Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[Emilia]

I wish you would stop laughing, I can hear you at the other end of the office!

[sickoflove11]

I woke up early today… but went back to sleep just so I could dream of you some more.

It made me happy to see you and talk to you and be with you.

But now, I feel like crap.

[AnyaNova]

Something strange happened last night. I drove an hour to meet someone from LS, actually, who lives in my area. I had a really good time talking with him.

 

Before driving home, I stopped at a gas station to use the restroom. It was one of those overhead neon lights that fill the room with harsh light. But still, I looked up while washing my hands and saw myself in the mirror. I know looks are only surface. I know that who i am is most important. I still don't understand because I thought I looked beautiful.

 

I'm not used to that.

Edited January 10, 2014 by AnyaNova

[AnyaNova]

I woke up early today… but went back to sleep just so I could dream of you some more.

It made me happy to see you and talk to you and be with you.

But now, I feel like crap.

 

Eventually you will get to the point where fantasies and dreams will just hurt too much.

 

Could you make he conscious choice to try and think and dream about the guy who will be in your life next?

[seekingpeaceinlove]

After we broke up I threw myself into working out. I used the anger I had towards you to fuel my workouts and damn did it feel good. I was training to be your hottest ex. lol. Eventually, I started training for myself and I feel amazing. I've dropped weight and my body is re-sculpting. You loved my booty before..you would be obsessed with it now.

 

I am dying to run into you so you can see the changes, but I hope sooner than later I can get to a point where I don't care anymore.

[TuffJuff]

I cant keep waiting for you to fix things between us. It has been 2 months now and you have done nothing to even try. You say I am your best friend and you want desperately to fix us, but you don't know how. Well get off your ass and try something. Anything is better than nothing! You are not in this alone and I am willing to help, but I need something, ANYTHING to work with. I have gotten nothing. I do not deserve this. I do not deserve to feel this way. I did nothing wrong. The only mistake I made was loving you. Why is the innocent one suffering, while the one who broke us just moves on? You say things will be awkward and weird between us. Umm in case you didn't notice I thrive on awkward and weirdness. It is my thing. When did you become such a pussy? You are a strong woman who fights for what she wants. I know this. I have seen it. Actions speak louder than words and I truly know how you feel about us now. I was just a guy that you used for money, humor, alcohol, emotional support, ego boost, etc. I cant do this anymore. I am starting to see someone else. Its nothing serious yet, but I like her and I am pretty sure she actually likes me. I am moving on. You are in the past. Goodbye

[jphcbpa]

drove by the place we had our second date. I was thinking of that list you brought with you. it was a list of your future mate that you written years before meeting me and gave that list up to God. you let me read that list and you were telling me that I was that list.

 

if I was what you so wanted, then what changed in 16 months? we never argued, no one cheated or lied, stole or acted out. you got scared and it feels uncomfortable for you to let someone in. it is confusing because part of you wants me and a part of you will not allow that other part to want me.

 

I miss your smile, eyes, laugh, our connection and how we could not keep our hands off each other.

[Softie]

F******g C**t

 

I hate you.

[Xemyd]

I've had such a bad day and all I want is your arms around me again.

 

 

 

 

 

At this point it's too late for things to work out. I don't think I could take you back and be happy after so long. But I still want you. I want you to tell me everything will be ok.

[JoelBarish]

BPD - look into it. Here is an article called 12 Signs You are Dating a BPD Woman. I think it is very descriptive of your personality. This is why you are unhappy. This is why you would never admit you were wrong...

 

1. She makes you feel incredibly special and says things to you that no woman has ever said before. (It is called idealizing or idealization and it’s a psychological defense mechanism normally used by children on their parents.) The fact is that she does not really believe that you are any more special than anyone else is.)

 

2. She buys you very nice, even expensive gifts, very early in the relationship.

 

3. She quickly begins using the word “love”, often within the first few dates. (It is not real, although she may believe it is, real love does not happen in a week as most emotionally healthy people know.)

