Cardinal64 Posted April 15, 2007 Posted April 15, 2007 Hi. As I indicated in my previous posts - its been over 3 months since splitting with my wife of 7 years - almost 8 1/2 years together - we have a 6 year old son. When she told me before the split that she wanted her "freedom" - that really hit hard. I had never been the controlling type of husband - so it was like a slap in the face. Little did I know she was "hooking" up with a young guy. But the signs were there when I look back: Dressing up to very sexy when she went out/even to work , never leaving her cellphone lying around, ending calls abruptly when I entered the room - then saying oh it was so-and-so to cover her tracks- I could go on and on. What a fool I was. But I will get past this. I deserve better. Anybody else gotten the "I want my freedom" speech too? Cardinal64
LucreziaBorgia Posted April 15, 2007 Posted April 15, 2007 Ah yes, the old "freedom" speech. It is right up there with "I need time" and "I need space". What they fail to leave out is the second part... "I want my freedom to be with someone else." "I need time away from you so I can spend it with someone else." "I need space because I intend to fill it with someone else." Nine times out of ten, that is how it is. Sorry to hear about your situation.
aaaaaiiiiieeeee Posted April 15, 2007 Posted April 15, 2007 I got an interesting variation, "It's your fault I've been working every weekend! I want my life back boo hoo!" Ok yeah it's all my fault, don't take any personal responsibility. Then to find out the guy had bought her a cell phone and she calls me a liar, tells me she doesn't like my morals...WTF!?!?
LakesideDream Posted April 15, 2007 Posted April 15, 2007 After a years reading on LS, and my own "experiance" at the end of a 25 year marriage, I get a real chuckle at "I need space", "I need freedom", "I want to find out if I can do it on my own (my ex's version)", "I need time", and all the other variations on the theme. In reality, ninety five times out of a hundred those phases are code for "I've found a new life support system for a penis that interests me, I'll be leaving now". Of course you can switch gender and genitalia to male with the same results. However.. men just call it quits more often, giving no rational reason. Time, space, etc. are used in the hopes that the BS will hang on long enough to remain a usefull "back up" while test riding the new thing.
Author Cardinal64 Posted April 16, 2007 Author Posted April 16, 2007 Thats what I thought all along. She wanted her freedom to get banged by some other guy more like it. And if one day she gets tired of screwing her brains out with this guy - she probably believes I'll be right there waiting her. NOT GONNA HAPPEN!!
Salicious Crumb Posted April 16, 2007 Posted April 16, 2007 Hi. As I indicated in my previous posts - its been over 3 months since splitting with my wife of 7 years - almost 8 1/2 years together - we have a 6 year old son. When she told me before the split that she wanted her "freedom" - that really hit hard. I had never been the controlling type of husband - so it was like a slap in the face. Little did I know she was "hooking" up with a young guy. Actually...good...be glad it was a young guy. Because in the few years to come....she won't be looking so good anymore and he'll be looking to replace her with someone less wrinkly. What comes around goes around.
mrmaximum Posted April 16, 2007 Posted April 16, 2007 Actually...good...be glad it was a young guy. Because in the few years to come....she won't be looking so good anymore and he'll be looking to replace her with someone less wrinkly. What comes around goes around. So so true, and us guys are into appearances like that so this is very possible!! AND the fact that we don't handle cheaters too well so he is most likely just using her for now. Probably won't end well.
Salicious Crumb Posted April 16, 2007 Posted April 16, 2007 So so true, and us guys are into appearances like that so this is very possible!! Well, it doesn't have much to do with appearances as it has to do with you don't want to be boinking someone that reminds you of your grandmother. ACKKK!!!!!!!
whichwayisup Posted April 16, 2007 Posted April 16, 2007 Well, it doesn't have much to do with appearances as it has to do with you don't want to be boinking someone that reminds you of your grandmother. Serious question, but do most men think this way, and lose visual interest and sexual interest in their wives as they age and get older themselves? Or are you just referring to a younger man, older woman situation?
mrmaximum Posted April 17, 2007 Posted April 17, 2007 Well, it doesn't have much to do with appearances as it has to do with you don't want to be boinking someone that reminds you of your grandmother. ACKKK!!!!!!! TOO TRUE!! LOL
Salicious Crumb Posted April 17, 2007 Posted April 17, 2007 Serious question, but do most men think this way, and lose visual interest and sexual interest in their wives as they age and get older themselves? Or are you just referring to a younger man, older woman situation? Just referring to the young and old situation.
mopar crazy Posted April 17, 2007 Posted April 17, 2007 Nope, never got that from my WH. His excuse for wanting out of the M was b/c we fought all the time but in reality, his xOW was the reason for wanting out of the M. If our M was so bad he would of wanted to leave way b4 the xOW came into the picture. Sorry you are dealing w/ this. It's hard, very hard.
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