faire l'amour Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 In short you give her your 100% undivided attention.. no looking at other people walking by the table.. she wants to feel as if you really want to be there with her.. enough said! in a nutshell!
Trialbyfire Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 The deathly chest stare. Dealthy 'cause that's your last date with her...
DanielMadr Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 EXACTLY!!! I completley agree with you here. For as long as I can remember, I was told that it actually turns a guy off when a woman does this. But the problem is that men have gotten lazy because women a so aggressive these days. So guys think all they have to do is kick up their feet, relax and let the women do the work. And what happens guys? What happens is that you miss out on the one girl that is dreaming about the day that you will actually approach her and ask her out. Problem is that women are afraid to approach and it is mans job to do so but your job is to make it easy for him or at least dont confuse him. Yes or No. No flaking, no games, no maybe. If you want to be pursued more, fine but go on dates and give some honest feedback. Reality is guys do pursuing and girls play hard to get. Guys pursue more. Girls see them as desperate. Guys got dumped. Thats what he was talking about 'dont pursue more'. When you sit on your azz and dont have any initiative and giving no feedback, dont be disapointed when things go a way you dont like - him loosing interest, him being desperate. Simple as that. Only men who know how to conquer this are the experienced (have lots of options) ones and unless you are very, very attractive they wont bother with you for long. My advice: Dont be desperate, be a little indiferent, dont care if you get her, dont tolerate disrespect, make the date fun not a dating ritual, make moves but dont pursue too hard (two calls and then Next her) - you snooze you loose. No hard feelings towards girls who rejected you or towards yourself.
DanielMadr Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 The deathly chest stare. Dealthy 'cause that's your last date with her... Chest grab usually works the opposite.
Trialbyfire Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 Chest grab usually works the opposite. I'll try that next time on my next date. He might be concerned though...
DanielMadr Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 I'll try that next time on my next date. He might be concerned though... Yes you could try to fondle yourself, that could make him concerned. I meant that grabing girls boobs is better than staring on them all night long.
Trialbyfire Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 Yes you could try to fondle yourself, that could make him concerned. I meant that grabing girls boobs is better than staring on them all night long. Since I've had my own body since I was born, there's nothing of interest on it, for me. I was talking about taking your advice and grabbing his chest area. I think he'll be shocked because it's not my normal demeanor. Now, back on topic, if a man chooses to have a conversation with a woman's chest area, remember, there will be no verbal responses. They neither hear or speak. The best way to communicate with a woman is to look at her face and preferably, for me, look into her eyes. It's a form of politeness and a great way to get a connection.
che_jesse Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 You sound like this one particular group of friends that I used to be close to but now don't really speak to very much anymore. This is why: They are all single, and sometimes single people that have been single for a while get into this stupid mindset where they treat "dating" as its own thing. They start to nitpick and develop "strategies" and pay far to much attention to every single move/look/conversation with members of the opposite sex. You can usually identify yourself as such a person when you hear yourself say something like "I don't understand what happened with this girl/guy they seemed totally into me and she even said <insert something completely meaningless that people say 100 times a day such as "Oh you like hiking? I LOVE hiking!"> I thought she/he really wanted to see me again." The problem is that such people end up finding other such people to date, nothing of course ever comes of it because you have two people that barely even notice the actual person that they are with and instead focus on "dating". They then get upset and bitch to all their other friends when nothing ever comes of their relationships and quite frankly we are sick as **** of hearing about it all the time. Anyway, OP, stop thinking about "dating", act like an actual human being that other human beings might want to spend time with doing something more interesting then answering "safe personal questions." And no matter what you do never again use the direction that a woman points her toes as an indication of how she feels about you.
SouthernT Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 They then get upset and bitch to all their other friends when nothing ever comes of their relationships and quite frankly we are sick as **** of hearing about it all the time. Wow....was that necassary? All of us come to this forum to learn the dating process. It takes people time to learn the things that you mentioned in your post. Tone it down a bit.
GregsBad Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 Anyway, OP, stop thinking about "dating", act like an actual human being that other human beings might want to spend time with doing something more interesting then answering "safe personal questions." And no matter what you do never again use the direction that a woman points her toes as an indication of how she feels about you. Thanks Che - now things make more sense to me. See - I read a book (mabe the OP read the same book). So then, I was talking to a girl at a club. She touched her hair, looked me in the eyes and pointed her feet at me. So I patted her ass. Turned out that she wasn't really that in to me.
Trialbyfire Posted May 18, 2007 Posted May 18, 2007 Exactly. Nevermind hard and fast rules about how to tell if the girl or guy is so into you. Eye contact and actions should be screaming at you. Most of you understand when someone is flirting with you through body language. Keep in mind that each person flirts in the way that works for them and some don't flirt at all. The look in their eyes is enough to tell you what's going on in their minds.
Author PhineasG Posted May 19, 2007 Author Posted May 19, 2007 Thanks for all the quick, specific responses! Frankly, I only posted b/c I was exhausted and frustrated, and I needed to get all that negativity off of my chest. I've been relaxing and doing whatever I feel like for the past couple of days, and I feel a lot better. I actually saw a girl on Friday and, rather than try to act calm and cool, just said whatever I wanted and just goofed around with her in the city. Even if I don't see her again, I had a pretty fun time! I'm going to maintain that positive attitude: not so much to get a partner, but rather for personal contentment.
GregsBad Posted May 19, 2007 Posted May 19, 2007 Exactly. Nevermind hard and fast rules about how to tell if the girl or guy is so into you. Eye contact and actions should be screaming at you. Most of you understand when someone is flirting with you through body language. Keep in mind that each person flirts in the way that works for them and some don't flirt at all. The look in their eyes is enough to tell you what's going on in their minds. I agree. But do some guys approach this as some applied science??? Maybe over analyzing things??? NOT ME!!! NEVER!!! Well may there are one or two things I've analyzed, and figured out, that sort of helps me ... I need what ever advantage I can gain. Because, I've tried to just not care ... but can't stop caring. For example ... Like when a girl looks my way, then turns away, not looking back ... that does NOT mean she's NOT interesed. Do NOT be afraid to approach. (just wait a little while before making a move) I now know this for a fact ... I wish I learned it sooner But here's my theory on this phenomenon ... Unlike guys, most girls won't take a second look ... because it's too un-cool ... girls are way more stealthy than that. Girls see enough out of their peripheral view, early on, and if what they see is worth a quick "direct look", she'll get plenty of "confirming" info with that one and only direct peek. But don't assume it means "go away". If a guy does assume it meant "go away" and then goes away ... then she just thinks, "hmmm ... wussy ... his loss" It doesn't matter if my theory about the "why" is correct. The important thing is - a guy should not let that "tun away" scare him away - the next move - or the next non-move is yet for him to make. But I do believe he should wait some time before noticing her again ... before making a move. The wait, and not looking back at her, is important. Especially if she wonders why he didn't look back sooner, then his chances are huge! But that's another story. So is am I right? Or is this analysis paralysis?
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