nicki Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Just curious. I've had this happen with several boyfriends. They wanted me to dress sexy EVERY time we went out. They bought me tons of stripper looking tops and wanted me to wear them constantly. I felt like a barbie doll, "slutty barbie." Why do some guys want their women to dress like this? I like to dress like this once in a while, but not all the time. What gives? Do guys like us when we are wearing a tee shirt and jeans, or a nice silk nightgown instead of the whole garter belt get-up?
rainfall Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I'm not a guy so I could be wrong, but I think maybe it makes them feel kind of macho to be seen with you. You look hot and you are "theirs" so when other guys check you out it boosts their ego. I could be way wrong on this though because like I said I am not a guy.
hardcase Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Just curious. I've had this happen with several boyfriends. They wanted me to dress sexy EVERY time we went out. They bought me tons of stripper looking tops and wanted me to wear them constantly. I felt like a barbie doll, "slutty barbie." Why do some guys want their women to dress like this? Guys like that just want a trophy girlfriend under their arm. I don't like my wife, or past gf's, to look slutty. Only time I want my wife dressing like that is when we are in private. Not saying she can't dress to look damn good...but when she wants to look like a sex object...it better only be for me in the bedroom.
Author nicki Posted May 11, 2007 Author Posted May 11, 2007 Thanks, Rainfall! It could be something like that, I guess, if they thought I was hot...that's funny to me, though! I'm very "girl next door." It's just a lot of pressure. You know what I mean? I felt somewhat objectified and like who I naturally was just wasn't good enough.
Pyro Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Just curious. I've had this happen with several boyfriends. They wanted me to dress sexy EVERY time we went out. They bought me tons of stripper looking tops and wanted me to wear them constantly. I felt like a barbie doll, "slutty barbie." Why do some guys want their women to dress like this? I like to dress like this once in a while, but not all the time. What gives? Do guys like us when we are wearing a tee shirt and jeans, or a nice silk nightgown instead of the whole garter belt get-up? IMO, either of these possibilities: -just his personal preference -wants to make other guys jealous, which will give him an ego boost IMO, dressing sexy is nice for the right occasion but not every single time.
chill chic Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Just curious. I've had this happen with several boyfriends. They wanted me to dress sexy EVERY time we went out. They bought me tons of stripper looking tops and wanted me to wear them constantly. I felt like a barbie doll, "slutty barbie." Why do some guys want their women to dress like this? I like to dress like this once in a while, but not all the time. What gives? Do guys like us when we are wearing a tee shirt and jeans, or a nice silk nightgown instead of the whole garter belt get-up? take it from me...it's purely for their ego and out of disrespect for you. if you're lookin' for just a fun time with these guys..then so be it..but if you're looking for a genuine, loving, lasting relationship it's the wrong idea and you'll be hurt from it..like I said, take it from me, I've been there before..as a trophy object.. and still getting over that fact..and it doesn't matter how much confidence you have..in the end..you will still feel down on yourself for subjecting yourself in that manner.
Author nicki Posted May 11, 2007 Author Posted May 11, 2007 Thanks, Hardcase, Riddler and Chillchic! You guys are right. It's all about an ego thing, a trophy girlfriend for public display. It's okay once in a while, but disrespectful to expect it all of the time. I like what you said, Hardcase, about only wanting that in private. I feel the same way. I'm a little wild privately. But I don't put that out in public. It's special, just for me and my guy. Really, the whole deal just made me feel sleazy. Chillchic, these WERE relationships, not just guys I dated a few times. That's why it bothered me so much. It just seemed....superficial, and sleazy. (Like talking dirty in bed EVERY time, and never making sweet tender love, once in a while,too. You know what I mean?)
Lizzie60 Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 but indoor only... for a hot evening/night... You wouldn't catch me on the streets with 'slutty' clothes... It looks cheap and slutty... If you are not comfortable wearing the clothes they get...simply don't wear them... period. No man decides what I will be wearing.. if they get me clothes they have to know the type of clothes I wear... not what they want me to wear.
Yamaha Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I would question their sincerity to you. As a guy you might like your gal to look sexy sometimes so others can see what they have but it would be sometimes not all the time. It is disrespectful to you.
Author nicki Posted May 11, 2007 Author Posted May 11, 2007 Yeah, Lizzie. I should have never worn that stuff in the first place. But I thought it would be fun once in a while, and it would be left at that. It would have been fine if it had been a once or twice a year deal. Just to be different. Now, I won't wear anything like that again!
Author nicki Posted May 11, 2007 Author Posted May 11, 2007 That's a good way to put it, Yamaha! "Sincerity." It makes me miss an old boyfriend who never bought me lingerie because he said he loved me most naked....ah, the good old days. Oh, and both of the tramp loving exes wanted me to get a tatoo as well!
