DanielMadr Posted May 30, 2007 Posted May 30, 2007 Tan & ArtCritic, where are guys at? I was really looking foward to your reponse on this thread. Tan is curently chasing a girl who doesnt want to give it up to him. And Artritic have been seen on that thread too. Btw SouthernT, how is it going? Still sitting on a park bench waiting for Mr. IdoAllTheChaseNoMatterWhatFeedBackFromHer?
Author SouthernT Posted May 30, 2007 Author Posted May 30, 2007 Tan is curently chasing a girl who doesnt want to give it up to him. And Artritic have been seen on that thread too. Btw SouthernT, how is it going? Still sitting on a park bench waiting for Mr. IdoAllTheChaseNoMatterWhatFeedBackFromHer? Very funny.... With the particular guy that I'm dealing with, I HAVE to be that way. Some men are comfortable with a woman initiating things and some men are more comforatable if they are taking the lead. Through MUCH trail and error with this guy, I've learned that he is the traditional type who likes to take the lead. Each guy is different Daniel. Thanks for your "concern" though.
DanielMadr Posted May 30, 2007 Posted May 30, 2007 Very funny.... With the particular guy that I'm dealing with, I HAVE to be that way. Some men are comfortable with a woman initiating things and some men are more comforatable if they are taking the lead. Through MUCH trail and error with this guy, I've learned that he is the traditional type who likes to take the lead. Each guy is different Daniel. Thanks for your "concern" though. It is not about leading it is about not enough feedback. You have to follow, unless you want to be dragged, you dirty girl
Author SouthernT Posted May 30, 2007 Author Posted May 30, 2007 It is not about leading it is about not enough feedback. You have to follow, unless you want to be dragged, you dirty girl :lmao: Well, where ever he leads, I will follow. (With plenty of feed back)
DanielMadr Posted May 30, 2007 Posted May 30, 2007 :lmao: Well, where ever he leads, I will follow. (With plenty of feed back) where ever....unless it is the bedroom
LoveLace Posted May 30, 2007 Posted May 30, 2007 Funny to see this thread right now...I've lived with my roommate almost a year now, but finally made a huge move the other night and he was into it. There ended up being some major messing around...since then he's been a total sweet heart to me. I was the main initiator but he was happy to play along. But we haven't talked about it since, and nothing else has happend since...but I think he sees me differently now, in a good way. Plus I have him wondering, because I haven't brought it up yet. I think guys like the challenge, they just don't want to work too hard to get it...really it's the women that end up doing the work, because we are the ones who have to give out the right signals, otherwise they get bored and/or assume we're not interested. It's nothing for them to move on the next girl. Many times it went right over my head when a guy was in fact chasing me, it just wasn't very obvious. So they figured I was not interested and moving on was no problem for them. So I finally figured out, the real challenge is to chase them, but in a way that makes them THINK they are chasing us! It really works!
Author SouthernT Posted May 30, 2007 Author Posted May 30, 2007 where ever....unless it is the bedroom you're wrong, I WILL follow to the bedroom. Just not "STRAIGHT" to the bedroom. We must make a "detour" first.
hope1975 Posted May 30, 2007 Posted May 30, 2007 Funny to see this thread right now...I've lived with my roommate almost a year now, but finally made a huge move the other night and he was into it. There ended up being some major messing around...since then he's been a total sweet heart to me. I was the main initiator but he was happy to play along. But we haven't talked about it since, and nothing else has happend since...but I think he sees me differently now, in a good way. Plus I have him wondering, because I haven't brought it up yet. I think guys like the challenge, they just don't want to work too hard to get it...really it's the women that end up doing the work, because we are the ones who have to give out the right signals, otherwise they get bored and/or assume we're not interested. It's nothing for them to move on the next girl. Many times it went right over my head when a guy was in fact chasing me, it just wasn't very obvious. So they figured I was not interested and moving on was no problem for them. So I finally figured out, the real challenge is to chase them, but in a way that makes them THINK they are chasing us! It really works! ahhh I agree...i know a couple & when asked how they got together the guy said "i chased her & chased her & chased her, until she caught me"
Author SouthernT Posted May 30, 2007 Author Posted May 30, 2007 ahhh I agree...i know a couple & when asked how they got together the guy said "i chased her & chased her & chased her, until she caught me" interesting.......by a woman NOT showing interest to a man, he ends up getting himself caught up with a girl and she ends up getting what she wanted all along......who would have known.....
alphamale Posted May 30, 2007 Posted May 30, 2007 It's really sad that the world is just one giant playground for men and that they use this behavior to define themselves as "MEN". It's a waste of time and you screw over sooooo many women who have beautiful hearts. Men and women screw each other over at about the same rates I would guess. As a self-defence mechanism maybe people decide to take the role of screwer instead of screwee.
monkey00 Posted May 30, 2007 Posted May 30, 2007 Well...one thing's for sure, if a guy has never noticed X girl at his workplace/class, or knew she even existed. Im sure the girl has ways of getting the guy's attention, or at the very least show him that she does indeed exist .
