Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[Njeanne]

*sigh* I changed Rikard, I'm not taking insults anymore. Someone posted on facebook how ugly and fat I am, I told him off. In past I would cry and make you upset with how I felt, but I didn't and never would again! I am who I am now, I grown over these six weeks. I put in my mind a list of things I can't take to heart anymore!

 

People that call me ugly are ugly inside, people that call me fat only care about the outside rather then personality. You liked me for who I am, not how I looked.

 

I am still sorry for the pain I caused you...me doing that hobby, while you were bored and waiting for me on your computer.

 

Please forgive me, I am sorry...

[delighted_delilah]

I haven't told you that we are over. I haven't told you I am going NC. Maybe it's because I know you will either try to talk me out of it, or pretend to care about my feelings, and offer to do whatever it takes to make me happy.

Except you can't. You won't. You haven't made time for me in over a month. You said you loved me, but you never have time for me when I am hurting or simply want to just see you. Amazingly enough though, you have time for me when I agree to send you naked pictures of myself when you are out of town.

You know what?

**** YOU!

You are a manipulative, lying, using prick and I am never, ever debasing myself by allowing you into my heart or bed again.

I have accepted this crappy behaviour from you for over a year now, and frankly, I need this to be over.

 

I just don't think I have the time to actually tell you.

I wonder how long it will take you to notice I am gone.

[Minadee]

This is so hard. I have your words "I love you" ringing in my ears after you called me drunk on saturday night. Trying to decipher what it means is so annoying. Was it nothing? Was it everything? Sigh...

[bitterruin]

I've been trying to avoid running into you. And I haven't yet, other than the other day when I saw you after you went to pick up my stuff. I keep running into your friends though but you're never with them. Where are you?

I know you're still friends with Alexa because she was there Sunday night when I saw you. I'm starting to think you've moved on to another guy and now have no time for your friends, that's why I never run into you.

I've been talking to Max too. He's actually a great guy, no wonder you left me for him. I probably would have done the same with the way things were going.

I've been with people since we broke up, I've been on a couple dates but no one is interesting enough to make me like them. Except for Max. The only guy I like is the only one I shouldn't be seeing.

 

I miss you. I don't need you. I know I can live without you and life will go on and I'll be fine. But there are days I just want to cry because I miss you so much. I wish you'd realize how much I love you, and that no matter how bad our relationship got at one point we're still able to make it work, all we have to do is want to be with each other. I wish you wanted to be with me as badly as I want to be with you. But there's nothing else I can do but sit and wait until the pain goes away. I've lost you for good.

[Njeanne]

In two days it'll be seven week since break up... Every night I dream where it went all wrong, how my hobby kept me busy four evenings a week, so where you drifted apart from me. :'( I quit that hobby ages ago, but i know it's too late. You fell out of love with me, and feelings coming back is impossible right?

 

Those words you told me hurt me so much, but they definitely showed a sign you weren't happy anymore because you felt unloved by me, even though everyday I told you how much you meant too me. Every relationship has their ups and downs, why did ours have to go so down you'd end up leaving me.

 

I would do anything for a second chance Rikard, I mean that. :'(

I miss your voice so much, that strong, manly and sexy voice that gave me warm feeling inside. Your laugh, your smile...

 

We lack the physical bond like any couple because of ldr, but our friendship bond was sooo strong, but that doesn't mean anything right?

 

I wish you could give us a second chance, I know we can sort out your feelings, if issues are resolved that caused it to disappear it'll come back no? I quit the freaking hobby, I'm SORRY!!!!!!

[Minadee]

Dear J

 

I went to the beach with you today. We took our little doggy. I had a wonderful time, whilst you moaned about being cold. Guess you don't have a single drop of cornish blood in you, eh? I took my tights off and relished in the cool ocean breeze whilst you played football with roxy. I caught you looking at me every now and then, but I'm not sure if they were glances of affection or more "what the h*ck is that crazy broad doing prancing around in the sea in JANUARY" but I love it. The sound of the crashing waves and the sand between my toes. I really am a water baby. It was really stoney today and I watched as other crazy beach-goers watched as you helped me across the pebbles. You took a photo of me wrapped up in my big fuzzy pink blanket. It was actually a really beautiful photo of me if I do say so myself. My skin was clear and my hair was everywhere, yet I'm looking straight at you through enormous, sparkling, emerald green eyes. Although shivering, and looking ridiculous in a giant blanket, you could see for the first time in a few months that I was really truley happy. It was a candid shot and I didn't know you were taking it. Infact, I was grumbling that you were constantly checking your phone. I hope you keep that photo of me.

 

It wasnt awkward today. Conversation wasn't flowing like usual though, i'm not sure why. I so wanted to bring up saturday night when you told me you loved me a numerous amount of times on the phone. But i couldnt. I was afraid you'd tell me it meant nothing.

