ellenana007 Posted June 3, 2007 Posted June 3, 2007 My long time lover (not boyfriend , just told me that he's moving to Canada...to be with his ex-girlfriend, who had his baby 8 months ago. There are several reasons that he has cited: 1) he feels terrible never having seen his daughter . 2) he's 30 years old and he wants to settle down - which seems less possible with me , given that im 23, and i move to NY in 2 months to start investment banking at a bank (we currently live in MA) 3) he's illegal in the US, and Canada will grant his citizenship. He leaves in 1 days' time, but he only notified me 2 days ago. I am so hurt, because we've been together for 3 years, i have so many memories about us - both good and bad, but it sucks that i dont have any way to convince him to stay. How do you deal with the idea of never seeing someone again, knowing they are going to be with another woman - and knowing tha you're powerless. So many things hurt me - the fact that i wont see him again, the fact that i dont have any say. I had just thought of my future with him included. I think another thing that hurts is that he weighed his options...and i turned out not to be the better one. I think he is also substantially hurt too...we both cried like crazy 2 days ago...we spent 4 hours crying; it was unbelievable. i am hurt because i am being forced to move on with my life. i dont want to give him up. i dont want to not see him for the next 10 years. this hurts so much. I wish i could make him stay.
norajane Posted June 4, 2007 Posted June 4, 2007 Well, consider the fact that you've been together 3 years, but he has a daughter that's 8 months old. Somewhere in there, he was cheating on his girlfriend or you or both. Which makes him less than a desirable 'prize'. Not only that, he only told you a couple days before leaving...that also doesn't sound like someone who is thinking about anyone but himself. And think how his gf might feel - he's going to her because he can get citizenship in Canada! Doesn't sound like true luv to me. I hope she doesn't marry him solely to help him get his citizenship. And you're not being forced to move on with your life. You were already doing that all on your own - you have a whole new life in NY with a great new job to look forward to. You were planning to do that with or without him, weren't you? So how does that make your choice any different than his - you weighed your options and you planned to take this job and move. In a very short while, you won't feel so bad about this guy because you will have so many new adventure and new men to explore.
Recommended Posts