MissKissNada_Gal Posted May 28, 2007 Posted May 28, 2007 Is jealousy a turn off to guys? If your boyfriend and/or guy that ur in a committed relationship with has a lot of girls for friends, its ok to be a little jealous right. its just cautiousness... but is it a turn off? would a guy run away from a jealous, meaning not over the top but simple comments about why he got to hand out with her instead of you... stuff like that. is it a turnoff?
oppath Posted May 28, 2007 Posted May 28, 2007 My take is that opposite sex of the same gender that were made before the relationship are fair game to hang out with whenever, even 1-on-1, but as soon as the relationship becomes official, you should be meeting that person, and every 2-3 times they hang out you should be invited, and you should almost always feel comfortable to say "I'm not doing anything can I come too." Opposite sex friends made during the relationship should be invited to group outings, not 1-on-1 events, until you have met that person several times and consider them your friend too. And your SO should definitely spend more time, communicate more often, and be more intimate with you. They should always say "I hung out with so and so today" if they did; they should hide nothing; and they should include you often. If your SO isn't doing this, and you bring it up, you are not being jealous, you are expressing your desire to be respected. You should know the important people in your SO's life, especially opposite sex friends. You should be given the opportunity to become friends with them too. They should know about you. My ex thought I was jealous because I wanted to meet some of her friends but she wouldn't let me because then her ex would find out she had moved on within a couple weeks of a 5 year relationship and feel hurt. That was bull****, I know that now. I wasn't jealous by saying "I want to feel like a priority; you always talk about these people, you've told me you loved me; I want to meet your friends. If you can't tell your ex you've moved on and are in a new relationship, it makes me feel disrespected and hurt." To her, that made me jealous and possessive. All I wanted was to feel important to her, included in her life, not hidden.
Lizzie60 Posted May 29, 2007 Posted May 29, 2007 Is jealousy a turn off to guys? If your boyfriend and/or guy that ur in a committed relationship with has a lot of girls for friends, its ok to be a little jealous right. its just cautiousness... but is it a turn off? would a guy run away from a jealous, meaning not over the top but simple comments about why he got to hand out with her instead of you... stuff like that. is it a turnoff? a turn-off...for both men and women... a 'little' 'very little' jealousy is fine and even 'nice' for the partner. If you nag or question or if he/she feels there is a 'trust' issue then it could be a huge turn-off. The best 'turn-on' is confidence. Being independant is a huge turn-on for both men and women... So be confident and independant and you will have your bf at your feet...trust me on that one.
gonetildecember Posted May 29, 2007 Posted May 29, 2007 My ex had a lot of female friends, and at first I was fine with it.. but the more and more time he spent with them- without me, drove me crazy... ultimately it was one of the reasons we broke up.. he felt he had to hide seeing them from me, because although I ususally didnt tell him not to do it..he could tell i was upset.. and would lie or hide spending time with them or talking to them. i think its a pretty natural feeling, but if it gets out of hand or u start to nag too much it can cause problems.. he also has to be aware that u may be a little uncomfortable with it, but if he has never given u a reason to distrust him...then don't put too much emphasis on it as it may drive him away
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