. Not that i need one. Theres alot of shyte to remember from just recently never mind the beginning..

 

I know that in the beginning it was all my fault that i got hurt. I fought for him and i stayed, knowing that eventually he'd choose me. He did, but after so much heartache. It was my fault though nonetheless.

 

Yes i'm pregnant, i'm terrified about that part. Raising a newborn alone will be tough. I'm sure that he'll be a big part of the baby's life. I don't know.. I'll just have to take that as it comes also.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Baby I;m sorry is ALL it would have taken.

[Touche]

Baby I;m sorry is ALL it would have taken.

 

Nope, life don't work like that honey. The person who was verbally abused and physically assaulted and locked in their room doesn't apologize. Get it now?

 

What does she have to apologize for? Yeah, maybe she said some things she shouldn't. We ALL do that from time to time. But cheating, hitting and locking someone in their house crosses over into a whole other world.

 

So tell us what she has to apologize for...if you even can.

[Miss_Bee]

Oh crap. Here we go.

 

Look, the last thing i want is for any of this to turn into a war. Please Era. You said you found yourself a forum to go to. This thread is mine. If you want to say something to me then do it. But not on here. There are many other means of communication other than you posting to my threads on here.

[Touche]

Oh crap. Here we go.

 

Look, the last thing i want is for any of this to turn into a war. Please Era. You said you found yourself a forum to go to. This thread is mine. If you want to say something to me then do it. But not on here. There are many other means of communication other than you posting to my threads on here.

 

NO! He's a big, macho man. Let him explain himself. We'll eat him up and spit him out. Abusers are cowards. All of them. Not real men.

 

I for one, want him to stick around. Maybe he'll realize the damage he's done. Maybe he'll actually get himself help. Maybe he'll go back and read his past post where he said how wonderful and beautiful you are...his "lady." Is that how you treat your lady?

 

I'm going to be sick.

 

Maybe the good LS men can explain it to you. Because I may very well lose it, having taken what you and your ilk dish out in the past. Thank GOD I got rid of that loser and got me a REAL man. One who REALLY knows how to treat a woman like me. One who appreciates me and would NEVER call me names or hit me or lock me in a room.

 

Some people's idea of love is just pathetic and sick.

[IpAncA]

Actually what's sad is that it's not being denied.

 

Ugh...M_B I hope your doing at least a little better. Here have a smily .

[Pyro]

Actually what's sad is that it's not being denied.

 

Ugh...M_B I hope your doing at least a little better. Here have a smily .

 

That shouldn't have even been mentioned on here. If he had anything to say to her, it should have been away from a public forum.

 

I'll add into the donation as well::):):)

[Touche]

It's not suprising that it's not being denied or even addressed. Bullies are known to be cowards when you stand up to them.

 

And Rid, sorry but I don't agree with you this time. Let him address MB all he wants to HERE instead of to her face or some other way that might put her in harm's way or make her back down.

 

We can help her see through his BS. He's known to get violent and to manipulate her. So why should we encourage her to take this into a private arena. He's chosen to come on here and make it public. And I for one, encourage it.

 

Let MB see how WE all see the way he tries to break her down and manipulate. If she's alone, she might weaken. And that's just not in her or his children's best interest.

[Pyro]

It's not suprising that it's not being denied or even addressed. Bullies are known to be cowards when you stand up to them.

 

And Rid, sorry but I don't agree with you this time. Let him address MB all he wants to HERE instead of to her face or some other way that might put her in harm's way or make her back down.

 

We can help her see through his BS. He's known to get violent and to manipulate her. So why should we encourage her to take this into a private arena. He's chosen to come on here and make it public. And I for one, encourage it.

 

Let MB see how WE all see the way he tries to break her down and manipulate. If she's alone, she might weaken. Not in her or his children's best interest.

 

Well thus far he has kept it civil, but I was just assuming the worst from him. If its kept civil then you are right.

[Touche]

Well thus far he has kept it civil, but I was just assuming the worst from him. If its kept civil then you are right.

 

Civil? To tell her that SHE should apologize? Ok, if you say so. But you know what? Even if he isn't civil as you state, and he gets crazy, wouldn't it be better if he did it here instead of privately with her where she might be vulnerable? Let everyone see what and who he really is and call him on it. That would be quite an eye-opener and will help MB with her healing. So she'll see that it's not HER like he'd have her believe.

 

So either way, it's best IMO if it IS kept here and away from her and her kids.

[Pyro]

Civil? To tell her that SHE should apologize? Ok, if you say so. But you know what? Even if he isn't civil as you state, and he gets crazy, wouldn't it be better if he did it here instead of privately with her where she might be vulnerable? Let everyone see what and who he really is and call him on it. That would be quite an eye-opener and will help MB with her healing. So she'll see that it's not HER like he'd have her believe.

 

So either way, it's best IMO if it IS kept here and away from her and her kids.

 

I agree that the kids shouldn't have to see or hear it, but I would hate for this thread to be deleted. I want MB to always have this thread available so she can look back on the whole situation.

 

By civil I meant no name calling and below the belt insults. Him telling her to apologize is just his blurred perception of what is going on.

 

Either way has pros and cons, so whatever works.