How to quickly tell if he's an "angry" and/or "bitter" man?

[IWalkAlone]

As an angry/bitter man, I find this thread disturbing.

 

First of all, I'm not bitter over my experience with a small number of women who are b!tches. I'm bitter over 15 years of dating experience during which ALL women I've ever been interested in are either 1) in relationships with someone else, 2) lose interest in me within a couple of dates with for no reasons they are willing to share, or 3) were never interetsed in me in the first place.

 

The only way I can think of to cure my bitterness would be to get into a relationship with a women who is romantically/sexually attracted to me, and generally treats me the same way I see other men treated.

 

I know that bitterness/anger is an unattractive trait, so when I meet someone interesting, I shove those feelings aside and give her the benefit of the doubt that she might be different.

 

But once I get a bad sign (the "let's be friends" speech, not calling after she'd promised ot call me back, being too "busy" to go out, etc.) those feelings come back.

 

So when the OP wants to know how to spot men like me who are making sincere efforts to change our attitudes, I feel discouraged.

[Herzen]

I'm not talking about instant-exclusivity...I'm talking about when you said you will date 3 or 4 guys at the same time....that would be enough to turn any guy off if they found out.

 

Not this guy: I'd enjoy the challenge. My experience has been that the more adventuresome the woman, the more fun and interesting.

 

I've never enjoyed overly-cloistered and sexually inexperienced women.

[Salicious Crumb]

Not this guy: I'd enjoy the challenge. My experience has been that the more adventuresome the woman, the more fun and interesting.

 

I've never enjoyed overly-cloistered and sexually inexperienced women.

 

So you are saying that a woman that doesn't date several men at one time, and doesn't play games with them, makes them inexperienced?

[Star Gazer]

I was saying that you make a really big issue of whether or not they were going after you or you were going after them. It seems to really bother you if you feel that it's being implied that you were going after them. And because it really bothers you, you're missing the point. Blind Otter said what the point is very well.....that it's a loop....

I'm not going to bother to explain it....I give up because you just want to argue with whatever i say.

 

 

It doesn't bother me at all. You're reading into things. Just because I disagree with your assessment doesn't mean I'm disturbed over it.

 

Regardless of how I meet them, I frequently find myself involved (either short or long term) with angry/bitter men. Simply put. I'd like to be able to sniff them out in the future. Now, can you help me identify them?? Sheesh.

[alphamale]

Regardless of how I meet them, I frequently find myself involved (either short or long term) with angry/bitter men.

You have to examine your own set of criteria you use to choose men.

 

Simply put. I'd like to be able to sniff them out in the future. Now, can you help me identify them?? Sheesh.

You can't identify them until you know them well....there is no radar scope that will pick these people out of a crowd.

[Herzen]

gender negative comments; severe to hostile affect; poor eye contact; little or no sense of humor; a dark fatigue as to dating, women, erotic relationships; inappropriate comments about other women or relationships whether his own or celebrity pairings; a "divorce-is-inevitable" mindset; an indifferent lover...

[Star Gazer]

I'm bitter over 15 years of dating experience during which ALL women I've ever been interested in are either 1) in relationships with someone else, 2) lose interest in me within a couple of dates with for no reasons they are willing to share, or 3) were never interetsed in me in the first place.

 

Isn't that the definition of every single guy known to man? Not ALL single guys are bitter...so there's gotta be something else there.

[Star Gazer]

You can't identify them until you know them well....there is no radar scope that will pick these people out of a crowd.

That was my fear. Err, I guess I was hoping that comments like those made by the guy I referred to in the original post were a clear red flag. But I've received contradictory opinions in that regard, so I guess I have to check him out further. Hmm.

[Star Gazer]

a dark fatigue as to dating, women, erotic relationships;

 

Explain?

[Herzen]

a certain world weary cynicism and pessimism about ever finding The ONE;a heaviness as opposed to lightness of being; a frequent dater of many, many people over many years and an inclination to date those who are inappropriate as measured by age, class, profession, intelligence;

 

or, in the other extreme, someone who has all but given up and simply trolls the dating sites or bars for a quick bang or stroke;

 

watch out for a certain nastiness, cynicism, all out negativity about the mating game;

 

avoid the burn-outs...

[jcster]

Also - beware of people who never take responsibility for their part in the breakdown of their previous relationships. "Victim" = bitter

[sweetscarlet]

You have to examine your own set of criteria you use to choose men.

 

 

 

 

ahem....correction...SHE does not choose them......however, if YOU say that, it's obviously ok......

[Star Gazer]

ahem....correction...SHE does not choose them......however, if YOU say that, it's obviously ok......

 

What a SNARKY post!

[Star Gazer]

a certain world weary cynicism and pessimism about ever finding The ONE;a heaviness as opposed to lightness of being; a frequent dater of many, many people over many years and an inclination to date those who are inappropriate as measured by age, class, profession, intelligence;

 

or, in the other extreme, someone who has all but given up and simply trolls the dating sites or bars for a quick bang or stroke;

 

watch out for a certain nastiness, cynicism, all out negativity about the mating game;

 

avoid the burn-outs...

 

 

Gotcha. It was the "erotic relationships" part of your message that confused me. I was thinking "what's so wrong with thinking about erotic relationships...?" Hehe.

[tanbark813]

Oh no she di'n't!

[Star Gazer]

Oh no she di'n't!

 

Double snaps in Z-formation!

[tanbark813]

Double snaps in Z-formation!

 

You go girl!

[sweetscarlet]

What a SNARKY post!

 

 

Well...now that you brought it up, SG....care to elaborate on why when Alpha said the EXACT same thing that I did it was "ok" and why you went off on ME?

[Star Gazer]

Well...now that you brought it up, SG....care to elaborate on why when Alpha said the EXACT same thing that I did it was "ok" and why you went off on ME?

 

I didn't "go off" on you. Jeezzzzuuuuussss. MOVE ON.

 

I disagreed with you - that's it. No more, no less. If you can't accept the fact that people are going to disagree with your opinion, I suggest refrain from responding to ANYONE's threads.

[tanbark813]

You two should Jello wrestle.

[Art_Critic]

You two should Jello wrestle.

Do you think they could agree on a flavor ?.. I vote for Cherry

[Star Gazer]

This is the LAST TIME I'm going to respond to you about this, SS.

 

To make sure I hadn't missed something, I went back and reread what Alpha wrote to me in this thread. He didn't say the same thing you did at all.

 

Secondly, I have been NOTHING but RESPECTFUL to you in this thread.

 

I even went as far as to say: I appreciate the effort you put into your response, but I really don't think that's it at all. (For what it's worth - I'm not even usually that nice when I disagree with someone!! Sheesh!)

 

You tried to bait me into a fight. My response was as follows: It doesn't bother me at all. You're reading into things. Just because I disagree with your assessment doesn't mean I'm disturbed over it.

 

SS, you're going a little weird on me by saying I'm being "snarky" and "going off on you." Totally untrue.

 

Now please, drop this issue. Thanks.

[Star Gazer]

Do you think they could agree on a flavor ?.. I vote for Cherry

 

Lime is my favorite flavor of jello, but red is so much more flattering.

[DanielMadr]

Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack. General S. Patton

 

These bitter guys want assurance you will not add up to their bitterness. It says about them, they are untactful and a little insecure in terms they mind too much how other people treat them.

[alphamale]

ahem....correction...SHE does not choose them......however, if YOU say that, it's obviously ok......

women choose which men they want to be with....and the more things they have going for them then the more men they have to choose from. easy as pie. men generally have little say in the matter.

 

the majority of relationships are started AND ended by the female.