GodofNietzsche Posted May 30, 2007 Posted May 30, 2007 SouthernT, do you really want to understand or do you want stupid, superificial answers that lead you nowhere, but confirm your preconceived notions? Read the Second Sex by DeBeauvoir. Seriously. Woman is the inessential other, the means by which man affirms himself. Women are merely reduced to the level of objects, yet women gain advantages from this. They gain secuirty, safety, and power from the notion that they are sexual objects. Both men and women are complicit in this game.
Author SouthernT Posted May 30, 2007 Author Posted May 30, 2007 SouthernT, do you really want to understand or do you want stupid, superificial answers that lead you nowhere, but confirm your preconceived notions? Read the Second Sex by DeBeauvoir. Seriously. Woman is the inessential other, the means by which man affirms himself. Women are merely reduced to the level of objects, yet women gain advantages from this. They gain secuirty, safety, and power from the notion that they are sexual objects. Both men and women are complicit in this game. Interesting point. I will have to check out that book. Of course I want to understand, because I am honestly hoping that my preconceived notions are false. That was my whole point in starting the thread, to get a better understanding. This is discussion forum....there is no one "RIGHT" answer. It doesnt make any one person's answer "stupid" or "superficial". Thanks for the book refferal.
Green Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 Sure ive been on the hunt. I like to look at it more as fishing I wait for the fish to bit and then its my job to hook them befor I can really reel them in. I may just throw it right back, maybe take a few picture with the fish, even might keep it and cook it but Im not going to mount every one of them up on the wall. I used to play no games, be absolutely sweet, and it got me no where with women. Then I learned by watching guys who got girls and wow it was pretty easy. First off be very complementary and warm in the begining and always be slowly pulling back. next pick your batles you can tell when a girls giving you the all clear for landing signals dont waste your time on blocked run ways. Thirdly have damn good time doing it, and put yourself as number one. When you get tired of the girl say something like " My job transfered me to Florida, this sucks". and voi la there ya go gum shoes.
halfarock Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 First off, chasing women has little to do with proving my manhood, my masculinity, or any thing like that. Rather it is how I entertain myself and certain women. Secondly, typically when I very first meet a woman I can tell if she likes me and if we will get along, or not. So, from that point of view the chase is over before it even begins. But, if I just took home every woman that I met that liked me, well that would be down right boring. So, I meet a woman, actually I eye her from across the room talking with a group of people, but she keeps looking over at me. I start towards her, she sees me coming and excuses herself from her friends and meets me half way. We begin to talk, there is an instant ease of communication between us. I like her greatly. So what do I do? I leave. I meet her again, almost 2 weeks later. How did I know where to find her? When we first talked she happened to mention, “yea, me and my friends hang out there all the time”. She’s thrilled to see me again. I’m thrilled too but I keep my cool. Later on she asks if I want to get fresh in the corner. Well yes, but that was too easy so I ignore her question. We flirt, we talk. She says,”You are the sweetest man…. But then you probably already knew that, didn’t you?” “Well, yes, but I have to go. We hug, we kiss and I’m gone. Third meeting, she greets me with a hug, squeezing me tightly. We flirt, we talk. Again she makes advances though less so than last time. I ignore her advances, but she keeps putting her hand on my thigh. We agree to finally go out. We hug, we kiss and I’m gone. Now I am falling for this woman, yet I have made no advances to her, other than by just hanging out with her and have ignored all advances that she has made. So now my mind is racing, what is it that I can say or do so that she knows that I like her without actually saying that to her. I settle on making a little drawing for her – a little flower, just about to bloom. Actually I’m very good at drawing so it is no big deal. On our big date she is thrilled to see me. I try to play it cool but my smile keeps giving me away. I give her the drawing. She is ever so happy. Next date, she brings homemade brownies.
DanielMadr Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 Girls dress up, put makeup and shake their azz. Once you start to chase them, they start running. Girls can do some serious zig-zagging. It is impossible to catch them if they dont want to. If they run too far it is good idea to stop or slow down and let them come closer again. And dont hesitate when you are close enough to catch them
Pink Amulet Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 Next date, she brings homemade brownies. This is the second time in just a few days I have heard reference to this... Sounds like I need to learn to make browines before I come to the US if I am going to get me a man
LoveLace Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 Men spend a lot of time figuring how to get the girl. "First off be very complementary and warm in the begining and always be slowly pulling back. "- KMT The part they seem to struggle with is keeping a girl. Of course if they are just using her for sex or ego boost, then they don't care; but that aside, men don't seem to realize that even once you get the girl, the chase can't stop there. You can't just complement us in "the beginning", etc. Once the challenge is met, guys have the tendency to act as though their work here is done and now they have the girl, time to sit back and chill....sorry guys but that can't work. We continuously want and deserve to be treated like we're special (long as you really think she's special...don't fake it); not to say that guys don't deserve the same. It's just how we're wired...without a regular reminder that you think we're great, sexy, whatever, we'll get bored and we don't stick around just because of your studly looks. If your slacking on the special attention that we need, your driving us right into the arms of a dude that makes you look lazy. There is the chance that even the new guy won't hold water...but the point here is, guys need to step up and stop thinking that all we need is to be charmed in the beginning, then you got us wrapped around your finger...noooo I dont think so!
