Summer2000 Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 If I can give anyone on this website advise, I will tell you right now, that if you and your guy/girl broke up, do not go back to them ever! As it will never be as it once was... We all sit back and wish we could get back with our ex's, but why? They break our hearts and we want them back??? Come on now.... If they hurt you once they will hurt you again, I promise you that.... Good luck everyone
Great Gazoo Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 Hey summer I remember you, sorry things didn't work out but it is probably for the best. I hope your doing alright otherwise and feeling better about yourself.
Author Summer2000 Posted May 14, 2007 Author Posted May 14, 2007 The way I see things is, I am done trying to please others.. I am just going to worry about myself and others can either deal with it or walk away.. I am done thinking with my heart.. I am just glad I know that I will NEVER give that man the time or day again.. Thats a promise
Island Girl Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 If I can give anyone on this website advise, I will tell you right now, that if you and your guy/girl broke up, do not go back to them ever! As it will never be as it once was... We all sit back and wish we could get back with our ex's, but why? They break our hearts and we want them back??? Come on now.... If they hurt you once they will hurt you again, I promise you that.... I can second this - having been the dumper, and then dumper again, several times over.
Great Gazoo Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 I am sorry you have been through all that, I remember how hard it was on you the last time. Your strong, stay strong and you will get through this. Whats that saying, what does not kill us makes us stronger.
Author Summer2000 Posted May 14, 2007 Author Posted May 14, 2007 Oh yeah, and when you are sitting back crying over this man/woman and thinking about how nice it once was, just think about how crappy this person makes you feel now.. Don't give that person the satisfaction of knowing how much they hurt you and how you want to work things out.. I know from 1st hand that I was willing to change everthing about me to get back with my ex, and there was nothing wrong with me.. Its them that has the problem, so when they come crawling back to you, witch they always do, tell them to kiss your as@ as you are done with the childish games. If this person really loved you, then why is it that you are sitting back feeling like crap? Don't give that person the time or day, as they will end up breaking your heart once again.. Trust me
Trialbyfire Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 Summer, I don't know your past situation but it's not always this way. If the issues aren't insurmountable, sometimes it's worthwhile to try again if both people are mature enough to put the necessary effort into it. Not everyone's situation is the same as yours, therefore each person needs to evaluate if the situation is pure poison or salvageable.
krzr Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 trialbyfire is right on this one. every situation is different.
maay Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 hey summer! hugssss its been a long time i have posted anything here.. things good and bad for me and now is worst. i am sorry that things doesnt turn well for you either.. but i am glad that you have become strong... you are damn right that "Don't give that person the satisfaction of knowing how much they hurt you and how you want to work things out.. " i have learn this and learned it in a hard and tough way. its gonna be difficult and painful, but we will get over it and have a brand new start! meet someone who deserves you and not keep hurting you! i will do that too. takecare my dear friend... Oh yeah, and when you are sitting back crying over this man/woman and thinking about how nice it once was, just think about how crappy this person makes you feel now.. Don't give that person the satisfaction of knowing how much they hurt you and how you want to work things out.. I know from 1st hand that I was willing to change everthing about me to get back with my ex, and there was nothing wrong with me.. Its them that has the problem, so when they come crawling back to you, witch they always do, tell them to kiss your as@ as you are done with the childish games. If this person really loved you, then why is it that you are sitting back feeling like crap? Don't give that person the time or day, as they will end up breaking your heart once again.. Trust me
CaliGuy Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 Oh yeah, and when you are sitting back crying over this man/woman and thinking about how nice it once was, just think about how crappy this person makes you feel now.. Don't give that person the satisfaction of knowing how much they hurt you and how you want to work things out.. Well that comes with self-confidence and self-respect. Never let them see you sweat, true dat. I know from 1st hand that I was willing to change everthing about me to get back with my ex, and there was nothing wrong with me.. This is the core of why second chances fail. Because so many people are trying to change for the wrong reasons. Changing for them will never work. Changing for you though will. Its them that has the problem, so when they come crawling back to you, witch they always do, tell them to kiss your as@ as you are done with the childish games. I believe it takes two to tango and two to make a break a relationship. The only thing you have control over is yourself. You can't change them, you can't fix them and you certainly can't carry on a relationship alone. Focus on yourself and where you need to improve and let the chips fall where they may. If this person really loved you, then why is it that you are sitting back feeling like crap? They might have at one time or another but, just like that song says. "If you loved me you'd be here with me." Actions always speak louder than words. Pay little attention to what they say and a LOT of attention to what they do. Because what they do tells you exactly where their heart is. Don't give that person the time or day, as they will end up breaking your heart once again.. Trust me The only people who can break your heart are those who you allow. I am not saying that there are not liars or manipulators out there. But if you pay attention to red flags, if you are confident and have self-respect you'll be better able to weed those kind of people out of your life well before you get hurt.
