peace_pipe Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 So I have been "dating" this girl for a few weeks. We have made out a few times, but now things have diminished some on the physical level. I don't really want to be just friends with this girl. I guess that is kind of what she wants at the moment. So here is my state of mind: I don't really want to be "just friends" with this girl . I am not sure if I even want a relationship with her. She is cute and I wouldn't mind taking things up a notch. She apparently doesn't want to as she is standoffish about becoming attached. Her response was "maybe someday". Of course I said I will be sure to mark it on my calendar. So, I kind of feel like I am wasting my time. I don't particularily care to have girls as just "friends". I never really have done this before. Do any other guys have this stance? I will certainly be civil to her if I bump into her, but I don't really want to continue hanging out. Now we do have a lot of fun when we hang out - but I figure I could be out instead meeting someone who is on the same page. I basically do not intend to call her anymore. I am sure she will call me again and I am not backing down on the physical part. I will keep dropping little sexual hints until she either gets tired of it or gives in. I do like making new friends but I know from past experience that with girls and guys it never really works and then one of them often disappears anyway once they find someone else. What do you'll think? Can you be just friends with girls when you just want to bang?
oppath Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 Yes, I can be friends with girls I just want to bang, as long as that desire is purely physical attraction. And I am friends with girls who I "could" desire romantically but didn't reach that stage or shut my feelings off because they were already involved, or I was, etc. If I've had any physical intimacy with a woman, being friends is kind of tough. It will take a period of space before it could happen, and you having found someone else. So know, I don't think you can be friends with this girl. Your posts about her are all yes, no, yes, no, back and forth. My take is that you are open for a relationship right now, and you know this girl is not, at least with you, so you figured ok, maybe we can just fool around, but she's not really giving you that either. In this situation, it's best to just let her go. You can be friends later, not right now. You'd only be getting crumbs of what you otherwise want. Let her go until you don't want any piece, let alone a crumb.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 25, 2007 Author Posted May 25, 2007 Yes, I can be friends with girls I just want to bang, as long as that desire is purely physical attraction. And I am friends with girls who I "could" desire romantically but didn't reach that stage or shut my feelings off because they were already involved, or I was, etc. If I've had any physical intimacy with a woman, being friends is kind of tough. It will take a period of space before it could happen, and you having found someone else. So know, I don't think you can be friends with this girl. Your posts about her are all yes, no, yes, no, back and forth. My take is that you are open for a relationship right now, and you know this girl is not, at least with you, so you figured ok, maybe we can just fool around, but she's not really giving you that either. In this situation, it's best to just let her go. You can be friends later, not right now. You'd only be getting crumbs of what you otherwise want. Let her go until you don't want any piece, let alone a crumb. I don't intend to be friends with her now OR later. If she wants to bang, we can make it happen and see where it goes. Otherwise - NEXT! I know she will call me again. When she askes to come over I am going to ask her if she wants a piece of ass. If not, she had better find something else to do.
jcster Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 When she askes to come over I am going to ask her if she wants a piece of ass. If not, she had better find something else to do. Nice. Well good luck with that. I'm sure it will be very rewarding.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 25, 2007 Author Posted May 25, 2007 Nice. Well good luck with that. I'm sure it will be very rewarding. Well, after a month of hot and cold from her - it hasn't turned out to be very rewarding anyway. So it's time for her to crap or get off the pot. At least I might get some sex out of her, because in my opinion, that's about all she is worth at the moment.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 25, 2007 Author Posted May 25, 2007 I believe I deserve a woman who is sure of herself and knows what she wants. This girl has dicked me around long enough to her accord. It's payback time as far as I am concerned.... Who in their right mind calls/sees someone of the opposite sex everyday, after they have fooled around but does not want to be physical? Nonsense.... I am sure some sap will come along and kiss he tail just because she is hot, but it won't be me.
