sweetsexylove Posted March 28, 2007 Posted March 28, 2007 Im not trying to be dramatic here, but the only guy I've ever loved just told me his girlfriend is pregnant. This guy was my husband of 5 years, who became my exhusband a month ago. Complicated ****..but long story short we still loved eachother and now I have to let go because he is going to marry her and do the best he can at being a father. I want so badly for that to be me. I always wanted to know if a child would make him responsible and change...now i know I my answer. There is an emptiness in my soul but also freedom. I don't know how to feel.
LakesideDream Posted March 28, 2007 Posted March 28, 2007 What were the causes of the divorce? Perhaps you needed "space" to "find yourself"? Or... was it the other way around? No fault divorce has made dissolving a marriage a mere formality. Was that what happened in your marriage? What's done is done. Thats what divorce is all about, officially "moving on". He just moved quicker than you.
Author sweetsexylove Posted March 29, 2007 Author Posted March 29, 2007 wow that last part was harsh.....but your right I "needed space". I was sheltered and when I discovered what was in the world I freaked....I knew I hadn't experienced anything. Im not solely blaming my upbringing, I know it was just all a part of it:the growing up and realizing Im not the same person I was when I was 19. We took ownership of a small restaurant and with it came a lot of stress for both of us. There was little fighting, mainly lack of communication then it turned into an in/out of town separation for 8 months, followed by reuniting for 6 months, then in/town separation for 6 months. I moved away to try and start a new life. I filed for a divorce when he told me he had a girlfriend. So, as far as him moving on quicker than me .. your right, but after an 11 year relationship/friendship I am being forced out of his life.
Ssheena Posted March 29, 2007 Posted March 29, 2007 If it's any consolation, you don't know if a child is going to make him responsible and change cause the baby hasn't been born yet and you have yet to see how he will act. It very well could be he stays the same ol <whatever>. Gosh, you must still be so young! I'm guessing around 24? Maybe it is time to hit the trail and lit out for someplace new and exciting - Austin is a fun town if you want to stay in TX. Look at it this way, you do have your freedom, you are young, you can go and do anything you want without being saddled down with a baby or a husband! Time for some deep introspection... what do you want to do that you have never done? If you work in the restaurant business you can go anywhere you want and work... Hawaii, Boston, Seattle, LA...on a cruise ship even. See the world! You have your wings my dear... now where do you want to go???? btw, I do know it's got to feel like a knife in the heart to hear he/see him moving on but believe me, I bet in 2 years maximum, you will think you are very lucky to be out of the marriage. Let me live vicariously through you.... go girl!
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