EnigmasMuse Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 For those of you who have read books on relationships, do you feel you learned anything that they had to offer? Did you apply any of those things to your life/relationships? No, I don't think ALL books are the key or the answers to ALL of relationships problems, but sometimes they do make for a good read, and can be informative or helpful of things to try. I have seen, where there are some people who say they have read this book or that book about women or men in general, and how they can be this way or that way, and they kind of come across as whatever they have read, they are bashing that particular gender because of a book they have read. And then they take it out on that gender, it would seem to me thats probably not a very helpful kind of book. So, if you have read books on relationships what have they taught you?
tanbark813 Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 The Five Love Languages was good. In a past relationship my love languages differed from my (now ex-)gf's and that book kind of put things in a clearer light. Once you read it it's easy to quickly identify how a person likes being shown affection or appreciation. But I think a lot of relationship books you kind of have to wade through a bunch of stuff to find the nuggets of wisdom, not unlike LS I suppose.
Star Gazer Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 I've read them all. Most of them are on "the game" in some way, and I wind up more confused that anything. The one that I pick up repeatedly though is "Mars and Venus on a Date." I know it's cheesy and allathat, but it reminds you of the very clear stages of a relationship, reminding you not to rush anything. Thing is, I end up reading it again after I've already rushed, and end up doing the *facepalms* when I realize what went wrong. 5LL was good, but I still have a hard time understanding how to figure out someone else's love language because they always seem to mix it up on me. This type of book is better utilized when IN a relationship though, and since I'm not in one I haven't read it for a while. I do resort to the "He's just not that into you" concept though, if only to justify an easy way to obtain closure. I just wish everyone came with a user manual. I could write my own...
dropdeadlegs Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 The Five Love Languages was good. In a past relationship my love languages differed from my (now ex-)gf's and that book kind of put things in a clearer light. Once you read it it's easy to quickly identify how a person likes being shown affection or appreciation. But I think a lot of relationship books you kind of have to wade through a bunch of stuff to find the nuggets of wisdom, not unlike LS I suppose. This is pretty much my answer. I haven't read a lot of self help books, but this one helped me to understand that saying "Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with everything they have." As SG stated, it probably is a better tool (or easier to put to use) when in a relationship because there is a series of questions that point out what language is your primary one and if you both take that quiz it can be easily determined if you are on the same page. I haven't read the Mars/Venus books or "He's Not That Into You", but I have read a lot about them on LS and many seem to see a lot of good in them. "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" had some useful points for me, personally. I have learned and applied some things with the Love Language info having the most profound affect on my understanding of relationships.
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