milvushina Posted June 1, 2007 Posted June 1, 2007 Since we have been together, my husband seems to have lost contact with most of his friends. I partly understand because some of his friends had an unhealthy lifestyle, that he wanted to get away from. I have some friends that are the same way though, and while I don't really go party with them anymore I still visit them sometimes, and don't ignore their calls. Do you think it's weird that he hasn't had a single night out with his friends / the guys since we've been together (2.3 years)? He says I'm his best friend; I feel that way about him. But for some reason, it just seems strange to me that a man would not crave the company of other men. It seems weirder than a girl who doesn't have girlfriends, for some reason. We're both kind of introverted, stay-at-home people. I guess it's hard for me to believe sometimes that he does not get bored, even though I'm always doing the same things he is, and I don't get bored. He likes my friends and enjoys hanging out with them, but always grumbles a little at first when someone wants to come over. Just the other day, one of his friends called and was supposed to come over, but when he called back later H just decided to blow him off, not answer. I happen to have his cell today and noticed that besides that guy, none of his friends have called in about 2 weeks. He used to be really social. Anybody else like this? I'm not complaining, we have a lot of fun together, I just worry that he will regret it if he blows off his friends too much. He also has picked up a lot of my interests, more than I have his. It doesn't bother me, I just wonder why he would not explore new hobbies on his own more? Do some people just prefer to be introduced to things, or just aren't motivated to discover new things?
Bobster999 Posted June 1, 2007 Posted June 1, 2007 I'm like that and I consider myself normal---I just had no desire to "go out with the guys" after I was married.
hagi990 Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 So you would rather he was out drinking every night with his buddies and not givning you any attention. Be happy he's taking up your interests and friends, it will bring you closer together and when your both old and wrinkled you'll have the same interests and be bestfriends for life
Sobri821 Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 So you would rather he was out drinking every night with his buddies and not givning you any attention. Be happy he's taking up your interests and friends, it will bring you closer together and when your both old and wrinkled you'll have the same interests and be bestfriends for life YOU TELL HER! There is nothing wrong with the guy, until he starts wearing your clothing and changes his name to something similar to yours, be happy that you don't have a always out, inconsiderate guy, who blames you for not having enought time with friends. If it aint broken don't try to fix it.
Lizzie60 Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 Since we have been together, my husband seems to have lost contact with most of his friends. I partly understand because some of his friends had an unhealthy lifestyle, that he wanted to get away from. I have some friends that are the same way though, and while I don't really go party with them anymore I still visit them sometimes, and don't ignore their calls. Do you think it's weird that he hasn't had a single night out with his friends / the guys since we've been together (2.3 years)? He says I'm his best friend; I feel that way about him. But for some reason, it just seems strange to me that a man would not crave the company of other men. It seems weirder than a girl who doesn't have girlfriends, for some reason. We're both kind of introverted, stay-at-home people. I guess it's hard for me to believe sometimes that he does not get bored, even though I'm always doing the same things he is, and I don't get bored. He likes my friends and enjoys hanging out with them, but always grumbles a little at first when someone wants to come over. Just the other day, one of his friends called and was supposed to come over, but when he called back later H just decided to blow him off, not answer. I happen to have his cell today and noticed that besides that guy, none of his friends have called in about 2 weeks. He used to be really social. Anybody else like this? I'm not complaining, we have a lot of fun together, I just worry that he will regret it if he blows off his friends too much. He also has picked up a lot of my interests, more than I have his. It doesn't bother me, I just wonder why he would not explore new hobbies on his own more? Do some people just prefer to be introduced to things, or just aren't motivated to discover new things? People complain all the time about their partner's lack of attention, etc... and you are complaining because he's 'too nice' WOW... you need a good kick in the rear end my dear.. LOL There is nothing wrong with him.. he has changed and no longer have common grounds with his friends... that happens all the time.. people change. You should be happy that he's all for you... or maybe he's getting 'a little bit on your nerves'... LOL You see you don't get bored of him, you like his company... blablabla... so why can't it be the same for guys? R E A L L Y!!!!!! Don't worry be happy!!!!!
Woggle Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 Actually he should have his own friends and his own life. After a while you will get tired of him dependening in you for everything and you will start to feel smothered. Outside interests and friends are good for a marriage because people need to soak up the world in order to have things to bring to a marriage. Suggest that he join a club that relates to one of his interests or something.
EnigmaXOXO Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 People complain all the time about their partner's lack of attention, etc... and you are complaining because he's 'too nice' WOW... you need a good kick in the rear end my dear.. LOL There is nothing wrong with him.. he has changed and no longer have common grounds with his friends... that happens all the time.. people change. What Lizzie said !!
Author milvushina Posted June 7, 2007 Author Posted June 7, 2007 I did not expect so many answers! No no! I was not complaining.. I love that we give each other lots of attention. I'm glad he does not go out drinking all the time...been there before, it sucks. My concern was that he might actually want some of his friends to be around for him someday, you know? And I am afraid he will regret it if he runs them off completely. He doesn't depend on me for everything in a pathetic way, I just don't know how to encourage him to do things without me, without sounding like I'm saying, "Please get away from me!" A club is a good idea. I just thought, I could mention how it would be cool if he took up a sport he used to play a lot, but quit a few years ago.
Author milvushina Posted June 7, 2007 Author Posted June 7, 2007 You see you don't get bored of him, you like his company... blablabla... so why can't it be the same for guys? See - you noticed that huh, I don't know how that idea got in my head and it bothered me because it was kind of a sexist thought. I'm a little neurotic and make things out of proportion anyway, that's why I like this site, because I can do it here and be less neurotic in real life.
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