matthewpowder Posted April 12, 2007 Posted April 12, 2007 Okay; so-- I didn't know if this belonged in coping or not, so I decided to play it safe and post here. I... admit that I am a jealous person. I've done a lot of maturing, but I still feel tinges of it every now and then. It has kept me from relationships before, but after a long stint of being single and personal growth-- I finally knew what I want, and that special person finally came into my life. Nearly everything I could want. But, frankly, they used to be a slut. A big, big... big slut. Now... sex is something I revere as highly special. I know that some people view it as recreational, but it will always mean more to me. And, now that they want to be with me, I'm not sure how to get over their past. I know I should, and that it's the right thing to do. I know it's only a mind set, but it's there and I can't seem to shake it. It's almost like it can never feel special to me between them. It feels almost unfair. Like while I was out working hard in my past, they got to indulge themselves in all their carnal desires. I tried looking for some guides or articles, but I couldn't find anything truly helpful. Does anyone have any advice?
whichwayisup Posted April 12, 2007 Posted April 12, 2007 It feels almost unfair. Like while I was out working hard in my past, they got to indulge themselves in all their carnal desires. This is very distorted thinking, and quite sexiest too. I mean, to put that label, a slut on someone you love because you cannot deal with their sexual past is YOUR problem, not hers. And, how the heck can you assume that her past is less than yours. To say that you worked harder, and imply she didn't, is selfish of you. Learn to control your jealously, your issues and hang-ups about her past. If you can't do it on your own, seek therapy, because (don't mean to sound harsh) you sound very arrogant and think you're above it all. A woman, just like a man, can have sexual experiences and NOT be a slut. Who she is now is because of her past - IN out OUT of bed.
Author matthewpowder Posted April 12, 2007 Author Posted April 12, 2007 This is very distorted thinking, and quite sexiest too. I mean, to put that label, a slut on someone you love because you cannot deal with their sexual past is YOUR problem, not hers. And, how the heck can you assume that her past is less than yours. To say that you worked harder, and imply she didn't, is selfish of you. Learn to control your jealously, your issues and hang-ups about her past. If you can't do it on your own, seek therapy, because (don't mean to sound harsh) you sound very arrogant and think you're above it all. A woman, just like a man, can have sexual experiences and NOT be a slut. Who she is now is because of her past - IN out OUT of bed. It's a he, not a her. And I was asking for how other people handled their jealousy, not have people tell me that's what I need to do. I know that's what I need to do, I want to know how other people did it. And even though I may be wrong, that doesn't make my feelings magically go away-- no matter how bad I feel or how rude you are.
whichwayisup Posted April 12, 2007 Posted April 12, 2007 I didn't mean to come off as rude, that wasn't my intention. Sure, I was harsh but maybe you need to re-read your own post and know that you come off very offensive. You didn't specify if it was a he/she, I assumed she because of your username. Sorry.
lonelybird Posted April 12, 2007 Posted April 12, 2007 Past is past. As long as he loves you, AND don't compare you with his extremely sexy exes, doesn't it fine? maybe he is a changed man now?
Recommended Posts