Corey Posted May 3, 2007 Posted May 3, 2007 Hi folks, Seems like you've got some good advice to share, so here goes. I've been seeing a recently separated man for about 2 months now. As far as I can tell, the separation happened 4-6 weeks before we met, though he and his wife have been on the rocks for a lo-o-o-o-ong time. He told me that the separation was a long time coming. Without getting too into details about his situation (it's VERY dramatic, from his POV), we've been talking a lot this week about what will happen in the future. One day he stood me up (with a valid explanation after the fact), and that made me think we should stop seeing each other until he gets his **** dealt with. He didn't disagree, but we both agreed that we enjoy the time we spend together. Yesterday I began to suspect that he is distancing himself from me, and perhaps sleeping with his wife again (he was not sleeping with her since he met me). Everything up until this point has felt genuine. We communicate openly about things. I told him that if there is even a little bit of doubt that he will ultimately divorce his wife, I can't be with him, because, as stated in my title, I do not wish to be the other woman. Not only that, but I firmly believe in the institute of marriage, and don't want to interfere as such. He has seemed to be honest with me, and I'm wondering what's going on with him. Basically, I want to trust my gut in this situation because I need to protect myself. I'm crazy about him, and all indications point to him feeling the same way about me. But I've never been in this situation before. What are the steps that he needs to go through in order to decide if he's ready for a divorce? What are the chances of relapse into his marriage? How do I bring these things up and be a supportive girlfriend without pushing him away? How can I really tell if he's pushing me away? Do I just cut my losses and move on?! Can anyone offer some insight?! PLEASE?! I'm kind of going crazy here.
Felixstowe Posted May 14, 2007 Posted May 14, 2007 Good on you. If he is not willing to commit to you, or lay low while his wife and him seperate then its not worth your pursuing the relationship. Trust me, you don't want the old excuse of him meaning to leave his wife, but he still has feeling for her. Its either, or, no in betweens they only ever end in heart break. Thats my two cents, anyhow.
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