Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[me85]

No I don't want to be your friend. I don't want to be anything less than first if I was ever to be in your life. Yes being with you would be easier, it would eliminate all the hurt I am feeling. But, it would not be right, you do not deserve me. You have hurt me tremendously and I may be able to forgive you in the future, but I cannot now. Especially if you are here and with me seeing you the way you are. You are not the person I thought you once were.

 

You made all the choices. You knew everything about me. You chose to hurt me, because you knew it would hurt me and you still did it. I was there for you when you needed me but when I needed you, you weren't there. Instead you were with him. Cheating on me. And now that I'm gone you're still with him. But what do I expect.

 

You went out of your way to see him. You lied to me. You made excuses for him. Even he thought it was weird you going to his, but you said it didn't matter. You didn't asked me, you took my trust for granted. You chose him over me. You should of been meeting him over me. You never should of lied to me.

 

You decided he was better than me. It's why you did what you did. Why you're doing what you're doing. You haven't moved on. You're filling a hole inside you which cannot be filled. You think you're happy but all you're doing is running away from the truth. You will never be satisfied.

 

You're incapable of a serious relationship. You will just jump from one to the other. Searching for excitement, thinking it's love. Its not, you confuse love for infatuation. But what we had was a relationship, and as soon as you felt it slip, that puppy love leave and all that remained was real love and commitment. You ran. You pushed me away. You chose lust over love.

 

We had something real. You decided what we had wasn't worth fighting for. So I'm deciding you're not fighting for. I don't want to talk to you ever again until you realise and reconcile. And if that doesn't happen then oh well. I would of already moved on. I am not a toy you can drop on the floor when you see something new.

 

Yes all these things are in the past and cannot be changed. But the future can be controlled. And I'm taking control of mine. Good luck with taking control of yours.

 

 

((APPLAUSE))

This is beautiful. It's word for word how I feel about my ex.

 

INSANE how much our stories mirror each other.

 

Maybe I should email this to my ex... lol NOT. I'll just kill him with silence.

[TheBladeRunner]

Just wanted to say thanks for building our child up only to disappoint her, so glad you were there for your train wreck friend instead of being here for the plans YOU made with your child.....hope it was worth it. I am so done making YOUR mistakes better. You chose this life (D), now you can live with it; YOUR guilt is NOT my problem anymore.

 

You told me to tell her about "doing this" and "doing that"......YOU tell her! I am done placing talismans for YOUR BS, do it your stinking self from now on. They say don't bad mouth the "X".....I don't need to, YOU screw it up all on your own!

 

Don't worry.....I'll take care of our child, I always will and do.

[AnyaNova]

You always had a touch of grey.

 

Kind of suits you anyway.

[AnyaNova]

You know, when I die and go to heaven.

 

I'll have all the questions about the Universe and why evil and all that.

 

But one of my questions that I will need answered is why the hell you put us both through so much pain.

[me85]

You know, when I die and go to heaven.

 

I'll have all the questions about the Universe and why evil and all that.

 

But one of my questions that I will need answered is why the hell you put us both through so much pain.

 

I really hope you are ok. My heart goes out to you & I feel the same way.

[AnyaNova]

I really hope you are ok. My heart goes out to you & I feel the same way.

 

Thank you! The hardest part of getting over this has been knowing that there was something, whether it was his family or his extreme and often crippling fears or both that overpowered him, because he did t fundamentally want the split either and I don't get it.

 

I mean I do. The fearful avoidant thing makes a whole lot of sense. But fundamentally he caused us both way more pain than facing his issues would have caused.

 

Plus, I'm crashing a bit today, but at least a managed to get several articles read that I needed to. Less than I'd hoped, and a good final group project presented today

[jonsnuh]

Tonight I woke up having dreamt you contacted me asking to be together again.

 

I don't want you. I know this could never happen after what I had seen on your OLD profile. You would never want to date a previous ex. You had done things that had hurt me, and obviously out of spite.

