MattNZ Posted April 4, 2007 Posted April 4, 2007 Hey guys, Been reading a few of these threads for the past few days to get some comparisons into my situation. Just after a bit of advice: My girlfriend and I have been together for just under 2 years. We have been living together for about 90% of that time! She has been suffering from depression for the past few months which has been tough but I have been right by her side throughout the whole ordeal. Recently, the depression has started to lift and she is socialising more and is also able to drink without getting upset. This has been our goal from when the depression was diagnosed - to get her through it and back to herself. A couple of weeks ago, she said to me that it is almost as if she has just woken up and found herself in a long term serious relationship (we have a cat too - her choice) and now doesn't know what she wants. This came as a huge shock as I thought she was happy with the way we were going. After a yoyo period, we discussed the situation and her moving out was suggested as a way of giving us space and seeing what we both want. At first I was mortified but that is because I was focussing on the negatives of it all. Now I focus on the positives of it and I get excited at the chance of 'rekindling' the romance. We have been very intense since we got together and haven't really done much for ourselves - we've put everything into the relationship. She moved out officially yesterday after a 'grey' period of 2 weeks where we didn't know what was happening. Now that is behind us, we can both look after and develop ourselves and look forward to spending quality time together - as opposed to just down time at home. However, now here's where it gets hard! I am finding it so hard to take this step back. I know that I have to to make this work and give it a shot but I'm just so used to seeing her everyday morning and night. Today for example, work is very quiet and I would normally pop to see her at the restaurant she manages but I have to hold back. I know she needs space but I guess it is habit after 2 years!! Can anyone help or has anyone been in similar situations where they have had to just chill out a bit from being used to seeing someone all the time? Thanks Matt in New Zealand
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