clynn Posted May 3, 2007 Posted May 3, 2007 My bf and I have been together over a year. Things are good. Just very recently I've felt a little uncertain, though. He has admitted he has been very busy with work, and is personally feeling not good, as he hasn't been working out lately, and he is behind on chores and other personal projects. We typically see each other every weekend and occasionally during the week. I'm probably being oversensitive, but I felt a bit nervous/hurt when he said he just wanted to spend a bit of time on his own this weekend / catching up on stuff, etc. (add to this is that the last couple of weeks his sex drive hasn't been as high - he has told me that he thinks it is because he has been tired/stressed).
Lizzie60 Posted May 3, 2007 Posted May 3, 2007 Sorry...but when a guy says he rather catch up on stuff instead of seeing his gf he hasn't seen in a week... well for me it cries out: I'm not that into you anymore. Would you rather do your laundry or see your bf?
Geishawhelk Posted May 3, 2007 Posted May 3, 2007 I would differ.... What are you, joined at the hip? If you've been spending every spare moment together, then at one point (sorry, but) boredom will set in. There's only so much lovey-dovey stuff folks can do until the 'habit' of the relationship settles in. Go out with some friends. Have a life of your own. It will make for more interesting discussions between you two and putting it bluntly, will either make you both more interesting, or - here goes - at least you'll have stuff to fill your life with if he IS losing interest! Remember that in a relationship, you're both doing the same thing, but you're still individuals, with individual needs, interests, likes, dislikes.... Hang loose!!
ibitealil Posted May 3, 2007 Posted May 3, 2007 I agree totally. He has a career and his own aim in his life and he s in that stage now that he needs a support. Dont be needy at this stage, show him you are smart, supportive and you have your own thoughts and your own interest too. Take it easy. If he really loves you he will come around when the "phase" passes away.
ash519 Posted May 3, 2007 Posted May 3, 2007 Hi Clynn- I can see how this would be really hard and upsetting but it sounds like you love him so to me you have 2 choices: Run away, break up with him because he says he needs time alone OR Stay with him, give him space and make him realize how great you are to let him have it.If it turns out it was a lie and he really is losing interest then #1 he's a liar and a chicken and #2 you are better off being able to find someone else who can give what you want. I would personally give it some time. . . if he is an honest guy he will appreciate it!
Lezbean Posted May 3, 2007 Posted May 3, 2007 it is very normal for a man to want time to himself. He needs it to regroup. Give him his space with out being a pain in the butt about it and he will come back and be more thoughtful and loving. The more you push to spend time with him, the more he will withdraw. Give the man his space. Also, check out the Mars Venus Webiste. Particularly the "When a Man Pulls Away" Section. http://www.marsvenus.com/forums/
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