Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[AnyaNova]

Well.

 

Merry Christmas.

 

I won't text you or call you. But saying it here apparently will be more than you will do for me.

 

I will watch the doctor who Christmas speci tonight.

 

Tomorrow we will have our Christmas dinner, presents, and persimmon pudding.

 

You probably are having your celebration today. If you are surrounded by S's, as I suspect you are and are intrinsically not one, you are probably bored. Probably in a vey comfortable way that you are used to, but stiflingly bored, nonetheless.

 

As much as I sometimes wish you missed me a little, I hope that you miss yourself, that self that until September at least, you had only truly shown me, more. A lot more.

[im_thedude]

A lull in the middle of Christmas day activities, and I'm missing you like all hell. I wish you were a part of my life still

[SimonSerenade]

Merry Christmas, it was actually pretty...alright too, mostly because in the last month or two, I got completely over you, I'm happy alone, just like I always was, relationships just aren't for me right now, especially not with people like you, but I'm not going to get into it, I could care less now, I'm just glad your gone and it's for good, I hope you have a great life, whatever you do with it.

[loveiswar101]

LOL...how many more people are going to tell me I am a wonderful, caring, loving person and you missed out. Yeah I made a few mistakes but I was all in, you have missed out.

 

So why can't I get you out of my mind.

 

Miss you xxx

[love1336x]

whoever she is I hope she making you happy

[kat1012]

F^ck you

at the same time I miss you. I dont know how things gone south when we were together. Maybe it's me reading into things too much, thinking that you dont care anymore, which got the best of me, and start the bickering. but now I've learnt to be a much better person.

If our paths cross again, then we may be back together

if not.....fine. there are other guys out there for me, and I believe one day I will find someone, that make me feel secured.

Oh and I didnt say merry christmas to you. oops, I wasnt drunk, and apparently the only time I would ever THINK of texting you is when i am very drunk.

[ElectricTangerine]

I miss you! I miss cuddling with you so much. I miss the intimacy, your arms around me. They felt so ****ing fantastic. God I miss your arms.

[ElectricTangerine]

I miss your hair. I loved playing with it so much.

[AnyaNova]

You are like a distant fairytale now.

 

Something or someone barely real. Hazy.

 

I know I am tired of chasing the fairy tale. I know that I am damn tired of wishing the fairy tale would get off of his dysfunctional horse with his true self that he hides from nearly everyone and do something.

 

But the thing about fairytales, we all know, is that they aren't real.

 

They aren't true.

 

They never come true.

 

I'm off to go find someone and something real. You were one hell of a load to try to carry. To try and care for.

 

I'm tired of lugging you around, especially, since you don't care for me.

 

I'm setting you down completely this time.

 

There is someone out there that I won't have to carry. That I won't have to expend so much energy in trying to help him work out his very self.

 

I am looking forward to him, because looking backward to you is a pointless waste of my time. You have made that point, abundantly clear.

[loveiswar101]

I know I am tired of chasing the fairy tale.

 

With you AnyaNova

[loveiswar101]

Last few day I have been to hell and back my bunny, holding on for hope.

 

I'm glad I managed to find the courage to drop what I had of yours left back to you today. I honestly couldn't do it myself and grateful for my friend helping me out.

 

But above all i feel cleansed, no healed but cleansed.

 

Best wishes xxx

[seekingpeaceinlove]

The breadcrumbs you were dropping as of late have gotten bigger and bigger. I would say now they're bread chunks.

 

Your texts used to be pretty neutral but now they're getting a bit affectionate. You even dropped your massive ego to say that you missed me.

 

Though these messages have given me some satisfaction (as a dumpee) I acknowledge them for what they are...bread crumbs.

 

You miss the good times, the sex, the love, the laughter, the companionship but you don't want a relationship with me.

 

The feeling, my dear, is mutual.

 

Though my heart is still filled with love for you, I am moving on. I have accepted that we are not compatible and that our relationship existed only for a reason and was not meant for a lifetime. I've learned so much from you, from us, and from myself.

 

I don't regret us. The love, the joy, the pain, the memories...

[L1ght]

You are like a distant fairytale now.

 

Something or someone barely real. Hazy.

 

I know I am tired of chasing the fairy tale. I know that I am damn tired of wishing the fairy tale would get off of his dysfunctional horse with his true self that he hides from nearly everyone and do something.

 

But the thing about fairytales, we all know, is that they aren't real.

 

They aren't true.

