Sk8away Posted April 24, 2007 Posted April 24, 2007 But that wasn't my question at all. Anyone else care to answer if he treats all women this way? ..so many of them allow him to?
Sk8away Posted April 24, 2007 Posted April 24, 2007 Then why do you care? Why are you posting questions -- still? You want something -- you want his interest - you want to "figure it all out" -- whatever it is, you are wasting your time with thinking about him, etc. There are PLENTY of men out there who could make you happy. Focus on the many many many of those. Hey there again, Scarlett! I think Island Girl has offered you some very good advice. Speaking from experience, you'll never "win" with these types. You mentioned in an earlier post that you were "hooked" by his behavior. Getting "hooked" or obsessed is a warning that we are getting involved in a very unhealthy situation. I'm sorry you had to encounter someone like this and I hope you'll protect yourself from his mind games.
lonelybird Posted April 24, 2007 Posted April 24, 2007 I think people use this kind of drama to prove they are better than other women, or I CAN conquer him. No offense, I was there. Rather considering if other women got more attention from him, or does he do this kind of thing to other women as well, shouldn't we conside WHY we allow ourselves into this situation? do we have to PROVE we are better than others? Is our self-esteen built on comparing with other people? Who are we? If "he" loves me, then I am worthy; if "he" doesn't love me, then I am lesser worthy? If he doesn't love me, I WILL MAKE him to love me? Isn't this PRIDE? Nobody can change another human being. we should stop playing godess or god. we cannot make other human being a slave of our own. It is WE who allow others to disrespect us. We shouldn't settle for less.
Trialbyfire Posted April 24, 2007 Posted April 24, 2007 I think people use this kind of drama to prove they are better than other women, or I CAN conquer him. No offense, I was there. Rather considering if other women got more attention from him, or does he do this kind of thing to other women as well, shouldn't we conside WHY we allow ourselves into this situation? do we have to PROVE we are better than others? Is our self-esteen built on comparing with other people? Who are we? If "he" loves me, then I am worthy; if "he" doesn't love me, then I am lesser worthy? If he doesn't love me, I WILL MAKE him to love me? Isn't this PRIDE? Nobody can change another human being. we should stop playing godess or god. we cannot make other human being a slave of our own. It is WE who allow others to disrespect us. We shouldn't settle for less. You are right on with this post lonelybird. Well said.
DanielMadr Posted April 24, 2007 Posted April 24, 2007 I think people use this kind of drama to prove they are better than other women, or I CAN conquer him. No offense, I was there. Rather considering if other women got more attention from him, or does he do this kind of thing to other women as well, shouldn't we conside WHY we allow ourselves into this situation? do we have to PROVE we are better than others? Is our self-esteen built on comparing with other people? Who are we? If "he" loves me, then I am worthy; if "he" doesn't love me, then I am lesser worthy? If he doesn't love me, I WILL MAKE him to love me? Isn't this PRIDE? Nobody can change another human being. we should stop playing godess or god. we cannot make other human being a slave of our own. It is WE who allow others to disrespect us. We shouldn't settle for less. Yeah its called power/ego games. Its not about wanting the other person its about winning the game. Its about social status/hot or not/control/seeking approval. Thats why it seems playing games works. You make the other person interested in winning-not loosing but not in You.
stace79 Posted April 24, 2007 Posted April 24, 2007 Sounds to me like this guy's just an old-fashioned player. Travels a lot for business, probably has some ho in every city...maybe two or three, as you mentioned. Who wants to date someone who's only around once a month or so? At least the one guy who was like that was honest with me about it...that he was just traveling for business and wanted "some fun" while he was out. A hot young girl to "show him around a new place." C'mon....open your eyes.
Author sweetscarlet Posted April 25, 2007 Author Posted April 25, 2007 ..so many of them allow him to? I think maybe he misleads them.
Author sweetscarlet Posted April 25, 2007 Author Posted April 25, 2007 Hey there again, Scarlett! I think Island Girl has offered you some very good advice. Speaking from experience, you'll never "win" with these types. You mentioned in an earlier post that you were "hooked" by his behavior. Getting "hooked" or obsessed is a warning that we are getting involved in a very unhealthy situation. I'm sorry you had to encounter someone like this and I hope you'll protect yourself from his mind games. I totally agree with you sk8away and I also appreciate how you word things as well. I never disagreed with the points you're making.
Author sweetscarlet Posted April 25, 2007 Author Posted April 25, 2007 I think people use this kind of drama to prove they are better than other women, or I CAN conquer him. No offense, I was there. Rather considering if other women got more attention from him, or does he do this kind of thing to other women as well, shouldn't we conside WHY we allow ourselves into this situation? do we have to PROVE we are better than others? Is our self-esteen built on comparing with other people? Who are we? If "he" loves me, then I am worthy; if "he" doesn't love me, then I am lesser worthy? If he doesn't love me, I WILL MAKE him to love me? Isn't this PRIDE? Nobody can change another human being. we should stop playing godess or god. we cannot make other human being a slave of our own. It is WE who allow others to disrespect us. We shouldn't settle for less. All good points of which I was already aware of and yet, I still wondered those things.
Teddy and Jane Posted April 25, 2007 Posted April 25, 2007 Matter if fact, yes he's done a lot of that. In fact, so are several other men showing interest too. In fact, I've been telling several of them I'm busy. And these are intelligent professionals too. Sorry to disappoint you....lol. TJ, I really hope you start to be a happier person. You sound like a very bitter woman. I'm very happy. You're the one obsessed with a guy who is showing no interest. Just because you are not hearing the answers you WANT to hear, don't get all accusatory of others. I'm doing great, thanks, I have a healthy attitude where if a guy is going out with all these other women, I'm not going out with him. I'm sorry you don't have that healthy attitude and continue to obsess over a guy who you haven't even kissed and who took another woman on a vacation he had talked about taking you on. Can't say I've ever had a guy do that to me. Honestly, I don't think you've ever been in a relationship where the guy was really loving and committed toward you or you would understand right away that this guy you post about is not really that into you and doesn't really care about you. None of the behavior you described is that of a guy who really cares and wants a loving relationship with you.
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