lilaikenangel Posted April 24, 2007 Posted April 24, 2007 i kind of posted this on yahoo questions section on april 17...sorry for the bad layout. my boyfriend...i dont if i should call him that or not, are on a break. but when he said break he means, keep your options open because i dont know if im going back to the h.s. me and him were in a serious relationship until it was two weeks into our relationship where he had to transfer out b/c of a district rule. he ended up going to the h.s near his area. we cont. that and it was going to be three months into our relationship. it was eating us up how we couldnt see eachother. within the next few weeks, b/c of me having AP exams and him busy w/ school and family, we wont be seeing eachother for a month and 1/2. we have NOTHING against eachother, no hatred or anything, love eachother so much. but it had to be the distance b/c of seperate schools. 1 day he even cried b/c we dont do things together everyday in person. and on the webcam, he cried when i cried. he scolded at me saying IS HE RIGHT about the decision? he said there is 2nd chance but doesnt know if he'll be back. Additional Details 6 days ago its funny how in his myspace...he put in his headline "time for a break!!!" he put single in his status but on his about me portion, he still has the info about im his g/f and etc. so how do you explain about that?? is this break and break and right decision b/c on the situation we were in...the distance and etc? 6 days ago and oh! he still kept the pictures of both of us on his myspace...in an album that says "memories that will last!!!" 6 days ago he also mentions that he wants to cont that every night talk that we do...and if he doesnt come back to the h.s., still wants to remain the best of friends close type. 6 days ago is his decision right? how do you interpret this whole thing im dealing with?? it made me cry how i was treating it as if it's a break up but it's just A BREAK...sorry to bug you guys but im new to this whole break...and he promised me, when he transfers back in to my h.s, he said just give himself a week and all those feelings will come back AND that he'll pick it up from where we left off. considering now...it hurts that yesterday i talked to him yesterday but at a bad time. both of us will be busy for the month of may because of me with AP exams and him with so many projects assigned to him. today is our 3rd month anniversary...should i count it? last time we saw eachother in person was our 2nd month anniversary. when i brought up the whole 3 months thing, he became quiet and said ,"oh ya...it sucks....*long pause*...too bad..." on the phone convo...he told me to not worry and no options (as in seeing other people...b/c he doesnt know if he'll be back next year to my school...he said he will try his best b/c of parents and etc.) note....we dont drive....not yet.... main question....how should i treat this whole situation???? help me define what does this whole break he wants??? he's telling me to not worry about it but i worry still....b/c of pros and cons about it. sometimes i feel that he's trying to get with or like someone but it's not entirely 101% for sure. and it also hurts how he cant say i love you anymore....because of distance. i want to say it and i do mean it but for him he cant. once again....SOOOO SORRY if i confused any of you guys but i just need some comfort and help with this thing....
Davis Posted April 24, 2007 Posted April 24, 2007 Angel, it's difficult for you to see the whole picture when you're so emotional and so young. This is not a good situation for you and you're going to continue to feel rotten if you do not make a move. This is not what you want to here, but you need to move on. YOU are in charge of your life! DO NOT let him dictate your life or that you are on "break", you have to wait around and "maybe" it will work someday. You are not his doormat and his "comfort" until he decides to replace you with another girl (and, sorry, this will happen). YOU take charge of your life and be done with him. You will feel empowered and better and this is the only way it can work. If you don't, you're going to continue and continue this heart ache. I know you feel like he's the love of your life (been there, if you can imagine). Not to be a downer, but at your age, these relationships rarely if ever work and have an incredibly high divorce rate if you get married before you're 28. Again, not what you want to hear, but there will be many great guys and loves in your life until you find the right one and get married. It sucks, be we all go thru it cuz it's life. So what does all this mean? You do not tell him you're done. You just do it. You go into NC. You do not respond to his contacts with you. You DO NOT go on his myspace page!!!! (BIG MISTAKE). NO texts, email, myspace comments, nothing! You do not talk to his friends or anyone that knows him. You TELL your friends that if they see or hear anything about him you DO NOT want to know!! Move forward!! You will get thru it, promise!!
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