NC377 Posted June 14, 2007 Posted June 14, 2007 I am just starting to hang around guys again after having gone through a breakup about 8 months ago. Some are nice and I"m glad to have them just as friends. The problem is that the ones that I see as dating potential seem to like to complain. Last night, I went to a movie who I always thought was a player. I have been trying to just hang when I'm in the mood. We have hung around a couple of times and the first time I thought he was just young, immature and too much into material things. But then we hung around other times and he seemed more mature and funny. Two nights ago, I happened to run into him and he was with another girl. It didn't bother me, but it just confirmed my thoughts that he was a player. On the other hand, he was complaining that I seem to only hang out with old people. I like people of all ages - young and old. Then, he proceeded to complain about the event. Next, after the movie, he complained that he didn't like it much. My last boyfriend seemed to like to complain about everything too. He was from abroad and just complained about the city. I am like well if you don't like it here, you can just go home. Why live somewhere you don't like. So am I being too hard on the complainers? I admit that I complain too, but try to keep it to a minimum or change the situation if I am constantly complaining - ie. jobs, boyfriends.
LoveLace Posted June 14, 2007 Posted June 14, 2007 I feel ya-- I can't stand guys that complain around me too much. It's ok to bitch about traffic or something every once in a while -- but I dated a guy once that acted as though every small problem was the end of the world. It actually made me complain less about the daily things myself...well I'll never be able to stop complaining about traffic!! But other things, like spilling something on my shirt, those things don't get to me anymore. I guess hearing someone else do it made me minimize it myself. There's an idea for ya-- just start whining a lot when your around the guys, and see how they react!! Tell them that's how they sound and it's annoying!
Krytellan Posted June 14, 2007 Posted June 14, 2007 I would be more inclined to think that you just flat out attract complainers. We all attract a certain type of people based on how we project ourselves to others. Have you considered that you might give off an air of discontent, thereby attracting those that are like you? I am neither spiritual nor religious, but I am a firm believer in the laws of attraction.
Author NC377 Posted June 14, 2007 Author Posted June 14, 2007 Thanks LoveLace, I'll take the advice and complain back. Krytellan, I agree with the laws of attraction. I had hoped that I was complaining less since things are getting better, but perhaps there is still something I've got to change so I complain less. I was really complaining about my job last year and I think my friends were getting tired of listening to it, but I quit and got a job that I like much better. My friends have commented how I don't complain about my job anymore. As for my friends, most of them never complain so I guess it just has to do with people that I'm interested in.
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