forever12 Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 I was just recently dumped by my fiance of 3 years. I've made some mistakes in the past, and those mistakes made me relieze how much I really do love him. Now all of a sudden he wasnts "Space". Well ok, I can understand that and respect that, but he dumped me so horrables, had no clue it was coming, and he won't talk to me about it. Plus I live with him, and he was the money supply while i was in school. I don't care about the money, or a place to stay. He is being kind enough to still help me till i can support myself, and hes goin to pay to get my car fixed. How can i give him space he needs with me living there? I know most guys aren't that great with the talkin about feelings, but still. He says he still loves me, he said so. What am i to do? I want him back, but i don't want to be pushy. Someone Please help me. I'm so lost and confused.
EC Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 He said 'space' thats it? no reason? Is there anywhere you can stay for a while so he can have some space at his house?
Author forever12 Posted April 3, 2007 Author Posted April 3, 2007 i mean i could..but i would have to quit my job, i don't have NO money, nothing. not even a car...hes my ride to work...i don't want to be clingy or needy..but i don't want to be with out a job either...
EC Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 Maybe thats why he needs his space? Because you do need all of these things? A lot of the problems I had with my bf in the begining were because I was too dependant. I didn't have a car, I wasn't going to school, I was making minimum wage. I could tell he was so tired of doing basically everything for me. It was too much PRESSURE for him. I finally got my act together and things are 100x better. Could that be it?
Author forever12 Posted April 3, 2007 Author Posted April 3, 2007 yea, but he was in my shoes last year...he depended on me for everything...and instead of doin what hes doin, i cheated, which i hate...and so i know thats it...hes said he didn't want to be depeneded on..but right now i have to ..others wise i'm on the street...just wish i had somewhere to go ya know?
EC Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 I know exactly how you feel. It sucks that when he was in your shoes you cheated though lol Maybe thats what hes doing now? But if hes so quick to need space when your going through a financial 'bump' in life thats something to think about. What about your parents or a friends house?
Author forever12 Posted April 3, 2007 Author Posted April 3, 2007 parents don't want me to come hom,,and siblings,,they all have more problems then me...friends..the only ones i have, are his to..and so i'm lost...i'm tryin everything...yea it sucks i cheated...but i was so overwhelmed by have to work all thetime while he sat at home on his ass..and i know how he feels..so do...but i atleast work and go to school, and i do all the chores around the house..still...i still wash his cloths, get his cloths ready fo rthe next day, clean thebath room, bedd room, just out of habit..i wanna stop doin all this for him, but i don't want him to get the idea that i don't care enough to still do it...he thanks me for doin it..and i reply with thinking " its my job"...i just can't comprehend the fact that we arn't together anymore.
CaliGuy Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 I was just recently dumped by my fiance of 3 years. I've made some mistakes in the past, and those mistakes made me relieze how much I really do love him. Now all of a sudden he wasnts "Space". Well ok, I can understand that and respect that, but he dumped me so horrables, had no clue it was coming, and he won't talk to me about it. Plus I live with him, and he was the money supply while i was in school. I don't care about the money, or a place to stay. He is being kind enough to still help me till i can support myself, and hes goin to pay to get my car fixed. How can i give him space he needs with me living there? I know most guys aren't that great with the talkin about feelings, but still. He says he still loves me, he said so. What am i to do? I want him back, but i don't want to be pushy. Someone Please help me. I'm so lost and confused. It's hard to give him space. I would spend as much time away from the house as you can and only sleep there. As soon as you are up, get out of the house. Spend time with friends, hobbies, school, work, the gym, etc. There are many things you can do to fill up your spare time. If you really want him back, act indifferent. Act like you are happy with his decision and you are moving on. Fake it till you make it, they say. Don't ever let him see you sweat, breakdown, cry or otherwise get emotional. It's most often when our ex's believe we have truly moved on without them that they either come back or they leave us for good. What you need is to make sure he's not on the fence dragging you along while he lives the high life. Live your life. Be happy, enjoy life and don't show him that you need him. Ever. It's hard in your position but you can do it.
Author forever12 Posted April 3, 2007 Author Posted April 3, 2007 Thanks good advice...its sounds good in my head..then we i see him..to pick me up from or something...i melt...like right now i feel like i can do it..but then once hesaround me i fall to peices...cuz i know if i want him back i need to give him what he needs...but then when i have the chance i fall apart...its crazie..its like theres 2 of me..lol
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