 

Why should you of any people deserve someone who is wholesome, respectful, passionate, loyal, caring, honest, when you yourself couldn't meet that bar? When you were the one who had said we should have no expectations for each other? When you were the one who said there was no trust, while any lack of communication occurred from your side? You seek validation from your friends and family, friends you said you would make just for sex.

 

I thought better of you. I respected you. I trusted you. You were my demise.

[lamis]

Caring so much about you and missing you so much is starting to be exhausting and feel pointless.

[Kelika]

Really?

 

After all those years together, THAT'S who you are?

 

You know, when we first started dating, you were whole. Healthy. Seven months out of a 2-year relationship. That's enough time. And you and I moved slowly because of the distance.

 

Then there was no distance, and you were whole. Healthy. Emotionally prepared, willing to give your all, solid, stable.

 

I stayed with you through your disability. You stayed with me through mine. We've been through deaths in our families, financial setbacks, ups, downs, ins, outs. I stayed by you as your anxieties took over, and you began packing your house with stuff. I watched as you bought, and bought, and bought. I asked what was missing in your life that you were trying to replace. Was it kids? Did you want children?

 

"No. No. I've said a million times I DO NOT WANT KIDS."

 

Then what? What was missing?

 

"NOTHING."

 

Then was it me? Was I doing something? Treating you poorly? Making you anxious?

 

"No, of course not!"

 

"Then what's on your mind? What's driving you to do this?"

 

You never did answer. You never could confront your issues. Ignore them, and they will go away, right?

 

You have everything: a home, a job you pretty much can't lose without killing someone, a retirement coming to you, friends and family around you, money to spare, a woman who loves you.

 

Or, you did. You don't have the woman anymore. Instead you have the cum-dumpster rebound.

 

You're so disappointing. You did everything right after the relationship before yours with me. So right, that I would wonder if you had just checked out of our relationship long before ending it, but if you did, you're one hell of an actor with your tears and declarations of feelings and love, even after you started screwing her.

 

When did you get to be such a coward? When did you become this man-child who can't spend five minutes alone to sort out his feelings and stop to consider that he acted in haste?

 

It won't end well. That's what everyone tells me. That's usually how these things go. You'll put all your effort into her, yet sooner or later you'll see she's not filling the void. They say you'll dump her, but I know you. The whole point is for you to not be alone, so you won't end it. You'll just treat her like garbage until she gets sick of you and leaves you. It may take three months, or six, but she will notice. She will be able to tell you're not really with her.

 

Let's hope she's not a psycho. She looks like she might be, to so foolishly walk into a relationship with you when she knows your situation. It shows questionable judgment about men on her part. Better hope you don't catch anything.

 

But maybe it will work out. Maybe this is something real for you.

 

Does it matter?

 

You're contaminated now.

 

And I have a date next week.

 

You're an idiot.

 

You really are.

Edited May 13, 2014 by Kelika

[Isthereanybodythere]

I really want to speak to you, I hate your friend in college, she is a slut and drove us apart. I still love you like the first time I laid eyes on you.

 

Guys, I really want to speak to her, she was my best friend and lover for 2 years and last week it all went in a flash. I don't know what to expect, I've done NC for a week but I just want to make peace and sort stuff out with her, I still love her and she said it back too, she told me before we had NC that she never loved me anyway because we argued.. I thought she was just saying that to make me feel like **** and didn't mean it, can I get some advice?

[John manning]

This is harder than i ever thought it would be, I couldn't just delete our chat , I had to screen shot the most beautiful bits of it , and there were a lot. Reading over them has reduced me to nothing more than tears.

 

I feel empty, alone and above all uncertain.

 

I hope you know what my intentions are by not contacting you, Im hurt beyond repair, I wil never fully get over this but I would like to get to a point where looking at you or even thinking about brings back a river of beautiful memories and what could have been...