 

They never come true.

 

I'm off to go find someone and something real. You were one hell of a load to try to carry. To try and care for.

 

I'm tired of lugging you around, especially, since you don't care for me.

 

I'm setting you down completely this time.

 

There is someone out there that I won't have to carry. That I won't have to expend so much energy in trying to help him work out his very self.

 

I am looking forward to him, because looking backward to you is a pointless waste of my time. You have made that point, abundantly clear.

It is funny how memories seem to fade into a dreams. Its as if actual past events in our lives never even happened.....I guess at the end of the day the only thing that really matters is the here and now.

[AnyaNova]

It is funny how memories seem to fade into a dreams. Its as if actual past events in our lives never even happened.....I guess at the end of the day the only thing that really matters is the here and now.

 

And the possibilities inherent in the future, but I know we already disagree on that point and so I will not press it.

[AnyaNova]

You know, among my presents this year, I have a couple new books. I was going to start with the Milgram essays, but I think perhaps, in light of our relationship, and the many big red glaring flags I missed with my impaired vitamin deficient brain, (a nice example would be my complete inability to even catch the problem with or start to inquire why, at 32 years of age, you sat across from me at the park after announcing that you were okay with dating a liberal, why you exclaimed with a massive air of relief, that you parents were okay with you dating a liberal), but anyway with the events of this summer, fall, and our whole relationship...

 

I think I will start with Sutherland's inquiry into "Irrationality."

 

:

[shorty1988m]

Dear O,

 

When you decided to end this it killed me. You were the first girl i actually loved and the first to break my heart. But time spent away from you has opened my eyes to the sheer amount of red flags you produced.

 

When we were first dating and you had another guy there should have really made me think but you drew me back in. I don't know how and the last few weeks have really made me wonder if i ever did love you or just the idea of you.

 

The amount of times you say one thing and do another is astonishing and the way you turn the blame around onto me and make me feel like a dick for bringing the issues up has really made me doubt myself.

 

I know now we can never be friends. I didnt want to be but i tried because you were such a big part of my life. Maybe now you truly have lose me you will realise what you had. Maybe you wont. But really i just don't care anymore. You never deserved me as a partner and you sure as **** don't deserve me as a friend.

 

You said when we ended this that a LDR would be two hard and you just knew we'd be together again. Well i can tell you now we won't be. If you see me on the street you better cross to the other side because you're invisible to me. I'm moving on and instead of jumping into bed with the first douche that shows me interest i'm going to work on myself for now.

 

I was never a priority for you so i can rest knowing i did all i could to make you happy. I still do want you to be happy because you know what, i'm genuinely, a good ****ing guy.

 

Have a nice life!

 

wish i could actually let her know this stuff but NC speaks louder than i ever could.

[The Situation]

This is getting out of hand now. I can't concentrate on anything. I've looked through most of our archived FB chat and HOW could I have thrown that rapport away. We understood each other perfectly.

 

If I get you back, I never want to leave you ever again. I will be the perfect boyfriend, and hopefully much much more.

 

I'm getting in touch. I fully expect rejection, but I have nothing to lose.

 

I miss you so much and am not prepared to accept it. I want to grow old with you.xx

[AnyaNova]

This is getting out of hand now. I can't concentrate on anything. I've looked through most of our archived FB chat and HOW could I have thrown that rapport away. We understood each other perfectly.

 

If I get you back, I never want to leave you ever again. I will be the perfect boyfriend, and hopefully much much more.

 

I'm getting in touch. I fully expect rejection, but I have nothing to lose.

 

I miss you so much and am not prepared to accept it. I want to grow old with you.xx

 

I hope I find someone as dedicated as you are. And as sure of what he wants.

[loveiswar101]

Well you won, but the war is not over my bunny. After yesterday we have no need to contact each other. You have your things and I thank you for the loan of them.

 

I say you won as I am back in the hole of 6 years back, exactly the same whole. Will I get out of it, who knows. Weird thing is you were different and I originally put you on a pedestal, but even though my love has not waned, you had your faults. But I honestly believed we were good together.

 

The reason I say the war is not over is I have bit the bullet and closed all doors for contact now. I have today seeked professional hep for my depression. I will win the war of my emotions, fears and whatever else is holding me back without you.

 

My heart is huge and maybe sometimes too big.....it only gave and wanted to you.

