Kwo-ne'-she Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 Reading so many of the threads here, and it gets a bit confusing. I'm curious, did you know your MM/MW was still married and in a "committed" R when you got involved with them? My story has been posted here, bits and pieces. Basically, I "knew" he was "married, but seperated & getting a divorce" when I became involved with him. This is what he told me, and what I believed to be true. When the entire truth came out (he still lived with his W, and had made no real plans to divorce her), I ended up walking away eventually. I should have left immediately, but I was weak. It took about 3 months for me to completely cut him out of my life. So, I'm curious. Did you know your MM or MW was married and living a lie? Or were you fooled into believing they were either seperated, divorced, or even single?
Jinxx Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 Yes. We both were married. He is XMM now. I am separated from my husband.
sapphire0903 Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 He and I were both separated for one year (living apart from spouses) when we met. We dated about a year, then things began to change. He began seeing W more frequently, with the family ect. eventually I became the OW. Now I am divorced and the exOW we have been in NC for 1 week now. (We were in NC for 6 weeks, then he called me)
oyster Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 He and I were both separated for one year (living apart from spouses) when we met. We dated about a year, then things began to change. He began seeing W more frequently, with the family ect. eventually I became the OW. Now I am divorced and the exOW we have been in NC for 1 week now. (We were in NC for 6 weeks, then he called me) so I guess, living apart is not a real seperation. could it had been like a trial run to see if they could live without each other existence and when the going went though, he went back to known territorry (W)?
rdnkgrl31 Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 Yes, I knew my MM was married. He has never lied to me about it.
sapphire0903 Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 so I guess, living apart is not a real seperation. could it had been like a trial run to see if they could live without each other existence and when the going went though, he went back to known territorry (W)? When we met, he was planning a divorce (had not filed due to a foster child situation, him and wife were caretaker....long story) I was told there was "no way" he was going back to her.............he tells me he still does not know how she was able to be back in his bed. I don't feel he lied to me, life, plans, things, they all change, this situation was no exception.......
Kenzo Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 I didn't know he was married until after the first time we hung out...I knew him for 6 months prior, casually, as a customer, never a ring or talk of a W or family. Once he told me, I was just plain stupid to allow all of this to continue. He never lied about it, he brought it up, I never would have known.
GreenEyedLady Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 So' date=' I'm curious. Did you know your MM or MW was married and living a lie? Or were you fooled into believing they were either seperated, divorced, or even single?[/quote'] I did not know...he told me he was divorced...and he didn't have constraints like MM often do, so I believed he was telling the truth...
Guest Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 The basic feelings were already in place before he said he was married (we had lunch, discussed working on a project together, had long hugs). But after I found out, I tried to pull back and the rest is history. It has been since August but we have not had sex.
Freedom Now Posted April 20, 2007 Posted April 20, 2007 I didn't know either. He told me he was divorced. And he sure acted it like it too. Guess it helped that he lived in another state and traveled for a living...
torranceshipman Posted April 20, 2007 Posted April 20, 2007 Mine wasnt married but had a long term partner - he said that he had decided for definite that he wanted to end the R with her (he'd talked about doing so for a long time before we were involved) - and that he had to just wait until after the wedding of very close friends of theirs before doing it (as he was best man, she was bridesmaid, didnt want to rock the boat before the big day and cause unnecessary drama etc) - I understood that, but what a surprise, that was just an excuse! Thank God I ditched him!!!
Author Kwo-ne'-she Posted April 20, 2007 Author Posted April 20, 2007 I didn't know either. He told me he was divorced. And he sure acted it like it too. Guess it helped that he lived in another state and traveled for a living... Mine too. *sigh*
woe_is_me Posted April 20, 2007 Posted April 20, 2007 yes *sigh* i knew .. it was convenient at the time i wasn't looking for anything serious... famous last words there...
Recommended Posts