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Posted

This could potentially be a novella but I will shorten it for the sake of readability.

 

*been with boyfriend for 4 years and got along well and got engaged about a year ago

*parents are very religious and somewhat controlling

*I didn't want a traditional ceremony b/c I lost a parent and it would be really hard. It was kind of a promise I made after the death and I don't want to go back on it

*Decided to have wedding the normal way anyway (meaning, nondestination, noneloping)

*parents had intervention with my fiance and insisted that we either hold off on the ceremony or break up because of my unresolved emotional issues with the death of my parent (this was 4 years ago and in my opinion I've been coping with it well, it's just this big event that gets me)

*they accused me of all of these bad things - angry, emotionally unstable, etc.

*fiance decided to come over and out of the blue delay the wedding because of my "issues"

*I am crushed, currently not knowing what to do. I feel betrayed and lost. I dumped him for a day but then we have been on rocky ground for awhile.

*our relationship was solid until the wedding thing came up. The traditional ceremony is hard for me and his parents are very rigid in their thinking.

 

Is there hope? or should I just let this one go? I love him in so many ways but there are issues and I feel unappreciated and betrayed by his actions when he delayed the ceremony. I don't knowif I can fully trust him again.

Posted

I think the biggest question is WHO'S parents are intervening and making these decsions ? If its his, and he is heeding their wishes, thats a caution flag. I have been with men who's families have basically ruined our relationship, and never allowed the guy to grow up and be a man.

 

If thats the case, he is putting his family ahead of you, and you need to watch out.

 

Sorry if I misunderstood the situation !

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Posted

yes, you've got it right. If you don't mind, could you expand on what happened to you personally? Or what could happen to me if you don't want to go into details? what were the warning signs?

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