quankanne Posted May 10, 2007 Posted May 10, 2007 Every time I see a girl with a nose piercing... I think about boogers. I think about chunks of skin falling out, however, I'm diabetic, so those kinds of things worry me. What if it doesn't heal properly? What if the dye causes and infection because of my condition? Silly things like that ... I know it's the trend right now to mark one's body to appear sexier, but my thought always has been to wait it out – say 3-4 months – and see if she still feels the same way about wanting to do something so extreme. She might decide that yes, it's what she wants, she might decide that it would work against her in certain social or work circumstances. During that meantime, have her research into it, so she has a fuller understanding of the physiological effects piercing would have on her body ... And have her talk to someone 10-12 years older than her to find out how they've coped with the piercings and the questions/comments made by others. It might open her eyes, or it might make her dig her heels in more, but at least you will have the satisfaction in knowing that she's done her homework on the subject. however, I've always found that a crying mama is a wonderful motivation to play things straight!
sb129 Posted May 10, 2007 Posted May 10, 2007 These things aren't a symbol of uniqueness or individuality anymore. I see them as a symbol of that person's inability to stave off peer pressure. If EVERYBODY jumps off a cliff, it doesn't mean you're anything special if you join them 'jumping off the cliff'. You know, DDL... I think I'd see if I could find some photographic evidence of 'piercings gone wrong' and email them to her. A picture is worth a thousand words, right? A big purple tongue or an juicily infected lip might give her some pause. Word. I have had both my nose and my eyebrow pierced but not at the same time. I quite liked my nose piercing, it looked OK with a tiny little stud in it, but it got infected and really hurt, so I wouldn't get it done again on that basis. My eyebrow piercing (got it when I was 19, and my dental school made me take it out 9 years ago), is one of my biggest regrets, because I have thin eyebrows, and like them shaped, the scar is visible. Its not a bad scar, but its there, and I hate it. As a dentist, I have seen some pretty disgusting things relating to oral piercings which have put me off for life. I have seen tongue/lip and cheek piercings get infected and have to be surgically removed. I have seen people get piercings ripped out, making scars ten times worse. Mouth piercings can damage the teeth, chipping them and wearing them down. As well as the risk of scarring and infection, you can't be sure that the piercist won't puncture a nerve or a blood vessel. I know they have regulations, but the mouth is such a complex part of the body, I would be reluctant to put anything unneccessary thru its structures, and I know the anatomy well. You also run the risk of being exposed to HIV or hepatits C if the piercist hasn't followed cross infection and sterilisation protocol. I know I sound like an old fuddy- duddy, but I am a classic case of a "rebe"l who did the piercing thing, and regretted it later. And I have my professional experience to draw on now too. At 19, I didn't know or care about any of this. Not sure if I would even have listened to anyone... maybe I would have- nobody presented the facts to me straight, my mum was devastated. Sigh. Hope it works out.
mrmaximum Posted May 10, 2007 Posted May 10, 2007 Well DDL, there is a lot to think about here. I know that getting a piercing and a tattoo is a method of young'uns individualizing themselves. I personally had my navel pierced and I have 6 tattoos. HOWEVER, because of the constant shifting of paradigms (Extreme => fringes, Fringes => Norm, Norm => Passe) we now have piercings in more and more 'different' places. This is just me but I agree with Ladyjane, getting a tattoo nowadays isn't making you stand out in the crowd whatsoever. if one wants to do that, DON'T get one!! As for piercings, the nose isn't too bad, but anywhere else is somewhat harsh. I hope that helped somewhat. This isn't somethng that she should take lightly!!
alphamale Posted May 10, 2007 Posted May 10, 2007 A job stopper or door closer... excellent terminology ART
burning 4 revenge Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I agree with some of the comments above. Facial piercings were fierce and rebellious in the Seventies and Eighties Remember Vivyan from the Young Ones ? Somewhere during the Nineties they went mainstream and got played out. I think pop culture has tried to associate them with sexuality, but there's no substitute for natural good looks. If these kids are doing it for self-expression there has to be a million better ways to do that. Maybe start a half-way decent rock band, the world needs one now. When I see piercings and tatoos I see lack of imagination.