Lizzie60 Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Yeah, Lizzie. I should have never worn that stuff in the first place. But I thought it would be fun once in a while, and it would be left at that. It would have been fine if it had been a once or twice a year deal. Just to be different. Now, I won't wear anything like that again! There is sexy and there is slutty clothes... Sexy can be classy. but if they get the 'slutty' stuff...then NO.. don't wear it. I believe that if women wouldn't give men so much power we would be in a much better world, with a lot less violence towards women. Women allow men to abuse them... but that's another topic... Be strong and independant!
alphamale Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Just curious. I've had this happen with several boyfriends. They wanted me to dress sexy EVERY time we went out. They bought me tons of stripper looking tops and wanted me to wear them constantly. maybe they were watching too many rap videos?
Tangerina Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I think it is totally personal taste. My boyfriend laughs and thinks I am silly when I dress up. He sees all the primping and preening girls do as really trivial and shallow and part of his attraction to me is based on the fact that I don't buy into it. When I do bother with that stuff he gives a little head shake (in a friendly 'oh you' way.) On the other hand, I have an ex who always bothered me to dress goth... if you knew me you'd laugh at that concept, I'm more the bubbly happy half hippy half rocker half just me type.
roxy_1980 Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Some guys have feelings on inadequacy. They feel if their gf is all dolled up and other guys are looking at the girl that they have, they are better than them somehow. Frankly, it's just a bunch of childish BS to me.
alphamale Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I have an ex who always bothered me to dress goth... were you dating marilyn manson? Some guys have feelings on inadequacy. They feel if their gf is all dolled up and other guys are looking at the girl that they have, they are better than them somehow. Frankly, it's just a bunch of childish BS to me. not only that but they forget the sexy dolled-up chicks are the ones who get hit on more often by the competition...
DanielMadr Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I once went out with a girl who is stunning beautiful and on top of it she dressed "slutty" on this one occasion like very, very small shorts and sexy tops. Interesting thing is she is not slutty at all, quite the opposite. Pretty insecure and shy. Anyway what I noticed when I let her go a few steps infront of me on one occasion in departement store: 1) Nice azz 2) Guys eyed her ok but it was those creepy side looks like you dont want to be catched looking. I realized its much better to look, smile, wink or dont look at all. 3) Girls eyed her with this nasty look or even with open mouth or with "I dont believe it" look and then when they were behind her they went APESHYT. So funny:D 4) Nice azz I havent told her to dress like that and I didnt expect it, b/c she behaves very shy. She was mybe compensating something, a bit attention wh0re I think. Im OK with jeans and T-shirt. It is sexy. Strippers tops and skirts or shorts 5 sizes too smal are too much. On the other hand....on a beach its OK to go almost naked. So I wouldnt judge so fast. I agree with you that wanting to dress up your partner like porn star every time you go out is a bit weird. These guys are probably that type of a guy who in few years will get high watching their girlfriend or wife doing it with someone else. Jealousy is also bad but I think its more healthy and natural to be a little jealous than to present her almost naked to other men.
kepners Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 ok, the first few times i go out with a new woman, she gets the looks. then after that i dont care what she wears... to a point mind, if shes out without me and shes dressed like a whore acting like whore... then i have questions. but on a whole, i would ever have a problem or ask her to dress up, i mean i love a woman looking her best, but when shes not with i have to ask questions, but on a whole its not a problem.... UNLESS shes coming home to see my MUM! then WOMAN WEARING BUTTONED UP TOPS. hahahahaha its an attention thing, and with women are with me, i get ALOT of attention all the time! EVERYWHERE I GO, its because i am twice as big as you! in every direction, and people look and want to know me. hehehehe
sb129 Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Nicki, don't you feel a little mad that they are attempting to control what you wear? I mean, I know its nice they buy you stuff to wear etc, but if my BF was doing that on a regular basis I would assume he doesn't like my style and is trying to change it, and that would be a big red flag to me. You can be sexy without being classy, and my BF thinks I look as good in my pyjamas as I do in a nice dress.... I don't understand the type of guys who do this.... it would really be a turn off for me.
DanielMadr Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 EVERYWHERE I GO, its because i am twice as big as you! in every direction, and people look and want to know me. hehehehe You have bigger boobs?! Wow.
DanielMadr Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 You can be sexy without being classy, and my BF thinks I look as good in my pyjamas as I do in a nice dress.... Pyjamas with Snoopy character beat Victoria Secret anytime.
sb129 Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Actually, the pyjamas don't stay on for long...but you get my point
DanielMadr Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Actually, the pyjamas don't stay on for long...but you get my point Its called 'prefering easy access to estetics' You should be at home dressed in a pink ribbon around your neck and piercings.
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