zilverenvlinder Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 So, my bf, Ben's, ex-girlfriend's name is Kairin. That's a really odd way to spell the name Karen... I mean, honestly, how many people do you know named Kairin? Which brings me to my next point... I let Ben borrow one of my video games and he has had it for a couple of months now. I haven't played it in awhile. I played it last night, and guess whose name was on the High Scores list... Yep. 'KAIRIN'. Ben quickly erased her name, didn't say a WORD, maybe didn't know that I noticed it, and wrote his own name in over hers. Keep in mind, this is MY video game and I let him borrow it. So, I asked him, "Hey...did you let any of your friends borrow my game?" "Nope." "So, it's been here the whole time?" "Yep." What?! I also know that one of his best friends is still good friends with Kairin, so if he had told me he had let HIM borrow the game, I would have understood seeing her name on the high score list. But...he said the game never left his house! Is that weird or what? Obviously she was at his house... and he never told me about it! Should I say something? Should I let it be? I really don't know what I'm supposed to do here... and it's not as if she's been calling him, because he broke his phone two weeks ago and hasn't gotten a new one yet. Weird?! Input please?
LoveLace Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 Yes I think you should say something. Tell him you saw him delete her name from the game. Remind him that he claims the game "never left his house", so ask him what he's doing with this girl. Just say, you can't blame me for wondering, she is your Ex, after all! So if he has something going with her, you deserve to know. If the situation was reversed, I'm sure he'd wanna know why you were hanging out with YOUR ex?
sweetbutcheeky Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 Hmm I wouldn't feel comfortable with finding that out, not only has she been to his house but he didn't tell you and was trying to hide it from you when you were playing the game. How long as it been since you saw that? Not sure if it's too late to bring it up, but it would have been best if you had said something about it at the time. It will probably bother you if you don't ask. I would ask if she was at his place, why he didn't tell you and why he erased the name so you wouldn't see it. Tell him you did.
Author zilverenvlinder Posted May 9, 2007 Author Posted May 9, 2007 You're right, I probably should have said something about it right then... like, "Who's Kairin?" very casually. The thing is, I'm not sure if he knows that I know about her... but I do. You would think if there was nothing going on then he would have said something... I think what I'm going to do is get my game back, and if I find her name on any more high score lists (because there's a high score list for every level), I'm going to say something. I also think it's weird, because he got really drunk the other night and said, "Are you cheating on me? Have you ever cheated on me? Just tell me... I don't care. Just tell me." Of course, I haven't and said No, of course not! but I think it's weird he asked. I also know very well the signs of cheating men, and he really doesn't fit into any of those categories... but he could be hiding it very well. I just don't want to be the overbearing, suspicious, nagging girlfriend that I was in the beginning... and we used to fight about it, too.
directx Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 How do you delete a high score? Most games don't allow you to. WHich game is it? There are a few game developers with the name Kairin (Kairin Miyamasu for one) and sometimes those are the default names. Which game is it?
Author zilverenvlinder Posted May 9, 2007 Author Posted May 9, 2007 It's Guitar Hero... and right after he beat a song her name showed up on the top scores, and I know Kairin is not a default name for Guitar Hero. That's interesting to know though, thank you.
directx Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 You know what I would do the more I think about it? I would continue to play the game without him knowing and put a high score up there with the name 'Kairen'. In fact, do this with other games as well. You will probably notice the name 'mysteriously' disappears. And if you both are there to witness the name, I would exclaim "What the hell is that doing there?!" He will think he is in the twilight zone. Oh what fun to be had!
annabelle75 Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 The fact that he hid it from you is very suspicious, but I wouldn't assume that just becasue she played the game he's cheated on you. He may just didn't want to tell you he was hanging out with his ex. I'd go ahead and just ask directly. Be honest and tell him what you saw. I'm also concerned about him asking you about cheating recently. Once upon a time I cheated on my partner and around that time I asked him if he had. In the back of my head I figured if he had it would justify what I did adn then I wouldn't have to feel bad about it or confess. Didn't work out that way though. Just go a head and ask him. Odds are it isn't as bad as what you're probably imagining.
