Woggle Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 I was just thinking and I realized that my ex wife will be released from prison this fall and I must admit it has me more than a little concerned. Is there anything that I can do with the police to make sure that she doesn't come near me? She lives in the town next to mine so it's not like she is right down the street but she is obviously insane and I am worried that prison might have just pushed her more over the edge. I am worried about my safety and my wife's safety. I can't even begin to explain the guilt I have for getting her caught up in this mess. I had no idea my ex would go this far but still my W is saint for sticking by me. The mortgage is also almost paid on my house and I am starting to like the Jesrsey Shore so I don't want to move. Do I have any options to make sure that she stays the hell away from us?
bab Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 I'm sure that you could get a restraining order issued, but that's just a piece of paper if she decides to get violent. Yikes, I don't really know. Aside: Whatever happened to you two moving to California?
Author Woggle Posted May 6, 2007 Author Posted May 6, 2007 I'm sure that you could get a restraining order issued, but that's just a piece of paper if she decides to get violent. Yikes, I don't really know. Aside: Whatever happened to you two moving to California? We discuss that but we both have careers here and the house is almost paid off. Who wouldn't want to not have to pay a mortgage anymore? San Francisco is a great city but is to damn expensive. If we get a house there we will be paying it off for the next 30 years. If she tries something again though she should do much more time because it would be her 2nd offense. I also own guns and while I never ever want to have to use them in this manner I am willing to protect myself and my W.
amaysngrace Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 Does anybody she knows know where you live? Are you listed in the phone book? Is it going to be easy for her to find you?
whichwayisup Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 Are you close with any of your neighbours? Might be a good idea to show a picture of your ex to them, this way if they see her in the neighbourhood, near your house or anything, they can call the police. Also, talk to the police now while she's still in jail, find out about getting a restraining order against her. Make sure you have an unlisted phone number, if she has called you before on the number you have now, change it. That sucks Woggle.
amerikajin Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 We discuss that but we both have careers here and the house is almost paid off. Who wouldn't want to not have to pay a mortgage anymore? San Francisco is a great city but is to damn expensive. If we get a house there we will be paying it off for the next 30 years. If she tries something again though she should do much more time because it would be her 2nd offense. I also own guns and while I never ever want to have to use them in this manner I am willing to protect myself and my W. Woggle, is she getting out on parole or is she finishing her sentence? That could make a huge difference here. If she's getting out on parole, there are strict guidelines governing her behavior, and if she violates them just once, she goes right back into jail. You can file a restraining order - and if she's on parole, and if she violates that order, she's toast. Check to see what the stalking laws are in New Jersey. If she violates that, she could be up for a felony violation, and I would bet a fair sum of change that this second sentence would be even harsher than the first. Find out what the laws are, use them to your advantage. Don't relent.
Topper Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 Woggle, is she getting out on parole or is she finishing her sentence? That could make a huge difference here. If she's getting out on parole, there are strict guidelines governing her behavior, and if she violates them just once, she goes right back into jail. You can file a restraining order - and if she's on parole, and if she violates that order, she's toast. Check to see what the stalking laws are in New Jersey. If she violates that, she could be up for a felony violation, and I would bet a fair sum of change that this second sentence would be even harsher than the first. Find out what the laws are, use them to your advantage. Don't relent. Good advice here. get your ducks in a row now. that way when she is released you will havea game plan. have you thought of other parts of the country you could move to? Calif is expensive. But there are places that cost less and are great places to live. If you like the Jersey Shore you may also like living on the coast of North Carolina. or The Eastern Shore of MD. I use to live on Long Beach Island NJ. There are a lot of nice places all up and down the Jersey Shore. You could take all that equity you have in your home and put it into another home. You would have all the tax advantages and lower mortgage payments. You have options and some time to use those options.
amerikajin Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 You don't need to run away, Woggle. Hell, if she's really that nuts, then she can catch up to you eventually anyway. Best thing to do is just to prepare yourself as much as possible and deal with whatever comes up. My own personal belief is that she will probably have her hands full just trying to get readjusted to life outside of prison, and I doubt she would want to do anything that would immediately get her tossed back in the clink. But you are indeed wise to be prepared. See if she has parole terms, and see what your stalking laws are. You might want to talk to a lawyer and your local police department to keep them advised of the situation. They can advise you how to handle anything like this, and just follow their advice. Your best bet is to use the law to your advantage.
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