Star Gazer Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 I believe I deserve a woman who is sure of herself and knows what she wants. This girl has dicked me around long enough to her accord. It's payback time as far as I am concerned.... Who in their right mind calls/sees someone of the opposite sex everyday, after they have fooled around but does not want to be physical? Nonsense.... I am sure some sap will come along and kiss he tail just because she is hot, but it won't be me. This is an entirely immature response to her indecisiveness. Payback? Nice move there, buddy. I am not sure you "deserve" ANY woman with that sentiment. You cannot be FRIENDS with someone who you ONLY want to "bang." A friendship is based on mutual respect, trust, and understanding. You have none of these things here.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 26, 2007 Author Posted May 26, 2007 This is an entirely immature response to her indecisiveness. Payback? Nice move there, buddy. I am not sure you "deserve" ANY woman with that sentiment. You cannot be FRIENDS with someone who you ONLY want to "bang." A friendship is based on mutual respect, trust, and understanding. You have none of these things here. What did I do that was so bad? I removed myself from the situation... I gave her the best side of me since we met, up until this. I treated her with respect. After a while, all the little inconsistincies start adding up and in my mind, she is not worthy of any relationship with me at the moment. I don't hate the girl, she's just too young for my tastes. I had to test the waters though. However, you are right, she wants to be my "friend". She also wants to be every other guy's "friend" as far as I can tell. She also wants to be my lover, then not, then maybe not. I have an idea: Let me wine and dine her while she decides...... NOT Now off to buy me a Saab 9-3.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 26, 2007 Author Posted May 26, 2007 This is an entirely immature response to her indecisiveness. Payback? Nice move there, buddy. I am not sure you "deserve" ANY woman with that sentiment. You cannot be FRIENDS with someone who you ONLY want to "bang." A friendship is based on mutual respect, trust, and understanding. You have none of these things here. What's the worst that will come out of this anyway? Maybe she will learn what it is that she wants and know how to respond to it when it happens again. It just won't be with me unless she suddenly decides that she wants to rock my world. And even then, she would have to do a lot.
fallendisguise Posted May 26, 2007 Posted May 26, 2007 No offense, but she probably already knows what you want from her - that's why she isn't giving it to you. Why sleep with someone who's going to crap on you? She probably realized it half way through and that's why she's inconsistent. She wants to be friends because she has fun with you, but isn't going to get physical with you because you have no motive to be with her.. just "get back" at her. It's not something that is easy to hide.. no matter how respectful you were to her. So no offense, just my opinion. I'm sure you can find someone else who is looking for a FWB situation....
Author peace_pipe Posted May 26, 2007 Author Posted May 26, 2007 No offense, but she probably already knows what you want from her - that's why she isn't giving it to you. Makes no sense. And sex is bad WHY? I did not start out perceiving her this way. My original intent was to date her and see if something develops because of a genuine interest. After her lies and inconsistencies and a better understanding of who she is, I don't have a lot of respect for her. Myself, I enjoy intimacy and sex, if it happens. Her, she apparently has some mental issue - why does it have to be my problem? It doesen't. But she is hot, therefore, I would bang her. But only bang.
serial muse Posted May 26, 2007 Posted May 26, 2007 I gave her the best side of me since we met, up until this. I treated her with respect. Oh, come on, you did not. You had an ulterior motive the whole time, you never really offered her friendship or anything like it; so she's on to you now and has backed off because that motive is now oozing from your pores, since you're tired of keeping it in your pants. Nice. Hopefully all that angling and finagling, hoping to "bang" someone, isn't actually the the "best side" of you, but I suppose you know yourself best.
fallendisguise Posted May 26, 2007 Posted May 26, 2007 Makes no sense. And sex is bad WHY? I did not start out perceiving her this way. My original intent was to date her and see if something develops because of a genuine interest. After her lies and inconsistencies and a better understanding of who she is, I don't have a lot of respect for her. Myself, I enjoy intimacy and sex, if it happens. Her, she apparently has some mental issue - why does it have to be my problem? It doesen't. But she is hot, therefore, I would bang her. But only bang. Sex isn't bad..it's a great thing. But I for one wouldn't want to have sex with some guy who only sees me as a piece of a**. He doesn't need to marry me, but at least respect me and my feelings. So as a woman, if I knew I was going to get myself into a sexual situation with someone who doesn't have respect for me, then why bother cuz I'm just setting myself up to get hurt. So if she's lied to you and you found that she isn't the person you thought she was why sleep with her? Why not find someone else to be intimate with who you actually like as a person? I'm sure if you bang her once, you'll bang her again and before you know it she has feelings and you don't like her and end up hurting her. It's not your problem, but I think to intentionally use her to have sex and get back at her is not good. And just because she doesn't want to have sex doesn't mean she's mental... she's using her head. I don't know the whole story, so I could be wrong.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 26, 2007 Author Posted May 26, 2007 Oh, come on, you did not. You had an ulterior motive the whole time, you never really offered her friendship or anything like it. Yep, and I am sure you know better than me why my motives were. I am not looking for women "friends", sorry not my cup of tea at this juncture in life. Perhaps if I were gay that would be acceptable. Sorry if I won't belittle myself by allowing her to string me along. The responses I have heard so far are about HER wants, HER needs, with no mention of my own. I had a genuine interestin her and she turned out to be an attention whore, so now she gets to be treated like one. It's really simple but I don't expect you to understand.