Star Gazer Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 And if you both are there to witness the name, I would exclaim "What the hell is that doing there?!" He will think he is in the twilight zone. Oh what fun to be had! Holy sh*t, that's funny. I'd be waaaaaaaay suspicious.
jcster Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 I've only been cheated on by one person, and that person constantly made comments insinuating that I was cheating on him. It's a red flag that he asked, IMHO. I would definitely ask him about the name on the video game - I wouldn't be suspicious if he hadn't erased it so quickly. Or...you could do what directx suggests....that would be pretty funny!
sweetbutcheeky Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 I think what I'm going to do is get my game back, and if I find her name on any more high score lists (because there's a high score list for every level), I'm going to say something. I also think it's weird, because he got really drunk the other night and said, "Are you cheating on me? Have you ever cheated on me? Just tell me... I don't care. Just tell me." Only problem I see with that plan is though is that more time goes by since you saw the name and since he will be more on guard now he will probably erase the name before he gives it back. Also about when he was drunk. My gut tells me that he is feeling guilty about cheating and is asking you because if you had, so he wouldn't feel as bad.
LoveLace Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 I agree with all about him asking if you've cheated. The 1st thing I thought after reading it was, he asked because he's already cheated himself; hence why he said "I don't care if you did just tell me". He might have hoped you had a confession, to make a confession easier for himself. But yes this is a big sign that he has something for Kairin. I think the longer you wait to address it, the more upset you might get yourself over it. You should address it ASAP, in my opinion. You saw her name on the video game, and he asked you about cheating, I say that's enough grounds to go ahead and ask him what's going on right now. It already sounds like he might have something to get off his chest, so he's more likely to be honest than to lie about it.
directx Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 I almost this would happen to me because it would be my new hobby. I would use the name Kairen for everything! I would even ask him if we could go to her house to play games sometime! I'd make it the password to everything, screen saver, desktop image. Id hum a song with the name Karen in it (if they exist). Hell, go so far as to say 'I am really 'Kairen' about you!'. (I think I need to see a therapist)
underpants Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 I love some of directx's ideas. Dude, your mind is probably a wonderful and dangerous thing. I hate to say it, but I feel like your bf, obviously had this Kairen girl over and something inappropriate has happened thus the drunken attempt to clear his conscious. The whole hiding the name thing is not scoring him any points either. Here is something you could do. Print off (thus, no handwriting comparison) "KAIREN or however this chick spells her name WAS HERE" on a little piece of paper. Next time you are at his house put it on the fridge, or someplace out in the open but amongst a little clutter.... Then just ...notice it and say ....who's Kairen? Or, don't notice it and see if he removes it. He might even get falsely angry at the Karien chick. I don't know, this guy doesn't sound to good. This is going to fester until you get an answer. If he can't communicate about sensitive things with you that might be a flag you may want to consider for yourself. Anyway, give him hell.
Author zilverenvlinder Posted May 9, 2007 Author Posted May 9, 2007 LOL direct. That IS probably something I would do. Haha. I can psychologically f&*% his mind up... start writing her name all over the place, un-earth her photographs and set them casually on his desk... the guilt will eat him from the inside. Bwahaha. I can get the game back without him knowing. I can just slip it in my purse. If he says anything, I'll just say "It IS my game, after all, and my roommate wanted to play it". He IS being rather overly affectionate with me lately, too. I mean, it's nice, but he is probably trying to cover something. ARGH! The three seconds I saw her name, bright as day, up on that screen is just burning in my mind!
Mustang Sally Posted May 9, 2007 Posted May 9, 2007 DirectX, My Dearest, Your are truly a sick f*ck! Made me (seriously) laugh out loud in my office! Sally
directx Posted May 10, 2007 Posted May 10, 2007 He IS being rather overly affectionate with me lately, too. I mean, it's nice, but he is probably trying to cover something. ARGH! The three seconds I saw her name, bright as day, up on that screen is just burning in my mind! You are no dummy to take note of the over affection. He's worried. You know, if you like adventure games play something like Final Fantasy VII where you can rename the characters to what you want. Then, when they talk to your character you can read it aloud. The game lasts about 60 hours so the name will heard quite often. (I named my character 'I farted' so anytime the computer addressed my character, it sounded like the computer was announcing to everyone it farted. Needless to say, everyone got bored of this and resented me, which made it all the better. I never stopped laughing at it like an immature 12 year old. "Hey I farted! Where should we go next!")
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