blue16 Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 Ok so theres this girl (girl #1) I met through a friend of a friend last summer, she had a boyfriend at the time. Throughout this period we had very loose contact, I'd see her every now and then through friends or around the neighbourhood - we never hung out tho. So a couple months ago she broke up with her boyfriend and I thought what the hell...i'll get to know her. I brought the idea up with a friend (friend #1) who knows her and she agreed it would be a good idea. So I started talking to her on MSN and quickly arranged a hang out at my house - she lives close by. Suddenly friend #1 finds out some new information about girl #1, and tells me not to hang out with her because she is bad relationship material, cheated on her BF...and that I should cancel plans and make up an excuse. I told friend #1 that I wasn't gonna cancel, but i would keep my distance emotionally. Me and girl #1 have a lot of mutual friends, and that's where it gets kinda complicated. Another friend of mine (friend #2, and former best friend of girl #1) told girl #1 that she doesn't want her to hang out with me because she is worried I am gonna get hurt, probably because she feels girl #1 is bad relationship material. I only told friend #1 about me and girl #1, so clearly there is some passing of information going on behind my back - friend #1 obviously told friend #2. Girl #1 wanted to know whether I still wanted to spend time with her because we certainly didn't have either friends approval. I told her I still wanted to hang out... So plans went through we watched a movie, it was fun we had a good time. I wasn't sure if she was interested or not...but we laughed and joked and it seemed alright at the very least. Friend #1 was very curious as to what happened, making sure I wasn't falling for her and I assured her I was keeping my emotional distance and that I was mostly looking for a hookup. Bare in mind that's not originally what I was after, but after hearing so much negative history about girl #1 I realized that a relationship probably shouldn't be in the possible list of options. I told friend #1 not to tell anyone about me and girl #1. So I talked to girl #1 on and off throughout the next couple weeks - everything was going fine. I wished her a happy birthday etc. and I was planning on asking her to hang out again. Normally she is on MSN all the time...even if she's not at home she leaves it on 'away'. Suddenly I notice she is never on MSN anymore. Not 'less frequently' but NEVER. I suspected that blocked me because cause I hadn't seen her online for 4 days, and I know that she has been home just as much as always. I confirmed it when friend #1 told me that she was on 'away' status even though on my computer she read 'offline'. That on top of the fact that I sent her a text message wondering if she wanted to hang out, and I got no response. This being a major change from before when she would always return my calls and texts very quickly. Her new behaviour was totally out of the blue! It's not like we had a big fight or something....just randomly (from my perspective) she started 100% totally ignoring me. I have to find out what's wrong...but at the same time it's not like girl #1 is my GF or anything so I don't want to blow this out of proportion. I'm not sure if she suddenly decided "you know what, I don't like this guy and I just decided I don't want to hang out or talk with him again..." or if there is some information that was passed between our mutual friends that gave her a negative impression of me. It just seems so random and sudden for her to decide she wasn't interested to the point of blocking me from all media. Regardless, I would like to know what's going on...I think I'm gonna send her an email but I'm not quite sure what to say exactly. I want to come across as confident but at the same time not too overbearing because like I said we have only officially hung out one on one once, even if I have been talking to her on and off the past few weeks.
DanielMadr Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 ...it's not like girl #1 is my GF or anything so I don't want to blow this out of proportion.... So dont. End of story. You can at best ask her 'How are you doing'. Dont pursue a dream. Give your effort to some more interested girl.
StartingOver07 Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 How old are you? Sounds to me like Girl 1 didn't like that Friends 1 and 2 were poisoning the well, so to speak, and got fed up with you. Good for her. Either give her a chance to prove herself to you independently, or be content with the fallout that will occur when you let your friends do your choosing for you.
LovesJim55 Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 Maybe it is possible that one of your friends went and told this girl you were just looking for a hookup with her.
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