funkybassplayer Posted June 2, 2007 Posted June 2, 2007 Hello all, ok im new to this, but hoping this will help me move on and forward. Well my story is i met a girl about a year and a half ago on a dating site, she is 34 3 kids aged 3-8-15. Well to cut a long story short, it was a long distance relationship (150 miles) But as im a pro bassist, and only work once a week it was fine. i used to stay at hers for 3 nights a week. anyway i really enjoyed all the time i spent with them and quickly became part of the family. But after a few months cracks started, she was always very possesive of me, but i liked that, but was always going out with her young friend, and she would not divorce her husband. She seemed always too tired to do anything with me, and i started to find her less sexualy attractive as she was always ill or sleepy. I started spending time with the kids, as they were not getting out, there mum never took them anywhere. Anway about 2 months ago, she wanted me to sell up and move there, i wouldnt as i felt that there were too many issues that she wouldnt deal with or let me help her with. And i could have lost all my equity if i sold up and invested in her house to buy the husband out Anyway in mid April she ended it with me, but asked to be freinds. i didnt want to as we kissed and it was lovely a nice way to end i though. I wanted to go home and leave it at that. She started crying and like a sap i fell for it. After 2 weeks, i was going to do a gig close by, and thought it would be nice to see her and the kids. (in this time, we had sexy chats on the phone) On the day i was going there she text me i have been dating someone for 2 weeks! but i still want to see you. I felt hurt but i thought that i will still go to see the kids. I asked her why she was talking to me sexey during the time she was dating him, but she made out it never happend! I did really and still do love her and the kids very much and they loved me i was very close to the youngest girl, and the mum always encouged me too be part of there lives. ( she said that even as frinds i can be part of there lives) Well i checked that it will be ok with her and the new guy to come up and she said yes it would. Anyway in the morning i saw her, she was happy to see me and the kids were too, i was looking forward to being there with them for the day. Within five mins the phone goes, new guy saying i couldnt be there with the kids or her. I was so upset that i had to go, she told me best i go! i was there rock for a whole year and the kids step dad, and there was a guy been on the scene 2 weeks saying i couldnt be with them. and the kids were upset too. All i got from her about him was he clubs still at 41, has a fast car and spends lots of money on her, something that i couldnt, but i made up for it by being part of there family and helping with all the problems that came about. I went home heartbroken. I text her its not how i want to be treated, and she text back dont contact me again!. I was devestated. I mean letting go of a girl you love is hard but 3 kids too! So i owed her money, i texted her for her bank details and heard nothing back. About a week later (3 weeks ago) I called her, she was happy to hear my voice and i asked her if she wanted her moey and cds sent back. She said yes. I asked her if she missed me she said yes strait out but the new guy doent want me to speak to you or any other x! . Anyway a week later i got an email asking for the money and she gave me bank details. I put part of the money in on wednesday and text her to let her know, she text back saying thanks really needed the money, and hope your ok! Last night (friday) i texted; ''Am i ok? im finding things hard at the moment. miss you and the kids, and your face and holding you and your eyes, i enjoyed every day we were together-was electric x'' For the past 5 weeks my eyes have welled up, i cant even think about being with someone new at the moment If i go back on the dating site i lose interest quike, and think of her, and think about them loads. She must know how hard it must be for me. I have so much time on my hands now as well, as i dont have a day job. I am thinking of selling the house, and having some fun, but its too much of a good investment. I have a huge whole in my life now, and although it was not a fun relationship, i loved the family and her very much. I didnt think that i was on a time limit. Regarding the text i sent, I think she expected me to reply yes im fine, but thought hell, why should i take away any guilt she may have! i still have to give her money, and have some of her belongings here. I feel that since i texted her that i feel better inside, to tell her how i feel, even if its a confidence boost to her. i never got a reply back, but then i never expected one. I cant belive that she moved so quick onto her next relationship, and as soon as she did, did i nothing to her? , as thats how it seems. I Miss her and the kids so much, and im hoping in time, i can be freinds, for the kids really. I feel that after i sent the last text, i will not contact her again exept for sorting her stuff out, and she has a tent that i want back. How can someone that you love and they loved you treat me like this? i feel hurt used and worthless in her eyes. Something inside me says that she is missing me. I mean although she never replyed, she never complained about the text eighter. Its hard and im in a lot of pain and missing them all so much. I feel i have all this love to give but there not there to give it too. i have lost a love, and family and a life that i thought was going to be my future. Thanks for reading this.
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