randuff Posted May 17, 2007 Posted May 17, 2007 I went to the therapist today and talked to him about today being the 1yr anniversary of my proposal date to my ex of 4 years. I felt good after leaving his office and now that I have come here I have a decision to make. I can A) keep moping around feeling sorry for myself because my girl (who cheated on me numerous times) left me and I can't get her back. or B) I can move on with my life, meet new people, enjoy my kid, enjoy myself, work out and get in better shape and feel better, and still not get her back.... I have come to the conclusion, after 20 days or so, that I want to live MY life, not live the life that I used to have and WISH what could be. I cannot change the past, I can only forge a new future for myself for the betterment of myself. I am writing this down to remind myself everyday that it will get better and she is NOT the center of my world. She wants to still be friends but she screwed that up by betraying it in the past..... Maybe one day I can look past all that and be her friend but not now, not any time soon......
LoveisPAIN07 Posted May 17, 2007 Posted May 17, 2007 I'm glad you've decided to move on. I remember when I first came to the conclusion that I was never going to get him back, it hurt so badly. But then I had to tell myself that even while we were together, he caused me so much pain through his dishonesty, etc. that it wasn't worth it. It's funny to me when ex's that have treated us horribly still want to be friends. It's irritating to me when people that have ****ed you over want to be your friend, as if it's their choice and not yours.
CaliGuy Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 Happiness is a CHOICE. You can choose to be happy or you can choose to be miserable. Life truly is what you make of it. This old adage I love: "Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I deal with it." If you choose to be happy, you will.
Author randuff Posted May 19, 2007 Author Posted May 19, 2007 So I am going along the day happy as can be, just getting back from the grocery store spending $200.00 !!!! And I get a text message from my Ex... She was asking me about some car business tax stuff (we are both in the business) and I called her back to explain how to back the taxes out, blah blah blah..... Anyways I let her go and was kinda rude so I text her back saying sorry I was rude it is just a bad day for me. She responded it will get better and I said not today it is the 17th... She said Oh, sorry to which I responded no you aren't... Now why the heck did I bother saying this??? She proceded to tell me she doesn't want me out of her life and she hasn't moved on and it hasn't been easy for her.....I responded by saying can we really be friends? Can either one of us handle seeing the other with someone? To which she said no, not right now. All this does is screw with my head.... I was fine all week til she text me and I break down and call/message back. I shouldn't respond to her texts but I feel so compelled to do so and I don't understand why. I know it won't work out and I know that this is for the best but why is the hurt and pain still lingering. I just wish there were a button that I could push to turn the feelings I have for her off, completely! This is torturous at times for me. I go days without having the urge to "need" to talk to her then she texts me and I jump to help her!!! ARghhhhhh, Sorry guys/gals I just needed to vent for a few R PS I started working out this week and feel good about it (even though I wince in pain from soreness ) After 4 years of taking care of someone else I am finally doing so for myself.
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