[Mary Oak]

My heart hurts today. I just closed the last checking account we had together. I had to give you the paperwork to have notarized. I know you probably think I am being mean as I told you we were keep that account open just in case one of had an emergency. I still trust you but I don't trust your gf. It is for the best anyway I know. Finality. I just hurt so much. Not because of that exactly but for what I lost. I know this was my fault. I know I should have done better. I am a changed person after these two years, but you don't care to know me. My heart breaks every day. I feel like such a loser that I can't move on. I know there is no hope. I know that. I just miss you and our life more than you will ever know. You taught me how to love then took it away. Today is one of the worse I have had in a while. The tears still fall after all the time. You are moved on. I should be happy for you but honestly it makes me sad. Selfish huh? No one knows of this pain as I put on a happy face. I just wait to get home and cry. I love you still and will forever.

[FredJones80]

My heart hurts today. I just closed the last checking account we had together. I had to give you the paperwork to have notarized. I know you probably think I am being mean as I told you we were keep that account open just in case one of had an emergency. I still trust you but I don't trust your gf. It is for the best anyway I know. Finality. I just hurt so much. Not because of that exactly but for what I lost. I know this was my fault. I know I should have done better. I am a changed person after these two years, but you don't care to know me. My heart breaks every day. I feel like such a loser that I can't move on. I know there is no hope. I know that. I just miss you and our life more than you will ever know. You taught me how to love then took it away. Today is one of the worse I have had in a while. The tears still fall after all the time. You are moved on. I should be happy for you but honestly it makes me sad. Selfish huh? No one knows of this pain as I put on a happy face. I just wait to get home and cry. I love you still and will forever.

 

Damn, this choked me up.

[me85]

Damn, this choked me up.

 

It did me too!

[me85]

In a few days I will be at a festival and you will be there too. I may have to go by myself and that will be the most depressing thing ever if I do. But you'll be there with her. Most likely.

 

I pray to God that we do not run into one another.

 

I pray God will shield me from having to see you with someone else.

 

She's tall, like you. She's 6 years younger. She's going for her masters.

 

She's who you want. For the moment. You have been seeing her for 5 months. Wow.

 

But she will find out about you eventually. You can't hide who you truly are forever.

 

I'm sure she wouldn't be pleased to know you slept with me while with her. Twice. And remained in contact with me the entire time.

 

I just found out you two are an official couple. I have since removed you completely from my life.

 

That poor girl.

[swimmingcat]

I risked all I had so I could be with you. But you threw me under the bus.

 

I hope everything goes good for you and your boyfriend now that you are going to move in together. Just remember for the next time to not play with the feelings of others. It hurts so much, but I know that I also made mistakes.

 

It's been hell these past two months and you made me feel worthless so I'm on my way to improve myself, learn and change to be someone that I will be proud to be.

 

It's going to be so hard to start a new life on my own but I've always loved the unknown and the adventure. I guess you already have yours planned.

 

Remember that your last words in this incredible life to me were "I don't want to hear from you never again", so don't worry, you won't.

 

Peace and take care.

[Kansas87]

Six months ago I was doing this same sort of activity, in the same place, when I finally broke down and responded to your emails about missing me. Then we tried to be friends. Then it all fell apart again. I know what I did wrong; believe me. I just wish you hadn't given up.

 

I really want to text you tonight and ask if you're sure this is what you want, but I won't. I know I can't. For all I know you're with someone new.

 

Tomorrow's my birthday. While we were trying to "take it slow and see how it goes," I had this secret hope that that would be the day you'd ask me to be official, or that you'd do something sweet like send me flowers or bring me lunch.

 

Now I have nothing but work to do tomorrow. Nobody around here to see or hang out with. Nothing special planned.

 

I miss you so much.

[jt27]

I just wait to get home and cry.

 

Mary Oak, I am right there with ya.

