Seen_It_All Posted April 8, 2007 Posted April 8, 2007 Cupcake, I don't even understand what you're possibly getting from this long distance trainwreck. There's just NOTHING positive about it at all. I'm kind of surprised this guy hasn't just cut the strings and let it go. He sure doesn't sound like he's getting much from it, either. To be honest, from the way you describe this relationship, your existence in this guy's life sounds more like an annoyance or a chore to him - definitely not a bonus or someone that completes his life. And he doesn't pretend that you DO. Hey, it is what it is. It's really time to just take this thing off life support and give it the burial it deserves, don't you think?
Author Cupcake Posted April 10, 2007 Author Posted April 10, 2007 Cupcake, I don't even understand what you're possibly getting from this long distance trainwreck. There's just NOTHING positive about it at all. I'm kind of surprised this guy hasn't just cut the strings and let it go. He sure doesn't sound like he's getting much from it, either. To be honest, from the way you describe this relationship, your existence in this guy's life sounds more like an annoyance or a chore to him - definitely not a bonus or someone that completes his life. I realized lately that the only stories I have told my friends about him are negative. Actually, I don't have any good stories to tell. Even the cruise we took last year was plagued with negativaty because he was preoccupied and anxious to get back home. Somebody kept calling his cell phone like 10 times a day, probably more. He finally turned it off at sea. But as soon as he turned it back on at the end of the week, there were 29 messages. And the phone began ringing again, immediately. He told me it was clients from work, and co-workers calling him. And he never answered the calls or checked the messages in front of me. I had 5 messages from friends and family all wishing me a safe and happy trip. I returned a few of my calls in front of him while we were waiting for our flight at the airport. We had a lot of idle time to waste. I thought he would follow my lead and check his messages, or at least answer his phone that continued to ring while I was on my phone. But he didn't. The reason we are together, he always tells me how much he loves our "sex." He said I'm the best lover he ever had. At times, he complaines about other women and how everything was perfect with his XGF's, except the sex. For him, sex is the most important part of a relationship. If the sex isn't good, then nothing else matters to him. He said I am the whole package. Currently, the only problem he says we have is the distance. So I don't know why we aren't working together to solve that problem. When I really think about the whole situation, I see how it's possible for me to be the best GF he ever had. I give my all this relationship. But he isn't the best BF I've ever had. Even the other guys who cheated on me never treated me like I was a problem when asked a question. No other man has ever accused me of being insecure, eventhough they cheated on me. Unfortunately, walking away from this LDR is harder than it seems. Since I canceled the trip last week, my BF suspects that I lied about being sick. Now he's angry with me. He called me Thursday evening and I was out with friends. He accused me of being with another guy. My friends even told him that I wasn't with a guy. He didn't belive them. He has called me several times since then, but I haven't answered. My friends told me not to answer his calls anymore. I should not speak to him again. I should disappear without giving him reason's because he should already know the reasons. But now, he's leaving messages asking me why I'm not answering the phone. He is demanding a reason why I'm ignoring his calls. He wants to know what's going on. I don't want to talk to him. I don't want to tell him the reasons because I know he will blame everything on me. I just can't handle this any other way. Maybe I'm a coward. But I can't face him anymore.
kribby Posted April 10, 2007 Posted April 10, 2007 Honestly, whatever freakin' works. If disappearing *works* then freakin' disappear! Though I am sure somone is gonna say it is childish-- but why not.
LucreziaBorgia Posted April 10, 2007 Posted April 10, 2007 He accused me of being with another guy. Another classic cheater move. Even the cruise we took last year was plagued with negativaty because he was preoccupied and anxious to get back home. Somebody kept calling his cell phone like 10 times a day, probably more. And he never answered the calls or checked the messages in front of me. He's been doing this for over a year!? I should disappear without giving him reason's because he should already know the reasons. Honestly, you are doing the best thing by cutting him off and moving on. It sounds like you are stuck in a pattern with these types of guys, and I can guarantee you that you never break a pattern by remaining in one. Currently, the only problem he says we have is the distance. So I don't know why we aren't working together to solve that problem. Because distance works for him. It allows him to cheat on you and get away with it easier.
SoleMate Posted April 12, 2007 Posted April 12, 2007 ...the only problem he says we have is the distance... Yeah. And you've got 20 concerned strangers here telling you that the problem is his lies and cheating, plus your obliviousness to it. Who are you going to believe? The calls during the cruise gave his game away over a year ago. 29 calls, phone ringing off the hook, he won't answer it in front of you and says it's "coworkers"!!!???? Give me a break! Those are some pretty persistent coworkers! Actually, you don't need to believe us. Just listen carefully to what your brain is trying to tell you. There's a reason you posted here...something was nagging at you....and it's not that you have "Trust issues", you've just gotten temporarily messed up with a cheating lout.
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