unsafe Posted March 29, 2007 Posted March 29, 2007 I've been with my boyfriend for 11 months now. When we first met we were roommates. I moved in with him and his brother and his brothers fiance. That four some in the end didn't work out to well. Not because of him and I. But because of the others. Its a long story and I won't get into that here. Anyway I left the place and moved in with my mom. And a couple months later he moved out and now is sharing a house with a guy(roommate). I spend 5 to 6 nights out of the week over there with him. When we lived together before I would mention living together and he said he wanted to, just not yet because it was soon. We had separate bedrooms before so we lived together but we had out own space to go to. He has mentioned having me move into the house he lives in now if his roommate ever moves out. Then about a couple of weeks ago he mentioned if his roommate moved out he would want to get a cheaper place with me. But my boyfriend is inexperienced. I'm his first real girlfriend. And he is 29 years old. I'm assuming he is a little scared since he hasn't really been in a serious relationship before to make that move. How can I make it easier and less terrifying for him. And should I ask him to move in with him? Or should I wait for him to ask? What if that roommate never moves out? Maybe I should wait and if nothing happens then say something?
fluffy0 Posted March 29, 2007 Posted March 29, 2007 In my opinion one of the worst things you can do in a relationship is move in with someone when you guys aren't sure about where the relationship is going. if you are planning to get married or if you aren't into marriage then you see yourself spending the rest of your life together and he feels the same way, then thats different. But if you wnt to move in together just to save money or for whatever other reason, I would think twice. When you live together with your loved one, you build a life together. It is extremelely painful to later find out that they weren't even that serious about you yet and you're not "the one" for them after all. Especially since you are his first girlfriend, you should really be careful. Most people end up not remaining with their first love because they want to test the waters more. I wouldn't move in with him until he starts talking marriage or including you in his long-term future plans. You guys haven't even made it through 1 year yet! A bit early IMHO. I can understand if you are sick of living with your mom because I would feel the same way, but get an apartment with a roomate or a studio for yourself , and wait a little.
Mr. Lucky Posted March 30, 2007 Posted March 30, 2007 In my opinion one of the worst things you can do in a relationship is move in with someone when you guys aren't sure about where the relationship is going. Good advice. The financial and convenience aspects of living together are the least important parts of the decision. Work on your relationship first... Mr. Lucky
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