princess75 Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 Hello, my divorce has not taken place yet, but.. spiritual one has...or so I guess, I cannot reachout to him: his heart is sooo closed. I wonder, why he had to put a wall in between us. I was wondering, how to reach out to him, when he doesn't want to. Partially emotional abuse in terms of neglect was there....but partially love. ?How can we know when to get out or when to "keep on fixing it" How to love after being hurt? My husband doesn't even pick up the phone, he says he wants divorce, not filed yet. Calls me to tell me he is divorcing...when the phone rings and I see it is him, I become happy thinking maybe...he now cares...he now understands... but, have a wall on the other side. He was loving before,now he says he made up his mind. Tell me, can this be reverted? Am I crying over a dead horse? And, how long to wait...is it better I do the divorce myself? Advice.
sumdude Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 You'll have to just accept what he is saying... I feel for you but your life will go on. Start worrying about yourslef and not him. Start moving on with your life.
sumdude Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 You'll have to just accept what he is saying... I feel for you but your life will go on. Start worrying about yourself and not him. Stop contacting him for a month, let him go. Start moving on with your life. Paperwork can wait a month or longer. Use that month to heal yourself and prepare for your future. He's not the only man on the planet.
polywog Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 Painful as it is, somedude is right. You just have to accept it and be extra kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve, go through all the stages of grief. Divorce is like a death of a dream, but you'll get through it. Get yourself into therapy to help yourself. I went through a divorce 12 years ago, and it was a very hard thing, but I got through it, better and stronger. Read all the great threads of others in the Divorce thread of LS for strength and affirmation. And just post away...LS is a lifesaver. So many great, wise people.
ilmw Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 Painful as it is, somedude is right. You just have to accept it and be extra kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve, go through all the stages of grief. Divorce is like a death of a dream, but you'll get through it. Get yourself into therapy to help yourself. I went through a divorce 12 years ago, and it was a very hard thing, but I got through it, better and stronger. Read all the great threads of others in the Divorce thread of LS for strength and affirmation. And just post away...LS is a lifesaver. So many great, wise people. AGREED...
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