lifesuxohwell Posted May 4, 2007 Posted May 4, 2007 so. . . to make a long story --- kinda short. . . a couple of years ago my Mom died. At that time she sent me a letter basically telling me how much she disliked me. Two weeks later my husband told me that he had been having an email relationship with another woman for over a year, and that he had broken it off, but had told her that he loved her, etc. etc. etc. he said he didn't mean any of the things he said to her, that he loved me, was sorry. . . on and on. Oh yeah, and I'd been supporting us for YEARS while he was "getting himself together" - he still doesn't have a job. Two week after my husband dropped that bombshell on me, my daughter dropped the additional bombshell that he had touched her inappropriately when she was a teenager. My husband told her that I knew, WHICH I DID NOT!!!!!! This has got to sound like a complete scam, but I swear it isn't. My daughter hasn't spoken to me for a few years now. She won't let me see my grandchildren. She's told everyone she knows and all of the family, so I also lost my whole family. I've forgiven my husband. I know he's messed up, but I do believe in "for better or worse". This is waaaayyyy worse though than anything I every expected. I'm not OK. I try to think I am, but I'm not. I don't even know why I'm posting this other than I want to tell someone the truth, even someone I don't know. I wish my daughter would read it and recognize me. I miss her.
Author lifesuxohwell Posted May 6, 2007 Author Posted May 6, 2007 writing this spurred me to call my daughter - blocked the number so she would pick it up. begged her not to hangup. talked for awhile. it wass bad. now i don't know what to believe. she told me so many lies about myself and said things that i knew to not be true - now i doubt everything she said at all. i think i'm goin crazy - or already gone. i really had believed what she said before didn't think anyone would lie about something lie that - but she lied and lied to me about me!!! said i did and said and THOUGHT things that were just plain dead wrong. she's told other people this stuff, so others believe it of me too and it all lie after lie after lie. i want to just disappear forever.
happygirl70 Posted May 8, 2007 Posted May 8, 2007 Of all the things you wrote, I just can't get my mind around why your husband would tell her that you knew. What would motivate him to do that? Did he think that you really did know? I'm sorry, but if he knew that you had no idea, that is unforgivable. HE should be the one to contact her and apologize for saying such a horrid thing! I am so sorry that your daughter will not have anything to do with you and that your family has turned from you. Is there anything you feel you can do to fix things? DO NOT let the rest of your life go by without trying to get things straight with your family and with your daughter. If it means making a fool of yourself, then do it! If your daughter truly believes you knew, then she is very likely damaged by this misinformation. Find a way to make peace with her. As for your mother, that was wrong of her but there was something damaged within her for her to want to hurt you that way. As Jimmy Buffett says "breath in, breath out... move on". Don't waste one more moment thinking about it. YOU have to love yourself and wasting energy on that is pointless. Again, your husband. He really seems to not have your best interest at heart. You deserve better. Think about it!
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