 

I'm sure it's not healthy to cling onto hope like this, but i'd give anything for us to be a family. I guess I just have to be paitent. I feel alright at the moment. I've gone back to bed, as i'm exhausted. I think whatever the outcome of this, today proved that maybe sometime in the future, if you decide you want us to move on, that maybe we can be great friends.

 

I noticed you didn't kiss my cheek today. I can't help but wonder why.

 

But, i'm not dwelling! You have your life, I have mine. I have spent MORE than enough time wondering what you are doing.

 

I'm off for a little ZZZ

I still love you very much.

Edited January 30, 2013 by Minadee

[th90]

Happy birthday. I hope you were waiting for me to text or call you today even though I doubt so. You must be having a blast with the people who changed you and made you felt like you wanted to be single after being committed to me for 7 ****ing years to do all the ****ing worthless things you always wanted to.

 

Tonight no one's gonna tell you to watch your limits on alcohol. No one's gonna tell you not to drive if you got drunk. No one's gonna tell you to take care of yourself. No one's gonna tell you "I love you" and mean it. Sure your friends will tell you they love you, wait till you realize what kinda love that really is.

 

Go ahead and continue ruining your life. I couldn't thank you enough for cheating on me, doing things behind my back, telling me countless lies, making empty promises and assuring me how much you loved me all at the same time. Thanks for breaking my heart you idiot. You can have my eternal gratitude as your birthday gift this year.

[coltsfan1]

Sometimes and this is one of those sometimes.

[Njeanne]

Honey, I miss you so much everytime I go to bed and wake up.

I am healing, getting stronger, but I still miss you so badly.

 

I know I went wrong in doing the hobby and being so busy while you were sitting on your computer waiting for me, you became bored and fell out of love with me. I hope your feelings are still there, please let them be...

 

You told me we were too different when you broke up, which is bull**** in my part because we had many things in common, aside from music/movies. We were happy before I started that hobby, so I assume you said those things because at the time it felt like it was but it isn't...

 

Honey, please give us another chance. I quit that hobby, we can work it out I know we can. You were teaching me your language, you said "one day you'll run in this snow" so I know you saw future with me. You were going to move to study abroad so we could be closer aswell...where did it all go?

 

Rikard, I hope you'll have a change of heart because I know why you fell out of love with me and I know your feelings can be recovered if spend time together. :'(

[Njeanne]

It has been seven weeks since break up.

 

I just wanted to say hope you are doing well, hope you are happy, hope you are healthy and doing fine in Uni. I miss you a lot still, I still feel bad for how things turned out and like I said (and will keep saying) I'll live with this painful guilt for rest of my life. I know one thing quickly changed in our relationship and it made you unhappy, I am sorry, and I will keep saying sorry till I see no more...

 

Promise me to be happy for rest of your life

Promise me to succeed in everthing you wanted to do in your life.

Promise to find a gf who will make you so happy because you deserve it.

Promise me to stay strong and healthy.

 

I will promise to do the same...

[Minadee]

I hate this.

 

Either come home to me, or start a relationship with her, but you cannot have both. You cannot keep leading me on, telling me you love me, telling me how beautiful I am, telling me you want to touch me and then posting comments about how much you miss someone (going to assume this is about Harriet)

 

I think I am slowly reaching the point where I have had enough of being a fall-back plan when things with you and her go wrong. I guess I am just so blinded by the fantasy of wanting to be a family with you and the bub.

 

I'm scared and alone and need you. I hate how much this hurts.

[delighted_delilah]

You're texting... I am not answering. But I want to.

[ladyabstrused]

You're texting... I am not answering. But I want to.

 

I assume you're on NC. Resist the temptation. Do something else to distract yourself.

[delighted_delilah]

I assume you're on NC. Resist the temptation. Do something else to distract yourself.

 

<3 I art journalled and hung out with my kiddos. It worked :-)

[Biscous]

Ha! Breadcrumbs.

 

Wasn't brave enough to risk moving to Texas with me. You ran to your ex and you are miserable with your situation. Sorry. I'm gonna ride this sh*t on my own.

[Minadee]

I am not having a good day

[h3braica]

J,

i hate u so much!

