insanelyjelous Posted June 11, 2007 Posted June 11, 2007 Hi everyone, I need some advice desparately, i've been with my fiance for four years now we have a 2 month old and I have another child from a previous relationship, we live together and have done for 2 years now. Our relationship wasn't exactly that great to start with but it really started to deteriorate when I was pregnant although he wanted our child as much as I did, he stopped having sex with me almost completely unless I forced him to, (he had an extremely high sex drive as did I so you can imagine this didn't do much for my self esteem) he was never much of a talker but that completely stopped as well, it's almost like he moved out and a stranger moved in. I've known my fiance for 12+ years and it was me who did all the chasing from the start. last year he told me that if I hadn't of wanted to be with him then he wouldn't have chased me ( there goes the self esteem again!) he has also told me that he didn't think he could love anyone apart from his first girlfriend (they were together for a long time and he always thought it was her who he would marry but they broke up, apparently mutual but he has told me that he could never open up to another person the way he did with her so I guess it really hurt him) but he could tolerate them and thats was what our relationship was. that really hurt me.... He has never complimented me once in our 4 year relationship and it was me that proposed to him, although now i'm wondering if that was the biggest mistake I ever made. I love him unconditionally and I always have but recently I have started to think that I've made a mistake since I've had the baby he still hasn't wanted to have sex with me and i've still had to initiate it just to get any (V frustrating with a sex drive as high as mine) he now come's home and either plays video games until it's time to go to bed or goes back out again. I've tried to talk to him on the few occassions he's been home but all I get is a blank expression or the rolling eyes and no communication back from him he says that there's nothing wrong it's me who's got the issues. Even last nite I tried again to talk to him, I asked him if he still found me sexually attractive and he said yes so I asked him how comes he didn't want to have sex anymore and he just completly blanked me I told him that I couldn't do this anymore and that he needed to talk to me but he just said he needed a shower and asked me if I was coming.... I just don't get him, if he doesn't want to be with me anymore then why doesn't he just say so, I can't bear to live like this anymore, I feel so alone I might as well be single cos at least then I'd know where I stood. I love him and our son to pieces and I want to try and work on what little we do have. I don't want to be the one to instigate a break up but I feel that right now that is my only option. please help me
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