Guest Posted April 15, 2007 Posted April 15, 2007 Please someone help me understand this. I talked to MM wed and he said he want me to be for the long haul and he dosen't know how things will work in his home( they are having rough times) I was trying to break up. Thursday I call him and he said he we should break up and never to talk again.Initially I wanted to break up but after he said that I panic and started begging not to end the affair. I convince him to call me back saturday because it was my birthday. He called all loving send me a love poem. I told him that we should cool and be just friends but avoid hurting each other. He agreed that he cannot have a double life and he wants to see how his situation at home will be before he can decide about us. I agreed with it. Than he drove 1 hour away from his house risking losing his job and being caught by his w.( she knows about me but think it is over) just to show how much he cares for me. We decide we going to wait and see how things are going to be.We decided to continue the affair. Today I am again thinking of calling him and ending it. What tha heck are we doing? , can someone give me some insight, we have being doing this breaking up and making up for months now and it is very painfull and I don't understamnd why we are doing it. Does any one have any idea why we are hurting each other?
car2007 Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 You think he's the one, but he's not sure about you. You should talk about that with him. You won't know what to do unless you have an honest discussion with him. If you feel he is not being honest with you, break it off. You have to know yourself; can you tell if he's stringing you along?
scaredinlove Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 For what I read in the posting here and from my own situation ,this breaking up and making up seem very commom in affairs. Maybe you guys should try NC just to clear your minds. Good Luck!
GreenEyedLady Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 Initially I wanted to break up but after he said that I panic and started begging not to end the affair. I convince him to call me back saturday because it was my birthday. You need to STOP this right now...Don't EVER beg...and he should call you on your birthday without you having to convince him to do that... You're hurting each other because you are in a highly stressful situation and you have strong feelings for one another...you need to take a step back and decide what you want...and what you're willing to settle for...
NoIDidn't Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 You need to STOP this right now...Don't EVER beg...and he should call you on your birthday without you having to convince him to do that... You're hurting each other because you are in a highly stressful situation and you have strong feelings for one another...you need to take a step back and decide what you want...and what you're willing to settle for... I totally agree with GEL. You are doing a very destructive, dysfunctional dance. The back and forth. The indecision. All of it will hurt EVERYONE involved moreso than the original A. Go NC to clear your head. Get your stress level down. Ask him to respect your need for NC so that you can come to a decision that you can stick with.
sadbuttrue Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 you seem very indecisive about what you want. it is not easy being with a MM, and if you are unsure you even want to be with him, i would definitely recommend ending this charade.
Guest Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 you seem very indecisive about what you want. it is not easy being with a MM, and if you are unsure you even want to be with him, i would definitely recommend ending this charade. I am very indecisive ,and so is him. I think that is the cause.WE love each other but we don't know what to do with the situation. How do you do NC It seems impossible not to talk to him.
Guest Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 What tha heck are we doing? , can someone give me some insight, we have being doing this breaking up and making up for months now and it is very painfull and I don't understamnd why we are doing it. Does any one have any idea why we are hurting each other? I'm not expert, but I am in the same situation, more or less than you. I'm a guy by the way. We call it our "circles". We call things off but end up right back were we started like we were in the twighlight zone. It sucks...and is wonderful. I think begging is not a good idea ever. I think he has to make the decision for himself and you need to tell him how you feel. You need to make a decision to break away. Either he follows or not. You can not go on being pulled by the string he is relying on. He may have the same feelings for you but he is in a different situation and that may be all the difference. The ball is in his court, but you have to retain your self respect. This will either get you want you want or not. There is NO OTHER WAY. Do what you have to do. The world is not always the perfect place so be ready to accept that.
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