heggs Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 Ok well where to start, Well after about 3 - 4 weeks N/C with my ex, I recieve a txt msg saying " Come on to msn We need to talk" as she is the dumper, Unblock her asked her what she wanted, So we got talkin blah blah she ended up telling me she Hasnt stoped loving me.. and wants us to be again but as she still has a bf its pissing me off.. so I told her Im not sure, So since saying that she got mad. I log off for about 20 mins come back and she has her msn name as "I love Ben" Logged on and said to her, Nice name lies much?, She said, haha i knew my name would work and get you caught up. So this is where I blocked her and ended the convo. Got a msg today saying come to my party saturday i havent replied niether will be turning up. Can anyone help me with this, entirely confused. Heggs.
BlueEyedSarah Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 MSN sucks! I think you should give her NC because she is messing you around, she has a boyfiriend for gosh sakes...what the heck is she doing? Oh yea thats right...she is playing you around, its all a mind game by the sounds of it. Leave her be, go out and do things for yourself and forget about this mind playing chick.
Author heggs Posted June 7, 2007 Author Posted June 7, 2007 well ok... Im now told she has no bf wont take tha for granted prob just another story from the great vine, But shes invited me out to tea with some of her friends this weekend do I go? Or do I stay away. Also at the end of the msn chat she told me to txt her for some reason no idea. Any help appreciated thank Cheers
alasia Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 Well I'm no expert (far from it!) but I think you should tell her you're busy. Don't be rude about it, but just make out like you have plans for the weekend. If she really cares about you, she won't let that put her off and she'll put more effort into trying to win you back.
BlueEyedSarah Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 I agree with the above post, just make it out as though your busy.
Star Gazer Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 Is there a reason why you two don't pick up the phone and CALL?? These sorts of conversations should not take place through the written word.
Author heggs Posted June 8, 2007 Author Posted June 8, 2007 she dosent like the phone cause we alwways fight/ she get nerveous so yes, So Ill just tell her im busy this weekend, and what if shes got nuts and has a sook about it?
Star Gazer Posted June 8, 2007 Posted June 8, 2007 If you can't even talk to her because she gets too nervous and you guys fight, why are you even concerned about a relationship with her? You absolutely have to be able to COMMUNICATE with the person you're with - and that does mean communicate in person/phone. You don't even get along when chatting on instant messenger for crying out loud...seriously, what's the point here? I think you know even thinking about her is a fruitless exercise. There's no need to lie to her and make up some lameo excuse. This relationship is not one you want to be in. Simply tell her that, and move on. Life is too short to waste on bananas like this.
Author heggs Posted June 9, 2007 Author Posted June 9, 2007 well well get this she ends up txting me asking me to come to her party, also asking me to tell her a story cause she loves my stories lol wtf is that about?, anyways not goin to the party, also invited to tea tomorow night and im not going for the fact that im wasting my time. If she really wants it to be shell be there waiting, for now im through with her Any help apprecitated
oppath Posted June 9, 2007 Posted June 9, 2007 I agree with SG. I know, after a breakup, we want to maintain our pride so we'll use email/text for conversations, because we refuse to call the person as part of NC or whatever. Anything important, if you are going to respond, talk, or react at all, at least do it over the phone. You need to gauge tone. In the written format, tone can be too emotionally charged the other person just becomes defensive, and things just get worse. I learned this lesson the hard way. My ex f*cked with my head after the breakup and it really angered me, and it resulted in one of those dignity losing moments, a long angry email. Much self esteem would have been retained had I called and said "I'm really pissed at you right now, you crossed the line" or just ignored her or politely said "no thanks. Let me heal." It's not as simple as that, because I told her to give me space 3 times and 3 times she violated my request, but I made the mistake out of pride not to man up and communicate directly, because she dumped me. This, I regret. Call her, tell her to stop, and move on, or just ignore. I'm a big fan of 1, polite as possible, tell off, because I feel it is assertive.
Author heggs Posted June 9, 2007 Author Posted June 9, 2007 this means block her msn and dont reply to txt msges?
trent25 Posted June 9, 2007 Posted June 9, 2007 Tell this spoiled little brat who has another man in her life to give you a call or show up at the doorstep if she knows where you live. If she doesn't want to talk face to face tell her "I'll see you on the other side" and turn around walk away. Stop giving them attention guys. They want guys who they CAN'T have. So always keep them on their toes.
passionpeach Posted June 9, 2007 Posted June 9, 2007 I know that it can be so confusing at times but it is not all that difficult to see as long as you have an open heart to really see what is going on. You should realize that if she can cheat or plan on cheating on her man with you, then it's not impossible for her to do the same to you. I am not saying that you totally block her off. Remain friends with her. I think that is just ok. But plunging into a relationship with her is a different story and way too risky. You are the best judge to her actions. Do not be swayed but the sweetness and concern she may show. she's not the last girl in the planet anyway. Do not be so tense. Just let it slide.
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