 

Miss you xxx

[AnyaNova]

So I went back and read the thread I started after you ignored my email about the AvPD. For my own dignity, I won't post how long I secretly hoped that maybe, because I sent it to the email address that you originally used with me, because though I could easily remember the composer plus number formula, I could never remember which server, that since it wasn't your main personal account that maybe you just hadn't seen it yet.

 

But I must remember. As I'm using these weeks of break to let you go and set down the burden of you completely, that when I needed you most, in whatever capacity you were willing to be there in; you ignored me.

 

That is who you are. That is who you chose to be.

 

I have a small arc of posts on this thread planned out, and when break is over, save that last post I told you about, when I have found someone new, I will again enforce myself to not post here anymore.

 

It is somewhat pathetic that I speak to you here as if you were reading these. As if you knew me on here.

 

As if you cared one whit what I think or feel anymore.

 

It is high time I returned the favor. And by the end of break, I hope that I have somehow rewired myself to not care about you any more. To not care that you are choosing to stifle who you really are and the things you want. To not care that you are choosing to me what seems like a living death.

 

This will be the first time that I have had to completely close my heart to someone.

 

It is not altogether a comfortable experience for me

 

But it is, apparently, a necessary one!

Edited December 28, 2013 by AnyaNova
iPhone posting and autocorrect

[StringsAttached]

You dumped me because of religion amongst many other things after the usual bull**** talk about future, kids and a cottage by the lake.

 

And then you get together with someone else because they have '****' listed as their religious beliefs on their dating profile.

 

You settled for less. I love you and wish you best of luck but I hope you get bitten by an anaconda.

[Softie]

Hope you had a rubbish lonely Xmas.

 

I had a great one surrounded by people that love me. Unfortunately you don't have many of those because you won't let anyone in and think it's better not too.

 

Your mad. Even mental for letting me go as your wont ever find someone that would give as much as me when I got so little back, that cared enough to look after you above myself, ignored your bad credit, laziness, the fact your ex still visits your family.

 

It's been 4 weeks NC and 3 months since you cruely for no good reason dumped me, and I'm doing much better. Can't wait to find someone so amazing.

 

See ya, wouldn't want to be ya (defo)

[AnyaNova]

This is getting out of hand now. I can't concentrate on anything. I've looked through most of our archived FB chat and HOW could I have thrown that rapport away. We understood each other perfectly.

 

If I get you back, I never want to leave you ever again. I will be the perfect boyfriend, and hopefully much much more.

 

I'm getting in touch. I fully expect rejection, but I have nothing to lose.

 

I miss you so much and am not prepared to accept it. I want to grow old with you.xx

 

You know, it is so disconcerting how much you sound like my ex. I know that you are not. My name is not Cheri and my ex and I would never have met up in a bar. But it is odd and a little sad how you phrase things so similarly and emphasize things so similarly.

 

But I must admit I'm not even clear on who the Situation is and I'm sure my ex isn't.

 

Don't stop posting your posts to Cheri, here, or anything. they are beautiful and hopefully helpful for you. It is a good exercise for me to read your posts and remind myself that he will never think or write anything like that about me.

 

I must begin looking forward to the future and get my head out of the past.

 

I wish you and Cheri luck. :-)

[AnyaNova]

This must be my mantra.

 

You are not thinking about me.

You are not missing me.

You don't care about me.

 

I must take you at your word. You said, in that last night, that despite all the pain it caused you, you were sure that all you would feel the next day was relief.

 

I must believe that that is truly what you felt.

 

It is my task now, to convince myself that you don't even like me anymore, that perhaps, to facilitate said relief, you have found some way to vilify me in your own mind.

 

Perhaps due to my nutrient related mood crashes you have simply written me off as crazy. Who knows.

 

But I'm setting myself a limit. Now that my mood is stable with the vitamins and I am cognitively all there again, I am making myself be done with you by the end of break.

 

If I get a little blue and start missing someone, I will miss he who is not yet in my life, not you.

 

But you did teach me an important lesson. I thought that in most cases, where love is concerned, that people tended to do the logical thing and be with each other when they both clearly had feelings for each other.

 

You taught me how wrong I was. That I also need to withhold my trust for so much longer.

 

You have taught me to be wary. To be cynical.

Edited December 28, 2013 by AnyaNova

[MoooOinkBaaa]

I'm glad your house warming party sucked. Wonder if you slept with another guy that night? Who cares you're no longer part of my life anyways. Enjoy your miserable alcoholic lifestyle. You're not the high calibre woman I used to know, you're low low calibre.