 

My heart hurts today too. It hurts throughout everyday. I lost my best friend and my lover. My confidant and my other half. Someone that taught me how to love. Someone that always knew how to make me smile. You gave me the greatest feeling in the world only to replace it with the worst. You proved to me I can love and love deeply and accept faults and imperfections. But you left me because of mine. I know I have fault and and have changed and only wish to show you. I know I can't and it crushes me. I wanted to marry you, I really did. I still do. Silly huh? I wanted to spend this life, the next life and all eternity with you. You changed how I look at the world. I let go of cynisism, and grabbed a hold of hope. I still have hope for us, though it is false hope. I can"t seem to let you go. You are the love of my life and don't know if I could ever let go of that. I wish somehow you could see this to see how much I truly miss you. My heart breaks at the very thought of you. Every memory of us makes me want to cry. I know you don't care but I will always care and love you. I miss you so incredibly much. The pain has broken me.

[sooshi]

Wait a minute.

 

I've been sad because you--someone who clearly doesn't have an ounce of respect for me--choose not to have me in your life? Oh, sooshi, the world of emotions.

 

It's a blessing. It doesn't always feel that way, but I don't want to put up with any more of your lashing out sessions, your insults, your abuse.

 

I don't know why I miss you. I guess I miss the good stuff about you. When you actually cared and showed respect.

 

But I don't miss the ugly stuff.

 

I deserve so much better than that.

[Mary Oak]

Hey again... it's just me. Yesterday you emailed me and said that you felt like I thought you were nonchalant and had just moved on. You said it was not how you felt and you could never explain how you truly felt. But, you have moved on sweetheart, you moved on with my "friend". How I wish I had never brought her back into my life. You actually had the nerve to tell me that she misses me. WOW. well, she will have a lifetime to miss me. SHe took what I love. There is no recovery for that. I don't blame her for wanting you. You are an incredible woman. I know you left because of my faults, but she had been setting the stage for a long time. She was steadfast in her approach, if only I could have seen it then.

 

But, time does change things. Only thing it hasn't changed is my love for you. I wish it would, honestly. I miss you seems too trite to even say anymore. My insides feel empty. No one could take your place. I was replaced so easily though...

 

I, unfortunately, will continue to love you from a distant...

 

Take care...

[sooshi]

Maybe I'm being too hard on you.

 

I know you have a lot of inner chaos. Maybe I should be more understanding and empathetic to what you go through when it comes to your unpleasant treatment towards me at times. Maybe you were projecting your own stuff onto me.

 

I'm sorry for being angry with you, for not being forgiving or understanding or compassionate enough.

[HumiliatedGrapes]

You continually show how full of lies and false promises you are, one minute you're telling me you'll do anything to be with me again, how sorry you are and that you'll prove to me that everything was a mistake, practically begging me.. and as silly as I am, I listened and then you go again 2 days later. But its always been that way, so why did I expect any different?

 

I haven't heard from you in almost a month now, I know you well enough, so I know without looking that you've moved on to someone else, that's the only reason you'd stop contacting me, because you can't bear to not have someone there to do everything for you, you need someone to fill in your gaps. Admitting to that crushed me at first, even more than the time I found out you were making advances towards another girl online, to know that I stuck by you through everything and now you've completely discarded me, which yes.. I wanted rid of you, I wanted better for myself eventually, but a silly part of me was praying for you to change, to mean everything you said, the same way I spent most of our relationship believing in some magic fairy tale side of you that doesn't exist.

 

