Guest Posted May 3, 2007 Posted May 3, 2007 I have been having an A with another woman for a year and a half. Although I don't know if you could really call it an A because my H knows about it. We (my H and I) have been together for 8 years, and I love him very much, we have children together and I can't imagine my live without him. However, I had only been with women before I met him, just goes to show that you can't help who you fall in love with. When we got together I figured I would never be with another woman again and I was ok with that, I wouldn't have married him if I didn't think I could do it. About 6 years in he noticed that I was unhappy. I didn't even realize it myself, but our sex live was...lacking. I found myself falling deeper and deeper into depression and I didn't know what to do. My H suggested that I have sex with another W, just a one night stand sort of thing. However that "one night stand" has lasted a year and a half. We've moved, far, yet we still find a way to see eachother when we can, but it's getting harder to hold everything together. I love her, but I can't imagine not having my H in my life. My sexual relationship with my H has been fantastic since the OW and I have gotten together and everything seems great. But isn't this wrong? What do I do?
whichwayisup Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 Tell your husband how you feel and decide together what is best for your family. If you didn't have children, I would tell you to end the marriage and walk away...Be with women. But, unfortunately, the kids are a big part of your situation. I could be wrong, but I think you're a lesbian. The sex with your H now is exciting because you are also sleeping with another woman, kicking in your sexual awareness and sexual feelings. That energy you feel with your girlfriend is being used into your sex life with your husband. That isn't fair to him... Let him choose what he wants. Right now you're cheating on him, having the best out of both worlds and that is so selfish. Man or woman, cheating is cheating... You could get a divorce from your husband, have joint custody with your children and still be with your girlfriend. You cannot have both, life doesn't work that way...
LakesideDream Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 If the Husband isn't discouraging it.. is actually condoning it, and.. their marriage has improved who are we to say it's wrong? It's unusual I'll give you that, but it's working for them. Gawd.. I can't believe I typed that!
Trialbyfire Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 If people want an open marriage, both parties need to agree. You owe it to your husband to tell him. He only agreed for you to look out the window, not standing outside... While it's not something that interests me, each to their own...
Chrome Barracuda Posted May 6, 2007 Posted May 6, 2007 I have been having an A with another woman for a year and a half. Although I don't know if you could really call it an A because my H knows about it. We (my H and I) have been together for 8 years, and I love him very much, we have children together and I can't imagine my live without him. However, I had only been with women before I met him, just goes to show that you can't help who you fall in love with. When we got together I figured I would never be with another woman again and I was ok with that, I wouldn't have married him if I didn't think I could do it. About 6 years in he noticed that I was unhappy. I didn't even realize it myself, but our sex live was...lacking. I found myself falling deeper and deeper into depression and I didn't know what to do. My H suggested that I have sex with another W, just a one night stand sort of thing. However that "one night stand" has lasted a year and a half. We've moved, far, yet we still find a way to see eachother when we can, but it's getting harder to hold everything together. I love her, but I can't imagine not having my H in my life. My sexual relationship with my H has been fantastic since the OW and I have gotten together and everything seems great. But isn't this wrong? What do I do? Wow this poster actully disturbed me with what she wrote. She's bi-sexual got her husband and side piece and she's thinking about it? If your husband is cool with it. I say then fine. I dont like cheating. Also if your gay why you marry him, Did you lie to him about your sexuality when you first got married, if you did, That was a horrible injustice, but if you told him the truth and he stll went for it; then okay fine. Also the message your sending out to your children isnt right. That mommy is sleeping with daddy and aunt vicki too! Imagine if the kids finds out, that is gonna be ingrained in their behavior and how they react and treat women in the future. Just know that. It's like you and your husband is both condoning adultery, which isnt cool. Has your husband actually met the OW? has he slept with her also; because in some circumstances it only seems fair. Polygomous relationships is on the rise in america. but it is still a sub-culture. Also if your husband wanted to spend time with a certain female without you will you be able to handle it? It sounds to me you wouldnt like it very much. But if the rules apply to you then the same apply to him as well. I wish you the best, but it sounds as it isnt too bad. Everyone's getting some and no one's getting hurt. but then again things always have a way of going bad...
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