funkybassplayer Posted June 14, 2007 Posted June 14, 2007 Yesterday i sent the last of my ex stuff back. When i sent the first lot, i put a little note saying always here for you. Yesterday i sent back the last of her stuff a couple of her personel bits that were here, and put in no note at all. This morning, i woke up for the for the first time in ages with no sadness! Could i have sent away the ghosts too? Well this girl had loads of issues, maybe read my other tread, but up till now i was wollowing in sadness for her and the kids. Now im starting to think what everyone was saying here, that shes not a good un, and f......up! i feel for the first time she never deserved me! I sent back quite a big cheque a few days ago, and she never even had the decency to let me know she got it! ( i hope she did!) I think all her actions are confirming my new thoughts on this girl, and im better off out. Lets hope this is not just an up day, but today i feel better.
tinke Posted June 14, 2007 Posted June 14, 2007 we seem to falsely glorify our lost loved ones, at least, initially. that is part of the healing with removing oneself with n/c. it helps put things into proper perspective...of course, this is over time. at first, i dwelled on how wonderful my ex was etc. but as time went on, the other memories came into play, which at least added balance to my thoughts whereas i can look at the situation much more objectively. no, he WAS NOT so wonderful all of the time! in fact, there was hurt present..hurt he has caused. good for you. try to keep looking at what is best for you, rather than trying to salvage something that may require much more work than it deserves. the truth is, it had to be two people working at it, two people invested, two people that are actively sensitive to the other's words and needs. it is draining to be the only one pulling a relationship together, it leaves many feelings of hurt and resentment. keep looking forward to spending those energies on wonderful you!
Author funkybassplayer Posted June 14, 2007 Author Posted June 14, 2007 aw thank you thats nice words, and you, and hopefully soon, as im seeing her in the real world, she will see who i am and what i was doing for her!
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