LoveLace Posted April 2, 2007 Posted April 2, 2007 So I started chatting with a cute guy from this Personals site last week sometime; I quickly suggested a phone conversation because it's just better to hear their voice and their personality that way, etc...chatting just doesn't do anything for me as far as becoming more interested. Anyway, after an hour long conv., he seemed funny, fun, smart, nice, whatever. Before hanging up I made sure he had my phone # but he hasn't called since. One day I IM'd him to say I enjoyed our chat, and he said he did to. I said gimmee a call sometime. But he hasn't. Yesterday he caught me online and asked what I was up to, etc. He asked, "were you at a concert last night?" I said, "no, why do you ask?". He responds by saying he was at a concert where he thought he saw a girl that looked like me (pics on my profile). I responded by saying no, it wasn't me, then joked that I look better in person than the pics anyway. Then he mentioned the club he was at, which is near his neighborhood, but I wrote back and said, "that's weird! cuz I was right across the street from there last night, at 'The Bar'", which I was. Then he disappeared! I was saying "hello? are you there?" and nothing. He did mention that he was getting ready to go somewhere, but why would he just ditch the conversation like that? It was almost creepy that he was apparently across the street from me Sat. night, AND apparently saw a look-alike of me...then I freaked because over the phone I think I told him the name of my apt. complex. He knows I live with a guy though. So this chat was yesterday, and he hasn't done anything since. Am I being paranoid? Did I say something really silly in the chat?
sunshinegirl Posted April 2, 2007 Posted April 2, 2007 Am I being paranoid? Yes. Maybe he's not a phone guy. Maybe he really did have to leave quickly, and didn't have time to say a proper goodbye on chat. Maybe he's just not interested. (sorry) Maybe he's stalking you. But I sort of doubt it. I would probably lay low and wait for him to contact you again. In the meantime, is there anybody else you've 'met' online that seems interesting? (That's half the fun of online dating...meeting lots of different people...)
Author LoveLace Posted April 2, 2007 Author Posted April 2, 2007 Yea now that I think about it I was just paranoid. He probably just wanted to know if I was the girl he saw and nothing more. I haven't attempted to contact him at all though. Since being on the site this time, he's the only cute/interesting one I've found so far. I send messages to a lot of cute guys but the only ones that send me messages are pretty unattractive. I've never had great luck with dating this way though... anyway thanks!
oppath Posted April 2, 2007 Posted April 2, 2007 Since being on the site this time, he's the only cute/interesting one I've found so far. I send messages to a lot of cute guys but the only ones that send me messages are pretty unattractive. I've never had great luck with dating this way though... anyway thanks! I have this problem too. The girls who contact me are usually not in my league. It's bush to say but it is true. It's part of online dating. I personally don't want to use the phone for anything other than planning a date. Most men feel this way. When we ask for a phone number, it is because we've already decided we are interested enough to meet (or to just stoke our ego's). Men rarely want to talk for an hour with a strange woman on the phone. You might need to compromise on this a little.
Leoni Posted April 2, 2007 Posted April 2, 2007 In the initial pursuit, men like to be the hunter. Let him pursue you.
DanielMadr Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 In the initial pursuit, men like to be the hunter. Let him pursue you. B.S. We love to hunt deer not women. And when we are hungry we want it dead and frying fast. Good hunter does no pursue btw. How can you compare hunt for deer with "hunt" for woman? It gives no sense at all.
Citizen Erased Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 B.S. We love to hunt deer not women. And when we are hungry we want it dead and frying fast. Good hunter does no pursue btw. How can you compare hunt for deer with "hunt" for woman? It gives no sense at all. :lmao:
oppath Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 Agreed. I like some green lights, or at least yellows so I can step on the gas before having to stop. I don't like the chase. I like the push-pull. I want the woman to demonstrate to me that she warrants my attention.
Author LoveLace Posted April 3, 2007 Author Posted April 3, 2007 Well come to find out his computer just broke down while we were chatting, he sent me a message to call him yesterday, so I did, and now we have a date for Thursday! We'll see how it goes!
Art_Critic Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 Well come to find out his computer just broke down while we were chatting, keep your eyes open... his computer just didn't happen to break while chatting with you.. how gullible does he think you are ?.. I say... he is a Player !!!