[willinghd]

I love you,

I can't believe you left me for that weird looking old country dude. You lied to me. You told me there was no one else and that you wanted to be alone. You still owe me money. I love you. Please come back to me. Don't ****ing do this. You are everything to me. I can't live without you. I had a fat chick over tonight just to try and satisfy my urges. You are the only one I want. Come home. Come back to the happy place we had together and lets be a team again. I didn't do anything wrong. Ok I got a little insecure when I saw you were talking to him but now you are with him!! How could you do this to me. I busted my ass. I was the hardest working nicest guy you have ever seen. You say your parents hate me. I don't understand why but if you give me a chance to explain to them the situation I am sure they will see it in a different light. I have never spent time with them. Please love me. Just come home, dump this guy and come back to me I am the one you want. I loved you unconditionally and I still do. I am not going to let you see this ever because it would make me appear weak and I am not the weak one. You are. You are weak because when we broke up you said you liked being alone and here you are. With another guy already. Are you kidding me? What am I? Chopped liver? Just because I got super infatuated with you and started talking about marriage is not a good excuse to throw me by the wayside. I love you. Stay. We can work on stuff. We don't have to live together just go out with me every once in a while and let me see the kids too? I love you. Please

[th90]

Somehow I miss you a lot today. I wish we were still together, talking and making each other laugh like we always did.

 

Doesn't help that tomorrow is exactly 3 months since you broke my heart and crushed my spirits :'(

[Harradin]

I still wake up thinking that everything that happened between us since you left was a nightmare. I haven't seen or spoken to you since October, we had the same way of thinking so I wonder sometimes whether you think about me like I think about you. But you haven't tried to make contact with me, it hurts to think that I'm that insignificant in your life now. I find myself wondering what was wrong with our relationship that made you want to leave me for someone else, I can never find a answer, I guess it was the circumstances that surrounded it. I really miss you, I had the best time of my life with you and those memories will never leave me. I have a strange little feeling that our paths will cross again at some point, guess I'll have to wait and see.

[Sari]

Happy Birthday and all that jazz. Hope you have a good day x

[Heartfail]

This is amazing idea... Here goes

 

Hey J. So I think you should know how inconsiderate it was of you to come to my house.

 

You get to wake up today go to work and probably spend the day messaging her.

 

I got to cry all day yesterday I got to have my housemate pissed at me for being upset you came over. I have come to work today exhausted and back at square one.

 

What you need to know though J is i know what a fraud you are. All your caring sharing happy go lucky upbeat let's pretend everything is awesome i want everyone to like me.

 

I have seen the real you and it doesn't even exist you are just an amalgamation of what people want you to be. I know there is a darkness in there really. That's why you have the panic attacks thats why your skin is in such a bad state.

 

You're a baby. You are 28 years old and you still suck your thumb. Was I supposed to find it endearing? It was gross. Especially when you put it in my mouth to suck. it made me feel sick.

 

You have been over mothered your whole life and it's prevented you from becoming a man. Your whole family is one big stepford wives syndrome but I saw the cracks. At least my crazy family are open about our problems we aren't pretending to be anything we're not.

 

So you slept with a 22 year old 3 weeks after me? She got attached and you dumped her? How the hell does that make you any different to all the 'bad guys' you are always talking about and hold yourself in such higher esteem than?? You used a young vulnerable girl to rebound on- round of f'ing applause big guy.

 

I know you and N sit together telling each other how great you both are when actually you're both crazy and just as infallible as the rest of us- she is a stone cold erratic irrational cow and she is in love with you but doesn't want to have you so pretends she is your best friend. I bet she has loved us breaking up so she gets all your attention again. All your support all your surrogate boyfriend bullsh**t.

 

I will get over you. I will find a real man a man with some substance and culture and adventure. You can stay in your little world of reality tv shows, cartoon pyjamas, appalling club nights and now this new girl. From what I can see online she is far too political and far too smart for you my friend- you really think she is going to want to sit around watching crap television you couldn't even let me read an article in the paper without wanting to make some stupid joke or get all the attention.

 

YOu are a nobody I wouldn't have looked twice at you if you hadn't groomed me after the last BF. I'd like to say have a nice life but I can't say I think that at all right now.

[Njeanne]

Wow, I'm amazed! I'm having difficulty crying, really I think I'm past the crying phase. That doesn't mean I don't miss you or want you back, I would like nothing else if we had a second chance together.

 

I still mean I would do anything for us to get a second chance, because I know you falling out is mainly my fault. I learned a lot through these seven weeks, I learned to become stronger.

 

I am still the person you fell in love with, that never changed.

I pray everynight before I go to bed to give us another chance, but I know only you can choose for that too happen. And ldr is very hard, but that never stopped us before, you said you never regretted it because you loved me and nothing was going to change that choice.

 

Rikard...i love you.

[Heartfail]

It's late. I have to go to sleep now and stop thinking of you. I wish I could say goodnight and nestle into your back but I cant she does that for me now.

 

I'm going to be OK though there's more to life than you and wonderful as you are you weren't/arent that great/ We should only have ever been friends xx

[ladyabstrused]

I am not having a good day

 

*hugs*

Feel better soon.