LoveLace Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 ...should add that the above post only applies to the girls who like the flowers and mushy stuff..some women aren't comfortable with any mushy stuff...
Author SouthernT Posted May 31, 2007 Author Posted May 31, 2007 Men spend a lot of time figuring how to get the girl. "First off be very complementary and warm in the begining and always be slowly pulling back. "- KMT The part they seem to struggle with is keeping a girl. Of course if they are just using her for sex or ego boost, then they don't care; but that aside, men don't seem to realize that even once you get the girl, the chase can't stop there. You can't just complement us in "the beginning", etc. Once the challenge is met, guys have the tendency to act as though their work here is done and now they have the girl, time to sit back and chill....sorry guys but that can't work. We continuously want and deserve to be treated like we're special (long as you really think she's special...don't fake it); not to say that guys don't deserve the same. It's just how we're wired...without a regular reminder that you think we're great, sexy, whatever, we'll get bored and we don't stick around just because of your studly looks. If your slacking on the special attention that we need, your driving us right into the arms of a dude that makes you look lazy. There is the chance that even the new guy won't hold water...but the point here is, guys need to step up and stop thinking that all we need is to be charmed in the beginning, then you got us wrapped around your finger...noooo I dont think so! Took the words right out of my mouth. Don't start the chase and then get lazy with it.
Topper Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 I dunno, this sounds so complex... Just be yourself and if there's chemistry baby, it will burn. This is the best post on this thread !
Topper Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 Men spend a lot of time figuring how to get the girl. "First off be very complementary and warm in the begining and always be slowly pulling back. "- KMT The part they seem to struggle with is keeping a girl. Of course if they are just using her for sex or ego boost, then they don't care; but that aside, men don't seem to realize that even once you get the girl, the chase can't stop there. You can't just complement us in "the beginning", etc. Once the challenge is met, guys have the tendency to act as though their work here is done and now they have the girl, time to sit back and chill....sorry guys but that can't work. We continuously want and deserve to be treated like we're special (long as you really think she's special...don't fake it); not to say that guys don't deserve the same. It's just how we're wired...without a regular reminder that you think we're great, sexy, whatever, we'll get bored and we don't stick around just because of your studly looks. If your slacking on the special attention that we need, your driving us right into the arms of a dude that makes you look lazy. There is the chance that even the new guy won't hold water...but the point here is, guys need to step up and stop thinking that all we need is to be charmed in the beginning, then you got us wrapped around your finger...noooo I dont think so! The same can be said for that great guy. If you as woman don't treat him right he can be out the door. Relationships aren't a oneway street. In the long run, It's about mutual respect and admiration.
serial muse Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 Men and women screw each other over at about the same rates I would guess. As a self-defence mechanism maybe people decide to take the role of screwer instead of screwee. There's a lot of truth to this. I dunno, this sounds so complex... Just be yourself and if there's chemistry baby, it will burn. Yeah!! The same can be said for that great guy. If you as woman don't treat him right he can be out the door. Relationships aren't a oneway street. In the long run, It's about mutual respect and admiration. Also one of the best posts on this thread!
LoveLace Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 We continuously want and deserve to be treated like we're special (long as you really think she's special...don't fake it); not to say that guys don't deserve the same. --- I noted in my post that guys deserve the same...but the thread discusses men chasing women so I was only writing from that aspect. Of course I know relationships are not a one way street, of course I know men have to be treated well too, but I was explaining from the woman's perspective that some men only chase in the beginning but once they have the girl they are just sord of "there". Once a relationship is established, women expect the charm to continue...men want to be treated well too of course but they don't expect or need it to the extreme that women normally do. A man can be happy with the simple fact that she is there...unless she does something extreme such as cheating on him...it just seems like it takes a lot more for a man to start feeling unhappy...for a woman it doesn't take much, unfortunately.
Topper Posted May 31, 2007 Posted May 31, 2007 A man can be happy with the simple fact that she is there...unless she does something extreme such as cheating on him...it just seems like it takes a lot more for a man to start feeling unhappy...for a woman it doesn't take much, unfortunately. I can tell you that most men will not be happy just because she is there. At least not for the really long term. Men have their emotional needs just like woman do. Guys want to feel that they are also special in her eyes. Yes some guys will keep her around because she is beautiful or sexy or whatever might be his turn on. If other emotional needs are not being met, sooner or later he will emotionally move on. woman are more open about asking that their emotional needs are met. For whatever reason men find it hard to express that need. It does not mean the need is not there. It very much is there. Like I said it isn't a oneway street.
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