sparkles Posted May 2, 2007 Posted May 2, 2007 Well, i guess heres my area to tell my story.... My boyfriend and I were together for 9 months when he broke up with me because his ex girlfriend (his 1st girlfriend) decided she wanted him back even though she left him for someone else. He was the first everything for me, first date, first kiss etc etc and i was so heartbroken over the entire thing i felt like i would never be ok and that i would litteraly die of a broken heart. That was about 6 months ago and a few weeks ago i ran into him while out and found out him and her broke up a few months ago becasue they just didnt work out. So then we decided to try and give us another go and for 2 weeks, we talked and tried to figure out if there was anything still there between us....well, i felt that even though i was still upset that he left me, i could eventually forgive. I wanted to get back with him so much but his feelings for me were lukewarm and so we decided that nothing could happen when only one of us was going to be fully commited. So now i feel like ive gone 5 steps forward and 3 steps backwards. The feelings of having my heart ripped out have managed to come back although admittedly, not as much as the 1st time, but i feel like im never gonna get over this guy who was my first love. I know it sounds silly but I have this fear that im never gonna get over this guy and find someone else i'll love just as much....
pelagicsands Posted May 2, 2007 Posted May 2, 2007 Hey. I'm not going to tell you that you will "find someone better," or that you will "definitely love again." Nothing is certain in life. But, it is very likely that you will find new love that is much more deserving. Almost certainly definite. Keep your heart open. Does he really deserve your love?! He abandoned you once, and if that wasn't enough he is now using your body to massage his ego. That's what it appears like, anyway. Maybe you had something that was beautiful. Once. But that was then, and this is now. You can't trust him with your heart. The first one is always the hardest. (Well, if if was "significant.") Because you think it will last forever. You will likely love much more "maturely," but it is doubtful you will ever love more "purely," again. The naivety of youth, haha. My thoughts are with you.
Trialbyfire Posted May 2, 2007 Posted May 2, 2007 You will likely love much more "maturely," but it is doubtful you will ever love more "purely," again. The naivety of youth, Some wise words here except it's not only youth that can be naive... Sometimes you give too much of yourself to someone who is incapable of returning it so you learn the lesson of experience. While poets may wax eloquent about the purity of loving someone without reserve, the reality is that you can easily lose yourself in it. At minimum, withhold enough to sustain yourself as an individual, otherwise you stand the chance of creating a codependent relationship.
Author sparkles Posted May 3, 2007 Author Posted May 3, 2007 Thanks for your words of wisdom....I know im not the first person ever to go through a breakup and i certainly wont be the last. I guess I never realised just how much a broken heart can really hurt and that the pain would last as long as it has. We live and learn though. And on another note, how do you just fall in love with someone new? At the moment i can't comprehend how you can just start all over again with someone else...
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