 

4. She makes her ex-husband or ex-boyfriend out to be a bad person, even abusive. (She is most likely exaggerating. In truth, any man who was married to or in a relationship with a borderline woman would certainly have plenty of reasons to be angry, frustrated, confused, and even hurt.)

 

5. She talks about how her ex cheated on her. (Maybe he did and maybe he did not, but it is just as likely that she cheated on him. Borderline woman are more likely than the average woman to be promiscuous and to cheat in relationships. The reasons are complex and a borderline woman can often justify her own cheating.

 

6. She had sex with you on the first or the second date. (It may have been an attempt to grab your attention or to try to control you.)

 

7. She drinks to excess and perhaps uses drugs? (alcohol, prescription drugs, and "recreational drugs" are one of the quickest, most available and efficient ways for those with bpd to soothe their deep emotional pain and anxiety.)

 

8. She gets very jealous when you talk about other women, even your female friends. (Borderline women are very insecure and they view the other women in your life as a threat. They often develop something called “delusional jealousy” and will imagine that their partner is being unfaithful)

 

9. She is an amazing lover who will do whatever it takes to please you in bed. (Sex is almost like a weapon for a borderline woman, she will use it to get control of you and secure you. Borderline women also seem to enjoy sex more and are generally more promiscuous. It is believed that the close intimate contact fills the emotional emptiness inside of them.)

 

10. She is incredibly moody, with periodic bursts of extreme anger, sometimes called borderline rage. (Mood instability is a common clinical feature of borderline personality disorder. Her moods can swing very rapidly, often within hours, from gloomy and depressed to happy to anxious to angry.)

 

11. She has a very difficult time with compliments. One of the underlying issues with bpd is a sense of being defective, unworthy, and unlovable. Women with bpd generally have low self esteem which borders on "self loathing"; a kind of hatred of oneself. As a result they will often doubt and question the sincerity of your compliments.

 

12. She has problems accepting blame or apologizing. This is certainly not true of all women with bpd, but it is for many. It is a trait that is common to both narcissists and borderlines; accepting responsibility for their actions. If you are dating a borderline woman and happen to be on the receiving end of her, "inability to accept blame", it can be quite remarkable.

[Xemyd]

F*ck you, you stupid prick.

 

I obviously didn't mean anything to you, why couldn't you have just grown a pair and told me that yourself. Instead you chose to plant this damn hope in my mind that someday we'd work out.

 

I hate that I cry over you. I had faith in men because of you, that maybe they aren't all *******s, maybe there were good guys. No, apparently good guys are just bad ones in disguise.

 

I wish my family could hate you as much as I do right now, I guess you fooled them too.

[sickoflove11]

Eventually you will get to the point where fantasies and dreams will just hurt too much.

 

Could you make he conscious choice to try and think and dream about the guy who will be in your life next?

 

I wake up thinking it's almost real then reality hits and it's like woah that was so farfetched..

 

I could definitely give it a try! It is very common for me to have super bizarre dreams with the most random people I haven't seen in years or just things you couldn't imagine.

 

I do not know how my mind comes up with this stuff, I've given up on finding a meaning but I do know these "ex" dreams have gone away in the past with other exs and if they are ever in a dream now, it has no effect on me.

 

Thank you for the advice though, I will give it a shot!

[AnyaNova]

I wish I could Eternal Sunshine you and your sweet intelligence and earnestness. Not in the "get back together at the end" sense like I meant in September when I wrote that thing that you ignored...

 

In the wipe you permanently from my memory sense.

 

I gave you my trust, loyalty, and love.

 

I don't even know how to define what you gave me.

[Tryingtobegrateful]

Every time I am reminded of you, I feel dirty, used. I remember you saying xxxxx had your whole heart while you only had one-third of hers. So you never really want an open relationship, you only wanted it with me, I just wonder how low I was in your heart

[Mondmellonw]

You used me.

Now you're happy with those girls... The ones that don't really give a **** abour your drinking, the ones that like to have casual sex just as much as you do.