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 26, 2007 Author Posted May 26, 2007 Sex isn't bad..it's a great thing. But I for one wouldn't want to have sex with some guy who only sees me as a piece of a**. Once again, I did not approach the situation as such initially. [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]He doesn't need to marry me, but at least respect me and my feelings. [/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]When do my needs come into the picture here?[/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][FONT=Verdana][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]So if she's lied to you and you found that she isn't the person you thought she was why sleep with her? [/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]Because last I checked I still enjoy sex with attractive women. [/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][FONT=Verdana][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]Why not find someone else to be intimate with who you actually like as a person?[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]Sounds good in theory, but hard to practice. Have you tried dating women lately?[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][FONT=Verdana][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]I'm sure if you bang her once, you'll bang her again and before you know it she has feelings and you don't like her and end up hurting her. [/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]If she would come out of her land of make-believe world, perhaps I could respark a genuine interest in her.[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]But, you do have a point. Her whole issue with the physical thing is afraid of becoming attached. [/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=black][FONT=Times New Roman]Well, I don't know about you, but I kiss and be physical with girls I am dating.[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR]
serial muse Posted May 26, 2007 Posted May 26, 2007 Yep, and I am sure you know better than me why my motives were. I am not looking for women "friends", sorry not my cup of tea at this juncture in life. Perhaps if I were gay that would be acceptable. Sorry if I won't belittle myself by allowing her to string me along. The responses I have heard so far are about HER wants, HER needs, with no mention of my own. I had a genuine interestin her and she turned out to be an attention whore, so now she gets to be treated like one. It's really simple but I don't expect you to understand. Prolly not. Here's what's simple: she didn't want what you wanted (to wit, straight-up banging, no friendship) and now you're badmouthing her for it and getting pissy. That's why people are talking about her wants - because your post blamed her for having wants that were different than yours, and people actually thought you might understand that if they pointed it out to you. Just because friendship is not your cup of tea doesn't mean it isn't hers, and she has a right to what she wants too without getting called all sorts of names for it.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 26, 2007 Author Posted May 26, 2007 Sex isn't bad..it's a great thing. But I for one wouldn't want to have sex with some guy who only sees me as a piece of a**. Once again, I did not approach the situation as such initially. He doesn't need to marry me, but at least respect me and my feelings. When do my needs come into the picture here? So if she's lied to you and you found that she isn't the person you thought she was why sleep with her? Because last I checked I still enjoy sex with attractive women. Why not find someone else to be intimate with who you actually like as a person? Sounds good in theory, but hard to practice. Have you tried dating women lately? I'm sure if you bang her once, you'll bang her again and before you know it she has feelings and you don't like her and end up hurting her. If she would come out of her land of make-believe world, perhaps I could respark a genuine interest in her But, you do have a point. Her whole issue with the physical thing is afraid of becoming attached. Well, I don't know about you, but I kiss and be physical with girls I am dating. Otherwise, there's not much point.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 26, 2007 Author Posted May 26, 2007 Prolly not. Here's what's simple: she didn't want what you wanted (to wit, straight-up banging, no friendship) and now you're badmouthing her for it and getting pissy. Again, you're telling me what I wanted. Where is your crystal ball? Is your real name Cleo? I wanted someone to date and last I checked that included becoming friends. It also usually includes physical aspects. It also helps to have a woman who knows what she wants, and not living in a land of make believe. I have every right to badmouth her just as she has her right to do whatever she wants. She's an attention whore, immature, and spoiled. Now let's screw.
alphamale Posted May 26, 2007 Posted May 26, 2007 What do you'll think? Can you be just friends with girls when you just want to bang? you'll notice PP that the guys who get laid the most are also the ones that have no female "friends". Girls aren't around to be "friends" with...they are here to give you sex and then make you a nice breakfast afterwards.
Author peace_pipe Posted May 26, 2007 Author Posted May 26, 2007 you'll notice PP that the guys who get laid the most are also the ones that have no female "friends". Girls aren't around to be "friends" with...they are here to give you sex and then make you a nice breakfast afterwards. Hell yea.... But seriously, I wouldn't go that far.... I don't mind making breakfast from time to time but otherwise my sentiments exactly. I needed you sooner. I was wondering when you would show up. Now let's go grab all of are female "friends" and watch Brokeback Mountain.
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