Author sweetscarlet Posted April 18, 2007 Author Posted April 18, 2007 OP, you are searching for top of the creme. Make sure you have something to offer:eek: Excuse me, but myself is enough to offer, thank you.
Author sweetscarlet Posted April 18, 2007 Author Posted April 18, 2007 Actually I want to settle down and have kids and always wanted it. But not with anybody. She has to close the backdoors by closing hers for example. Its not about when but with whom. And Im sure you are the same way as me, that you dont like to be stripped of your freedom. Nobody likes it. Only when you are tired, frustrated and lazy you want to be locked at home. Dont you think? Sounds like you'll be a great catch for someone. Honey, I married you because I was tired, frustrated and lazy so I allowed you to lock me down at home. I know I'D want to come home to that attitude....... You have a long way to go, my friend. And the sooner you get there, the better off you'll be. But...I didn't listen to older people when I was younger and neither will you....but I still had to say it....
Curmudgeon Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 And Im sure you are the same way as me, that you dont like to be stripped of your freedom. Nobody likes it. Only when you are tired, frustrated and lazy you want to be locked at home. Dont you think? I haven't been stripped of my freedom at all (been married to the love of my life for going on 11 years). I chose wisely and married a delightfully independent woman who doesn't want to change me, loves me as I am and has never tried to clip my wings in any way. She hasn't had to because I clipped them myself, knowingly and willingly, by committing to her. Where do you get "locked at home?" I can "walk" any time I choose. I simply choose not to. My home is enhanced by my wife, as is my life.
Touche Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 I have to agree with Curmedgeon. He described how it is for my H and I as well. It's sad. You have kind of a twisted view of what a good marriage is supposed to be. Where do you think you got that view?
DanielMadr Posted April 18, 2007 Posted April 18, 2007 Sounds like you'll be a great catch for someone. Honey, I married you because I was tired, frustrated and lazy so I allowed you to lock me down at home. I know I'D want to come home to that attitude....... You have a long way to go, my friend. And the sooner you get there, the better off you'll be. But...I didn't listen to older people when I was younger and neither will you....but I still had to say it.... Your not understanding my post makes me thing that you have some biased view on men. Or it can be I wrote it wrong or you read it out of context. Which is: Why are girls going for Jerks? B/c they are not so attached to them. They still has their freedom. Guys are the same. Nobody wants to stripped of their freedom, especially not when they are young. Maybe only when they are frustrated, lazy, tired........they want to be locked home. Got it?
Author sweetscarlet Posted April 19, 2007 Author Posted April 19, 2007 Your not understanding my post makes me thing that you have some biased view on men. Or it can be I wrote it wrong or you read it out of context. Which is: Why are girls going for Jerks? B/c they are not so attached to them. They still has their freedom. Guys are the same. I'm not sure how you got that I have a biased view of men by what I said. I think that women go for jerks not because they're jerks and not because they don't become attached. I think it's other qualities in jerks that women like...such as confidence, cockiness, boldness, flirtatiousness, charm, they're unafraid to disagree with/stand up to a woman, outgoingness and the fact that they tend to be involved in exciting activities. Some independence is good in a guy, but not to the extent that you're talking about. I disagree that women seek out the jerks because women want their independence. I think they seek them out for the qualities that I mentioned. Ideally women would like a man with the above qualities who was NOT a jerk. I think that a lot of women can't find them so they settle or hope that they can change the jerks once they are with them. Nobody wants to stripped of their freedom, especially not when they are young. Maybe only when they are frustrated, lazy, tired........they want to be locked home. Still here you are showing a distorted view of relationships. Many do not see them this way. Many do not see relationships as being stripped of their freedom or being "locked at home". The fact that you use those terms speaks volumes about how you feel about relationships and I recommend that you stick to casual dating until you work this out. This tells me that you have a long way to go before you are ready for a relationship. Partly this can be due to your age. I'm not sure how old you are but even if you are very young, it is still an extreme view to have and therefore, I do not think that your view is based upon your age alone. I hope that you take the time to figure this out about yourself instead of blindly going from relationship to relationship never getting to the root of the problems. It will save you both time and heartache if you do.
DanielMadr Posted April 19, 2007 Posted April 19, 2007 I'm not sure how you got that I have a biased view of men by what I said. I think that women go for jerks not because they're jerks and not because they don't become attached. I think it's other qualities in jerks that women like...such as confidence, cockiness, boldness, flirtatiousness, charm, they're unafraid to disagree with/stand up to a woman, outgoingness and the fact that they tend to be involved in exciting activities. Some independence is good in a guy, but not to the extent that you're talking about. I disagree that women seek out the jerks because women want their independence. I think they seek them out for the qualities that I mentioned. Ideally women would like a man with the above qualities who was NOT a jerk. I think that a lot of women can't find them so they settle or hope that they can change the jerks once they are with them. It is true.... But in your explanation are missing qualities like integrity, loyalty and other qualities important for long term relationship. So girls go for jerks b/c they want to have fun not kids. Once girls want to settle down, ready to give up some of their freedom, they give higher priority to other traits. Do you know what I mean? Still here you are showing a distorted view of relationships. Many do not see them this way. Many do not see relationships as being stripped of their freedom or being "locked at home". The fact that you use those terms speaks volumes about how you feel about relationships and I recommend that you stick to casual dating until you work this out. I use sound terms. Btw that "locked at home" was used as an extreme of what can feel depressed, bored, lazy people....they'd like to be locked at home. I hate casual dating. The term sounds disgusting. whats that btw? This tells me that you have a long way to go before you are ready for a relationship. Partly this can be due to your age. I'm not sure how old you are but even if you are very young, it is still an extreme view to have and therefore, I do not think that your view is based upon your age alone. I hope that you take the time to figure this out about yourself instead of blindly going from relationship to relationship never getting to the root of the problems. It will save you both time and heartache if you do. Thank you very much. You are wrong about me hopefuly. Its not about my age its b/c Im reckless bad moth@f@cka, actually. Please dont try to patronize me/humiliate me. Some "people" try this on me all the time and its counter-productive. By entering a relationship you loose some of your freedom. Its a fact. By having kids you loose even more freedom. Its a fact too. I dont understand why are you so afraid to admit that. It has nothing to do if I or You or anybody else is ready to give up their freedom.
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