I've never felt so low and broken as I did this past year but I'm actually beginning to not care, I'm beginning to realise so many things that I should not have taken from you. Even things that might seem silly to others, I know I can find someone who treats me better.. I know that there is going to be someone one day who loves the size of my breasts, just the way they are. They're not going to make me feel like I'm insignificant if I don't look a certain way.. There is going to be someone who loves every single part of my body the way it is and most importantly I'm going to be far more than just a body to them. They'll love me for my mind and for who I am, they'll talk to their friends about how much fun we have together or how special our relationship is, or how special I am, rather than just showing them intimate pictures that were supposed to be between us. One day someone is not going to be too scared or too selfish to help me move the relationship forward, to go out there with me and make the world ours, they won't leave it all up to me to do the work, they'll want to go the distance for me, just as much as I want to for them. They won't only see me as a sex object, they'll want to do so much more and admire so much more about me, they'll want to lay in bed with me and simply cuddle sometimes and they won't tell me Im clingy or silly if that's what I need that day. They'll want to romance me, they'll meet me at the airport or at the bus station when I come to visit them, they'll want to have a special night on valentines day and they won't forget my birthday. But perhaps most importantly, they'll be there for me, they won't give up on me.. they won't emotionally cheat when things get hard or have their ears pricked up, listening, ready for something 'better' to come along, or something that may be easier. They won't take my flaws I already know I have and hold them against me, they won't make me so scared and anxious that I have panic attacks. I'll feel safe. They won't let other people talk negatively about me, they'll have my back and more than that.. they won't ever talk badly about me to others or verbally abuse me. They'll appreciate all the little things I do, they'll find it nice that I like to wear dresses and put make up on sometimes and they won't knock me down for it and tell me I'm vain for caring about my appearance, especially if they know I used to suffer with bulimia.. they'll encourage me to hold my head high, they'll be proud of me accepting myself, they won't try to squish me down.

 

And I'll give them everything back like I used to do with you, only it won't be wasted on some selfish low life like it once was.. and I won't let my self esteem settle for anything less than it should be. Even if I don't meet this person until Im 65, thats ok.. I've realised since you left that I'm not worthless or useless like you told me, and yes to quote you, I do 'love myself, but that's how it should be, I have family and heck, I'm only 21, I have everything ahead of me. I know that every time you told me that no one else would ever want me, it was bull**** (Pardon my French), it was complete and utter bull**** so that you could have some pathetic sense of control to try to make yourself feel better. You were my first love which is a shame, but you won't be my last. There's so much more out there.

 

Also, I think I forgive you for what you did, but I most certainly do not like you.

[STM206]

I can't believe I believed everything we had would last. So young and naive for me to think, he was from your past. Love is so blind, It feels right when it's wrong.

[johnson_j]

Ms, I want to believe in you. I want to believe that everything we discussed, the trips, the houses, the cars, the laughter and companionship were real and that you had as much intention of following through as I did. I want to believe you made a mistake with your ex and you just accidently got caught up in it, and that we were working on a path to reconciliation before he came knocking again. But the reality is that I don't know what to believe, how much was lies. I do know one thing - when I looked into your eyes when I touched you I saw love. There was no mistaking that. I'm glad I got to see that, even if it wasn't for the long haul like we discussed, it was one of the most beautiful sights I've ever seen in my life.

[AnyaNova]

I shouldn't have done it.

 

I was nutritionally crashing again after the final and the stress of the paper that I was up most of the night finishing. The irony there is that I wanted to start in February or March because I knew if I waited until our prof wanted us to start, I would end up being so bogged down with the nutritional deficiencies and other work due that it would be last minute and so it was.

 

So I was crashing, missing you a little and googled you.

 

And found out just by a little tag under the MyLife profile link on the google search that you've moved away from the town you lived in a year ago. Back to your parents, or at least to their town.

 

A quick search of your address revealed that it looks like its been sold on May 1st.

 

Your gone. You're really really gone.

 

You loved that job. You were so proud of your condo.

 

What happened? Are you hurting? I wouldn't think you would have lost your job. What is going on????

 

I'm worried about you and there's nothing I can do and despite my hopes, I suspect you won't even take the time to let me know that you're okay and that something terrible didn't happen to you.

 

But whatever happened, to lose those things must have hurt you. I would have done anything to be there for you and ease your pain.

 

And now I hurt for you, yet again.

 

And the truth that I must face, is that even when I'm hurting for you, it apparently doesn't move you. Doesn't bother you or cause you enough of an issue to reach out and do something to help alleviate it.