Storyrider Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I agree with some of the comments above. Facial piercings were fierce and rebellious in the Seventies and Eighties Remember Vivyan from the Young Ones ? Somewhere during the Nineties they went mainstream and got played out. I think pop culture has tried to associate them with sexuality, but there's no substitute for natural good looks. If these kids are doing it for self-expression there has to be a million better ways to do that. Maybe start a half-way decent rock band, the world needs one now. When I see piercings and tatoos I see lack of imagination. I remember a girl in school around 1984 getting her nose pierced and it was SHOCKING. Now, a pierced nose is like the equivalent of what a polo shirt with the collar turned up meant back then. You are trying to fit in.
alphamale Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 If these kids are doing it for self-expression there has to be a million better ways to do that. they are doing it to 1) get attention and 2) cause all their friends say its "cool" and 3) to piss of their parent(s)
tanbark813 Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Piercings aren't necessarily people trying to be rebellious. They can be a style choice, like what jeans you like or what kind of shirt you prefer to wear. Everyone has their own preferences when it comes to what they like to wear. Do you pick your clothes because you're trying to fit in or because you like how they look on you? Personally, my piercings were for the latter. I imagine I'm not the only one in that regard.
Author dropdeadlegs Posted May 11, 2007 Author Posted May 11, 2007 Thanks to everyone who took the time to educate me, comiserate with me, tell me to try to understand, share their experiences, and make me feel better. Today it doesn't feel as shocking as it did yesterday. I was hearing this revelation and projecting the future safety pins, dog collar-like studs, and ear-to-lip chains. In other words imagining the worst case scenario of this being the first of a metal raged trend. We did not talk about it further as the day was pretty full for both of us. I will ask her to give it some more thought. I think maybe I'll just let her read this thread because there is so much information, advice, and concerns shared by so many. She is an artsy type and seems to feel that her body is a blank canvas of expression. I agree that it's more "lemming" like than "different." It's HER body and I have no real say so as to what she does with it. She turned 18 in February and could have already done this if she wanted to. I had fully expected a tongue piercing by now as she used to ask me to sign for that but I refused. I will encourage a waiting period. I appreciate all the responses. I really do feel better about this and not nearly as emotional.
alphamale Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I think many of these kids with piercings and tats are just slackers. Many of them are probably into drugs and stuff. Did you know that the US comprises 4% of the worlds population yet it consumes almost 70% of the worlds illicit drug supply??? These tats and piercings feed into that whole drug sub-culture.
Tangerina Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 alphamale, that's just silly and you know it. Why do otherwise tolerant-of-all-sorts people feel like they somehow have the right to judge people with piercings? Piercings are old news and aren't a big deal anymore, they aren't a sign of being a criminal lowlife, just of growing up in the 90's and being comfortable with that sort of fashion. PS, like I said, I totally agree with Tanbark and my piercing isn't about fashion and rebellion, it is about looking how I like to look, and believe me, I'm not trendy or alternative, I'm just me and I'm pretty freaking wholesome. Also, piercing ears is just as extreme of an act from a body modification standpoint as getting one of the low risk facial piercings but no one has a problem with it SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY ARE USED TO IT!! It isn't inherently different and it is ignorant to say that if someone wants a different piercing they must be messed up or trying to show off or some drug fiend.
Tangerina Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I live in a house with 5 girls. I have ears and nose pierced. D has ears and nose pierced, N has multiple ears pierced, J has ears and tongue and a tattoo, H has nothing but wants a few ear piercings and guess what, we are one ridiculously wholesome household between the knitting club and Nintendo parties, yup, real lowlifes.
alphamale Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 alphamale, that's just silly and you know it. Why do otherwise tolerant-of-all-sorts people feel like they somehow have the right to judge people with piercings? because they look like idiots. i was somewhere once and some 18 yr old girl who was the cashier had like 20 piercings all over her face, in her lips, nose, eyebrows, up the ears and god knows where else. she looked like a total fool. and i could tell she was a druggie also.
