Kathleen2260 Posted May 16, 2007 Posted May 16, 2007 My boyfriend and i have been together several years. We are talking about marriage but there are some small events that have happened that bother me. I was reading about passive-aggressive people and am worried my boyfriend might be passive aggressive. Or maybe I am just making a big deal out of nothing. Sometimes he will say things and then if I get upset he will say "I was just joking/messing around, why do you take everything so seriously?" But I dont' think he WAS joking because he didnt smile or laugh when he said it which is what I would do if I were just kidding about something. Another thing is a few years ago we went skiing with one of his friends and a girl his friend was dating. Actually his friend wasn't even dating this girl but they were all lovey dovey and sweet to eachother. The friend's girl and I hit it off right away and she wasn't a good skier and neither was I so we stuck together. Whenever my boyfriend was around he barely spoke to me, never touched me or kissed me but his friend and his girl were all hugging and kissing eachother and the girl actually asked me if my boyfriend and I were dating or just friends (she couldn't tell) I told her we were living together and had been dating for a few years. When we went to leave my boyfriend was walking fast, ahead of me and I couldnt' keep up, meanwhile his friend and the other girl were walking close holding hands. I had to stop to tie my boot and my boyfriend just kept walking. His friend actually had to tell him to stop because I wasn't next to him anymore. In the end he admitted he felt he had to "babysit" me and didn't have any fun (even though he only skied with me down ONE hill) because I wasnt a good skier. Is all of this passive aggressive?
MissKissNada_Gal Posted May 17, 2007 Posted May 17, 2007 passive aggressive maybe. but u cant just lable all uve described into two words. its either that, hes in the relationship with u playing games, or maybe hes tired of u or loosing interest? idk but i wouldnt be living with a guy whose "passive agressive: if thats wut id have to deal with
Krytellan Posted May 17, 2007 Posted May 17, 2007 *facepalms* After years of dating these things are bothering you??? What, did you attempt to find real reasons not to marry him and fail?
Lezbean Posted May 17, 2007 Posted May 17, 2007 That is not passive-aggressive. He was irritated with you. I think passive-aggressive people are hilarious! I used to have a secretary that was one. They say or act one way to your face and then do something sneaky that is harmful. She would act all helpful and then hide things from me like the credit card statements hoping I wouldn't pay them on time, causing trouble etc. Or, like a wife who acts like she is helping her wheelchair bound husband and then he "accidently" rolls off a cliff.
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