He dumped me 4 no reason, Cheated and now I want revenge

[big_girls_rock]

It's officially over, my ex just broke up with me yesterday over the phone. The day before I found a messae he left for another girl and I talked to her about it and she showed me the messages that he had been sending her from before he and I ever met. She had split up with him the previous week and didn't want anything to do with him because of her intuition. My initial plan was to keep quiet but I let her know that I wasn't a good girl myself. Big mistake. She eventually went to him about our conversation and he called me 9 times while I was at school. I knew she had leaked, when he did get a hold of me, his explanation ( to cover his own ass ) was that I "hadn't been a good girl" which meant nothing, and that it was over, he was ignoring/blocking all my calls and etc. He eventually hung up on me and wouldn't pick up my calls. I was extremely pissed off. So steemed that I did the unthinkable. (call me crazy) but my ex had sent me dirty pics, conversations, and even made phone calls, all from his job. (stupid mistake) I honed his boss and sent (and I'm in the process) of sending him everything. Violating comany rules in the department of education is a big no, no.

Later the next day the (other woman) sent me other things of their conversation the day before. She questioned him (though I have no clue why because she said that she was "over" it) and he denied ever knowing, talking, or dating me. He even lied about his dating preferences concidering me. I finally got a hold of him to ask why he was denying me, and why he cheated etc. he wouldn't budge so I blackmailed him. All I wanted to know was why he did this 360 and why he felt that I deserved to be treated like this when I put so much into the relationship, including paying for a plane ticket and getting a job near him. He then tried making it seem like if I went through with sending his boss the rest of the information, I would be keeping a "man" from his daughter, and ruining his life. I just want revenge, yes karma is a bitch, whatever goes around comes around etc. I just don't want to wait. I think he deserves what he gets, even if it costs him his job. It was his decision to go against company policy. Not mine.

 

My question to you is (most of you will probably agree) Should I move on, stop the rest of the info from getting in his bosses hands? Or should I go through with it and ruin the hell out of his life? This situation could possibly (ok, the way his boss was talking) get him fired and cause him trouble with getting jobs (which he knows will happen) because they plan on doing an investigation which may cause him not to get his daughter (or so he says) Half of me wants to **** him over, he treated me so rudely, refused to explain his actions, and disrespected me. I know I'm blind sighted right now, but I want him to regret everything he's done to me. What do you suggest?

[krzr]

sounds like a bitter big girl on the loose..............karma goes both ways honey so think about that before u do anything.

[LucreziaBorgia]

Why is he away from his daughter now, and how would this prevent him from 'getting her'? Does he not have custody, and is trying to get it?

[cubbbb]

Ummmm, it kind of sounds like YOU are the one in the wrong here! You read messages that he sent this girl BEFORE he even knew you? You cheat on him, and "unfortunately" your cover was blown, and you try to ruin his job career? Yikes. I'd run from you as fast as I could.. No wonder, he wants nothing to do with you. Who the heck would?

[stillafool]

I'm curious, what astrological sign are you? No do not ruin his and his daughters life by sending any more damaging info to his job. Revenge is never the answer. Do the honorable thing every time and sit back and watch how he gets his payback. BTW, never believe the OW. Of course she is going to run to him with what you told her. It sounds like he was and is really hung up on this girl.

[big_girls_rock]

Ummmm, it kind of sounds like YOU are the one in the wrong here! You read messages that he sent this girl BEFORE he even knew you? You cheat on him, and "unfortunately" your cover was blown, and you try to ruin his job career? Yikes. I'd run from you as fast as I could.. No wonder, he wants nothing to do with you. Who the heck would?

 

lmao. No- read it carefully, HE was playing me the whole time. She showed me messages that he was sending her (they have been dating since BEFORE he met me and he has been dating her the whole time, including me) I wasn't a bad girl in the sense of cheating, I meant that as in I wasn't very submissive towards him, bad girl, get it? Your getting this all wrong. He cheated, got caught, his cover was blown, and he tried to cover his ass with her by breaking up with me.

[big_girls_rock]

Why is he away from his daughter now, and how would this prevent him from 'getting her'? Does he not have custody, and is trying to get it?

 

Yes, the mother does have custody. Apperently he is trying to get her back but if he get's fired from his job apperently that would look bad in the courts or something? He is probably just trying to use that to stop me from ruining his life like he did mine but I could see in some ways in which it could effect him from getting her. 1. Being jobless, and 2. If he tries to get another job they will know that he went against company policy.

[mental_traveller]

My suggestion is to just take your anger out on him directly - meet up and give him a piece of your mind if you must, or write a letter or email expressing your thoughts. Then just forget him and move on. It'll be far better for you in the long-run than this revenge plot of yours.

 

The trouble with getting serious "revenge" on someone is that they may well end up wanting to take revenge back. Are you sure you can handle him turning up at 2am, breaking into your house and slapping you around or worse? What about being stalked by him for years, having anonymous accusations sent to your work/family/friends...or later when you have kids, him calling social services and accusing you of child abuse? If you mess with someone's livelihood then some people are not going to take it lying down, they'll come after you in some way. Unless you are prepared for outright hostility for years on end, then generally it's not a good idea to make serious enemies.

 

If you absolutely insist on getting "payback", then at least wait 6 months or so, allowing you to get some perspective. That way you avoid doing something crazy and will be more calm about things. Chances are, by then you'll just want to move on anyway.