Author LoveLace Posted April 3, 2007 Author Posted April 3, 2007 It's too soon to say if your right Artcritic; He sounded pretty sincere when he said that he wanted to call me after that but he didn't have my #. As soon as he could get back online he typed an IM to call him and he was apologizing like crazy, etc,...give the guy a break, I don't even know him well enough to judge him that harshly this soon. We'll see how the date goes. I think I'll have a better idea of what he's like in person.
luvtoto Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 His wife may have walked in the room, and he had to log off pronto!
ruby_gloom Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 He sounded pretty sincere when he said that he wanted to call me after that but he didn't have my #. I thought you said you had previously made sure he had your number. Did he lose it or something? Because if you called him and he has caller ID (and your number is not blocked, of course), then he should be able to retrieve your number from his phone, unless he had a bunch of calls in between then and now that made your number get erased or he erased it himself. Anyway, that and the computer crash sounds kinda fishy, imo. Although, if it helps any, I'll be the first to admit that sometimes my PC crashes/freezes/acts stupid right in the middle of important things. This has happened to me a few times while chatting with friends, and it makes it seem like I just ditched them, when in fact I just had to shut down and restart in order to be able to get back online. So, it does happen. And maybe he did get got enough calls to push your number out from his (phone) memory. Or mayne he wrote it down somewhere and misplaced it/lost it/forgot about it. Maybe he did have those troubles and was being sincere. Maybe.
Art_Critic Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 His wife may have walked in the room, and he had to log off pronto! Bingo......... or GF... or another girl that he was hitting on was requiring most of his chat time... LoveLace.. I'm not saying that he is a bad guy.. just a player.. That is why I said keep your eyes open..
Porn_Guy Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 online dating is a total waste of time and money for most people
Author LoveLace Posted April 3, 2007 Author Posted April 3, 2007 I thought you said you had previously made sure he had your number. So, it does happen. And maybe he did get got enough calls to push your number out from his (phone) memory. Or mayne he wrote it down somewhere and misplaced it/lost it/forgot about it. Maybe he did have those troubles and was being sincere. Maybe. This is exactly what he told me...he did have my number in caller ID the 1st time we talked, but several days went by, he did say the reason he couldn't call was because his other phone calls pushed my number out of memory. I didn't think for a second that he was lying, and usually I'm pretty suspicious of things like this. If he wasn't interested I don't think he'd IM me and tell him to call right away, and then ask me out when I did call. In fact he actually wanted to meet that same day but I wasn't able.
Author LoveLace Posted April 3, 2007 Author Posted April 3, 2007 Bingo......... or GF... or another girl that he was hitting on was requiring most of his chat time... LoveLace.. I'm not saying that he is a bad guy.. just a player.. That is why I said keep your eyes open.. Well I always keep my eyes open for players, nothing has to happen to make me do that...the fact that he's a guy alone is enough to keep my eyes open... But I barely know the guy so I don't have a reason to think he was lying about being kicked offline, it happens to people all the time, and big deal that he didn't take down my # the 1st time. He asked me out and we're going out Thursday. If his behavior is peculiar after that, then I might label him a player; but for now he's just a nice guy that I'm going on a date with. The online incident is too minor of a thing for me to start judging him as anything but that. I was suspicious when I started this thread just because I try to be cautious with online people, like anyone should be, so I was just questioning weather or not he could be a stalker! Of course, he STILL could be, but again I can't really judge until I've been dating him!
luvtoto Posted April 3, 2007 Posted April 3, 2007 Well I always keep my eyes open for players, nothing has to happen to make me do that...the fact that he's a guy alone is enough to keep my eyes open... But I barely know the guy so I don't have a reason to think he was lying about being kicked offline, it happens to people all the time, and big deal that he didn't take down my # the 1st time. He asked me out and we're going out Thursday. If his behavior is peculiar after that, then I might label him a player; but for now he's just a nice guy that I'm going on a date with. The online incident is too minor of a thing for me to start judging him as anything but that. I was suspicious when I started this thread just because I try to be cautious with online people, like anyone should be, so I was just questioning weather or not he could be a stalker! Of course, he STILL could be, but again I can't really judge until I've been dating him! Just remember to listen to your gut. Got a bad feeling...don't ignore it.
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