It's sad, cause I thought you really loved me. But you don't have an idea of what true love is, and make fun of me being so sentimental...

I should be the one to pity you.

 

Please, keep your lies to yourself and stop making me look like I was the one who manipulated you, you're acting like a bitch, not a man.

[Tryingtobegrateful]

**** off I wont forgive you, just to let you have peace, you dont deserve it

Did you forgive me when I asked to see your family just because of our cultural difference? No you decided that our expectations were different without discussing

Did you forgive me when I became needy due to my mother's cancer? No you decided that I had always been like this since day 1

Did you forgive me when I made a stupid decision which came out of goodwill to impress you? No you decided that your feelings have changed

[AnnaAnna]

Happy New Year to you too, you narcissistic bastard!

Edited January 11, 2014 by AnnaAnna

[AnyaNova]

I have the sinking feeling that if you do try your hand at dating again, that you will say that you haven't had any significant relationships since high school.

 

That I will be effectively written out of your history.

 

It makes me wonder, did you actually go from high school to 32 without a significant relationship, or did you just write all of them out. Erase them.

[The Situation]

Not feeling sad tonight, but I just want you here. Now I've calmed down and taken control of my life, and depending on whether you're still the same lovely person I once knew, I just have this feeling we'd be perfect now.

 

But hey, it's probably too late and I've no idea how to speak to you now.

 

Do I seriously just wait to see if we cross again or I meet someone as good for me as you were? I can still see you there in the future. For the first time today I could even envision you with 'our' children, in a non-weird way. I just pictured you holding our baby, and you looked so happy. You'd make an amazing mother one day. You certainly helped 'mother' me through my darkest times, it was just a shame that I didn't know that I needed time.

 

I really wish you all the happiness in the world. I think I'm finally coming to acceptance. If there's one thing that's certain, is that I'm ready for commitment now. With who, I have absolutely no idea.

 

Still miss you, but when I think of you now I smile. Hope to see you again one day.

[Xemyd]

I wish you were here beside me, head on your shoulder, no talking, just happy.

[amorydiver]

I almost got in a fight at the bar tonight. some girls boyfriend threw me up against the wall and grabbed my neck. I wish you were there to see it. I just looked him in the eyes and said "what?" no, no, I wasn't inappropriate at all. just being me, talking, being sociable and what not, never would have known she was with some one till that hand grabbed me, almost started a brewhaha. yeah I handled it like a champ. didn't back down but didn't fight either. . .straight southpaw swag. . . getting over you isn't going to be easy. but then again. its not so hard.

[sickoflove11]

What changed in 1 week to make you stop contacting me forever? It's something I can't stop thinking about.

Did you decide we had been broken up for 6 months it was time for NC?

Time to stop keeping in touch?

After letting myself get strung along for 6 months you're the one who called it quits. That should have been me.

I should have been strong enough.

Maybe you just found someone else that soon.

I'll let myself believe anything, and finally get over you.

[The Situation]

Woke up with a heavy heart this morning.

 

I'm ok when I get moving, but my God I MISS YOU and feel that telling you just that might be enough to see you again. No demands, I promise. I just miss your laugh, your smile, how comforting you were. If only we'd happened at a better time.

[Xemyd]

I hate you. I never want to see you, or speak to you again, don't ever try to contact me. You were my very best boyfriend and you hurt me the worst. I wanted to marry you, I would have done everything for you and yet you just tossed me away. Don't even pretend you cared about me. I really hope you're miserable.

[AnyaNova]

Woke up with a heavy heart this morning.

 

I'm ok when I get moving, but my God I MISS YOU and feel that telling you just that might be enough to see you again. No demands, I promise. I just miss your laugh, your smile, how comforting you were. If only we'd happened at a better time.

 

Tell her. Just find a way. If you get rejected it will set your healing back, but it really sounds like maybe there is a shot for you guys. And I think that you're not going to be able to move on until you've tried.

 

There is no hope or help for my situation. Maybe I'm just silly, but I really would like to see you guys work it out. Like a wrong in the world might be corrected.