Author Summer2000 Posted May 20, 2007 Author Posted May 20, 2007 This is where I become confussed.. I sent my ex this e-mail a few days ago.. [FONT=Comic Sans MS][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][COLOR=#800080][FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]I guess I want to say a few things to you.. So please just know this is all coming from my heart.. [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]I want to say thank you for coming over and being with me all day yesterday, that meant a lot to me.. It felt really good to have you hold me.. That means more to me then you even know.. [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]I am sorry I made you feel ****ty yesterday, I never want to see you sad, it hurts me to see you in pain.. I guess right now I am just not happy, and you know why.. But in all reality you know how I feel about you/us.. so I want to say thank you for being understanding with me.. [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]No matter what happens with us, you will always have a piece of my heart, and I can't say that about just anyone.. You are very special to me, you are one in a million.. [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]I miss you already, but I know I need to move on with my life.. I can't keep letting my heart hurt over you as I will never have what I want/need with you.. [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]You are one of my best friends, and I love you to death, I would do anything in this world to make you happy..In so many ways you hold the key to my heart.. But, I know what you want as you have made it clear to me.. Now, its up to me to accept that.. Maybe the grass is greener on the other side... [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]So I guess what I am telling you is, I will always be here for you, but I will not wait around for you either.. I have no intentions on dating anyone anytime soon, but I also know I need to live my life... [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][sIZE=2][COLOR=#000000]I love you Jamie, and I wish you the best.. Please know that this all came from my heart...[/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#000000]This is what he responds.. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][COLOR=#000000] [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][sIZE=2][COLOR=#800080][FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]i really don't know what to say about what you have said here, but i know this:[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]* i'm sad when you're not around[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]* i feel a pain in my chest when i think that you and i are "done" and i don' like it[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]* you love me for all my faults...no one else ever has.... that's gotta mean something.[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]* i'm comfy with you like i've never been with anyone else...that's gotta mean something[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]* i miss seeing you pull into the driveway, i get happy just knowing we get to spend the next few hrs. on the couch watching t.v. and snuggling[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]* i never thought for one second the "grass is greener on the other side"[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]* i may be confused about where i stand in life and about what i want right now, but i was never confused about you being the greatest thing that ever happened to me.[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif] [/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]....for whatever it's worth, you're simply........ the best.[/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif] [/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif] [/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]What should I think of this? And now he has been calling me everyday or sending me a text message telling me that he misses me and is thinking of me.. [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif] [/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif][COLOR=#000000]What should I do??? [/COLOR][/FONT] [FONT=arial, helvetica, sans-serif] [/FONT] [/COLOR][/sIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][/FONT] [FONT=Arial][/FONT] [/COLOR][/FONT]
loverboy89x Posted May 20, 2007 Posted May 20, 2007 oh dear....this is exactly what im going through with my girlfriend ive just got back with her and now i know im going to hurt...but for the last time im promising myself. i care about her to much to keep it going, in fact i wish i could take it all back, but i cant i just have to deal with it i think!
Tormented Posted May 20, 2007 Posted May 20, 2007 If I can give anyone on this website advise, I will tell you right now, that if you and your guy/girl broke up, do not go back to them ever! As it will never be as it once was... With my recent encounter with the ex...just couldn't pass this one up! You're absolutely right about the relationship never being the way it was before the breakup. When hurt/anger/betrayal, etc, takes place, how could it be? But then, changes occur in every relationship...regardless if there was a breakup and reconciliation, or if a couple remains together for a long period of time. People change, and with that, the relationship will change. Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse...but relationships NEVER stay the same as they did in the early days. Having said that, I think going back to an ex is a very risky move. Awkwardness, mistrust, loss of feelings - they all come into play during the course of reconciliation. It takes STRONG love and a LOT of patience for it to work...something many lack. Many go back, expecting the relationship to pick up where it left off...very unrealistic, especially so if there was a long period of time between the breakup and reconciliation. But even more so if there was betrayal, lying, cheating, or hurtful words exchanged. Takes a long, LONG time for trust to be regained in a case like this, if ever. And good chances are, if your ex did this to you the first time - they will do it again. I started a thread about my recent contact with the ex. I found it awkward, but also therapeutic. I now know he's completely out of my system...just a man I USE to love, nothing more. For the first time since I've known him, I was able to look at him and see him for who he REALLY is...and to be honest, it wasn't pretty! And over and over again I kept thinking..."What the hell was I thinking?" Nothing like time and self-reflection to put things back into perspective. No, I could never go back to my ex. He's just not the man I thought he was and for the first time in 9 months I feel completely free. I'm dating now - met an interesting man who I click well with but it's still in the early stage, so we'll see! - and I'm once again enjoying life. I'll never forget the good times I shared with my ex, but they are now mere memories instead of obsessions. Personally, I think going back to an ex is a mistake. It only prolongs the inevitable...a final breakup and a much larger heartache down the road. Just my 2 cents worth.... ~T~
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