Jack'a Posted June 12, 2007 Posted June 12, 2007 Hi all, I'm new to this forum, but I've found it to be very useful. I've been reading quite a few threads, and found some of them to be very comforting. ( Wow... there are actually people who are feeling much worse than me). I guess it's the thought of "I'm actually not the only one who's feeling pain, there are others out there like me" gives some level of comfort. So I thought, perhaps I can share a little as to how a girl broke up with me. It may make you feel a little better about your situation, MAYBE Well.. We had been going out for 1 year and 4 months, not all that long I know, during that time, we had our up and downs as there always will be in a relationship... But we had always managed to work our way out of it pretty quickly. Everything was getting on fine, and then I became really busy for a semester, didn't get to see her much during the weekdays except we would always study together on Mondays, and see each other during the weekends. Then things turned a little sour.. she started to complain about how she's not spending enough time with her friends during the weekends, and then she also started to miss her ex's ( I know so, because she told me so, I guess she misses the how much fun they used to have). NIGHTMARE! One of her guy friends started text messaging her a lot, asking her to dump me and be with him. I know the person and he knows me as well.. and always had a feeling that he'd had ulterior motive. So I asked her what she was going to do about him, she told me that she wouldn't go near the guy again. I was quite satisfied with that, so I left it there. And then about 2 months later she hang out with him and 2 other friends, 2 guys and 2 girls ( sounded like a double date) until 4am in the morning. I was like.." WTF! Why him??? Why!!! couldn't you see that this was the person that tried pretty hard to break us up!??!!" She ended defending for him " He's over it, it doesn't matter, he's just like that". Had a huge fight after that.. and then, after about a week, she told me that she's been in denial for a long time, she fell out of love with me, she tried to love me, but she couldn't, but she couldn't bear to break the news to me... So.. that's the long story in short... I've been in love with a person who was telling herself to love me, I gave her my all, I did the best I could... and yes... I admit that I did become her doormat during the relationship. I cried, and I cried, and I begged, I tried searching for answers as to why she fell out of love with me.. I felt worthless after all the things I had done. And how she just turned around and said to my face " I will never love you again I know, I was in denial for a long time, now piss off and leave me the hell alone!" ------------------------------------------------ Instead of sending this to her... I guess I'll just share it with you all... This was intended with 19 roses, with 1 arriving to her place each day, 19 days prior to her bday... 19 Roses, For your 19 years of life, For the one hundred and 19 sleepless nights, And the 19 hundred of wishes I've made, And the 19 thousands of prayers I've said, Wishing you another one hundred and 19 thousands of happy moments in life, And through the 19 thousands of prayers I've said, And the 19 hundred of wishes I've made, During those the one hundred and 19 sleepless nights, I still cannot think of 19 lines Happy Birthday
BlueEyedSarah Posted June 12, 2007 Posted June 12, 2007 Ouch - That sucks about your break up! My story My ex of 1 year and 3 months broke up with me due to relegion... He has been brought up and raised as Jahova Witness, he's parents were alright with us dating at first and then after a year (same as he's other ex girlfriend before me) they started bugging him and wanting him to dump me because I'm not a JW. I think they bribed him with a whole bunch of stuff that he wanted (redecorated room, hd tv, xbox 360, a load ect because he dumped me...over MSN! I asked him to call me or if I could call him so we can talk about it and if he was sure he wanted to break up to do it over the phone rather than doing it the weak way over a IM...but nope...he didnt do that. So I was in NC with him for about 3 months and he came crawling back saying he wants me back. I talk to him now and again and don't mind being friends with him, I'm not thinking of having any relationship with anyone right now as I want to settle down at home and have a job so I can get some things that I enjoy in life.
ddnnee Posted June 12, 2007 Posted June 12, 2007 my breakup: i dated my bestfriend's younger sister and it worked out okay. my bestfriend was ok with it, whew! one of my close guy buddies hung around me often and met my gf often as well. 10 months later we had an arguement and i asked for 1 week NC. xgf went and slept with my close buddy and to make sure i get the message, they both french kissed infront of me. now im a hermit that hates all american girls. oh ya, reason for arguement that led to breakup: gf got a bladder infection and went to the hospital. she didn't call me, instead, called my close buddy to visit her... which pissed me off and i want NC. her reason was "i didn't want you to get worried around your final exam time". what i learned: a girl with a history of multiple x-bfs (4 x's) has lost her sense of love and end up with a jaded heart. Pre-owned girls can no longer genuinely love, therefore, breakup and divorce is very easy for them. anyone who argues against my acquired knowledge must be a fat kid living in their mom's basement. girls who argue are just fat girls.
trent25 Posted June 12, 2007 Posted June 12, 2007 Jack, I know you are hurt. Stay away from this chick. She is young. She doesn't know what she wants. She loves attention. She lost attraction to you because like you said you became her doormat. But you didn't do it because you are weak. You did it because you really liked the chick. That is cool, next time just don't give so much. They love it when you are a constant challenge. A woman at 40 or 20 it doesn't matter. She likes the feeling that she could lose you at anytime. Don't let anyone else tell you other wise. Women especially, put more value on things they can't get or can lose. So next time hold your cards until a woman PROVES consistently that she loves you. Even then, don't give it all because its always good to be mysterious. I am not trying to preach. Don't cry over her. Next time you see her smile and say to yourself. "If this chicked really wanted me, would she even consider going with a guy when I asked her not to?". A girl who really likes you won't even consider offending you like this. Hang in there and read the post I just put up.
passionpeach Posted June 12, 2007 Posted June 12, 2007 I had the same experience as BluEyedSarah. Alexis and I broke up due to our religion. I am a Baptist and he is a Catholic. It was a very healthy relationship except for the issues on our religion. I am solidly founded and raised on Baptist doctrine as he is also raised and trained on Catholic dogma. We tried to make it work for a couple of times. We even tried to bend to each other just so that we do not argue about religion. But things just fell out of place all the more as we already started pretending that we are okay about it even though we are not. Eventually, we decided to part ways and move on instead of comprising our beliefs. We both got hurt and cried a lot knowing that we still love each other but we know that it will never work.
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