Art_Critic Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I had an employee years ago that went thru a tough a time in her life.. divorce.. starting her life over.. She was an artist at my company and did her job well.. she got one tat and a belly button piercing. The tat was not visible... during the next two years she continued to have trouble in her life and continued to cover her body with tats and piercings.. We would no longer allow clients to come in and sit down with her at her computer as it was embarrassing for our company.. She wound up leaving after a breakdown so we never really truly had to deal with her on that issue.. It was sad to watch a beautiful woman ruin her body while she was having a tough go of it in her life. Today she has a full body suit including her neck and is unemployable.. We do 3d graphics and have many Artists and Artsy people working for us and some do have tats and piercings.. all NOT visible. Our clients are all not Artsy and some don't understand the Artist mind or freedom.. We try and have a very freedom rich environment for our workers but sometimes we have to draw the line when it can effect the bottom line and accounts.. This obviously is something taken to the extreme.. but I thought I would share..
alphamale Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 This obviously is something taken to the extreme.. but I thought I would share.. that was a good story ART about the pitfalls of this type of body modifications. i don't see any of these kids with tats and piercings attending law school or med school or working at IBM. most of them end up in the military or working fast food.
tanbark813 Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 i don't see any of these kids with tats and piercings attending law school or med school or working at IBM. most of them end up in the military or working fast food. *raises hand* <--- Software engineer with visible piercings making 6 figures over here. I like how you guys conveniently overlook my posts in this thread.
Pyro Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 *raises hand* <--- Software engineer with visible piercings making 6 figures over here. I like how you guys conveniently overlook my posts in this thread. Unfortunately I think that you are in the minority. Generally speaking and from what I have seen, most of the people with an excessive amount of tats and/or piercings are more towards the lower class, but that doesn't mean that every single person who chooses to have that type of stuff is bad.
Art_Critic Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 <--- Software engineer with visible piercings making 6 figures over here. I like how you guys conveniently overlook my posts in this thread. Tan.. you are obviously working with a great company.. not all companys are like yours.. some even have published dress codes forbidding visable piercings. Did you have all these piercings in when you interviewed ? and do you interact with customers in person ?
alphamale Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Did you have all these piercings in when you interviewed ? of course he didn't ART...don't be silly
Art_Critic Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Having piercings and tats doesn't guarantee that you are going to be jobless and a drug addict.. I personally think all it does is limit your playing field... it narrows down your options.. There are millions of successful people out there that have body modifications.. I think the issue is that at age 18 before you have ever had a stable job and have no job experience you are most likely going to be judged on your looks and personality as you have no experience to fall back on... So having a visible piercing is going to have a larger effect on getting a stable job..Later on after a decent resume and experience are acquired then you have more than your physical looks to be judged on..
alphamale Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Having piercings and tats doesn't guarantee that you are going to be jobless and a drug addict.. It don't guarantee but it does increase the odds of being jobless & a meth addict. All these guys I see on Cops and To Catch A Predator have tats and piercings.
tanbark813 Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 Tan.. you are obviously working with a great company.. not all companys are like yours.. some even have published dress codes forbidding visable piercings. Did you have all these piercings in when you interviewed ? and do you interact with customers in person ? I take them out during interviews but they don't fire me when they see me on the first day of work with them in. All 4 companies that I've worked with since graduating college have been cool with it. My current job does require me to interact with clients and I do take them out for that. But my main point was that having piercings or tats doesn't doom one to a life of flipping burgers and minimum wage.
Storyrider Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 A humorous take on cause and effect with tattoos in England. http://www.city-journal.org/html/5_4_oh_to_be.html This guy is a great satirist with some real life experience.
Art_Critic Posted May 11, 2007 Posted May 11, 2007 I take them out during interviews but they don't fire me when they see me on the first day of work with them in. All 4 companies that I've worked with since graduating college have been cool with it. My current job does require me to interact with clients and I do take them out for that. But my main point was that having piercings or tats doesn't doom one to a life of flipping burgers and minimum wage. It sounds like you are an atypical wearer.. someone who cares about himself and respects his work ... We have an Artist working with us now that has been employed with us maybe 18 years.. When I hired him he was clean shaven, no ear piercings and his hair was short. About a mouth after he started he started wearing his ear piercings and grew a short beard and thruout the years his hair has grown almost to his butt.. He is good at his job and keeps his hair in a ponytail and looks acceptable at work.. Had I known this about him before or during the interview I would have never hired him.. What does it say ?.. I don't know.. He has made my company a bunch of money in those 18 years..
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