Guest Posted March 27, 2007 Posted March 27, 2007 My question is I have been maintaining N/C for over two weeks, never heard from her no joke emails or anything and then today bam two joke emails and a small note saying hello and that she didn't know if I was talking to her anymore So should I answer back or keep the N/C going? She says she wants to be friends and I am thinking this is her way of showing that. However, I am not in any position to be friends yet as I still care about her. So do I ignore her and maintain the N/C or answer back hello or wait for a bit.....I don't know what to do as someday I would like to be friends and I really don't want to risk losing that opportunity Advice please.........
stace79 Posted March 28, 2007 Posted March 28, 2007 Don't reply. If you do, you will just be sitting on pins and needles waiting for her to write you back. If she decides she wants you back and if she really DESERVES you, she will let you know and work hard to win you back. Otherwise you should wait until you feel like you can be friends, which might not be ever honestly.
soulseeker Posted March 28, 2007 Posted March 28, 2007 You have to know what you want first, I think. If you ignore her reply, she may just email you again in another two weeks to see if you are ready then. You could just take the ball in your court and respond that you are not ready for friendship yet, but you will contact her if/when you are. I just wanted to point out that a no-response approach could bring more contact from her, when you do have a chance to prevent that. That's why I think it is important to figure out what you really want out of any kind of contact with her. Are you holding on or truly trying to move on?
Guest Posted March 28, 2007 Posted March 28, 2007 You have to know what you want first, I think. If you ignore her reply, she may just email you again in another two weeks to see if you are ready then. You could just take the ball in your court and respond that you are not ready for friendship yet, but you will contact her if/when you are. I just wanted to point out that a no-response approach could bring more contact from her, when you do have a chance to prevent that. That's why I think it is important to figure out what you really want out of any kind of contact with her. Are you holding on or truly trying to move on? I am so confused she emails me ....so I decided to call her and of course, no response so I guess really what I am getting out of all of this is nothing. I feel like she is just playing with me to see if I am still interested. You see the thing is we live 8 hours away from each other so a friendship I figure is better than nothing. However, maybe it will cause me more grief in the long run. I just miss talking with her that's all. She told me she wanted to be friends and if I ever needed to talk to her she would be there. But that doesn't seem to be the case as when I do call she doesn't pick up or return my call. So as hard as this may seem I believe you are right with the N/C as I really don't believe she meant .....she really wanted to be friends...probably was just trying not to hurt me as bad....I don't know but all of this really hurts.... Why is it that one day someone loves you and the next day they don't
2ndIINone Posted March 28, 2007 Posted March 28, 2007 Stace79~ wooooow.... look at you go.... some good advice there. You're learning. Of course, I'm torn... soulseeker is right too... there is a chance NC will bring another contact from her. Now here is my advice. She's fishing. Plain and simple. Keep this in mind. Shes looking to fill an ego. Hers. Not yours, hers. But, there is a good chance she will try to fill YOUR ego first, hoping to get a reaction out of you ONLY to fill her needs. This will happen when you don't respond. In fact, she doesn't deserve a response right now. If she REALLY wants to know how you are doing??? Then nothing will stop her. So give it a lil' while...
stace79 Posted March 29, 2007 Posted March 29, 2007 I should know, I'm going through almost the exact same thing. I'm just giving the advice I wish that I myself could follow. Stace79~ wooooow.... look at you go.... some good advice there. You're learning.
2ndIINone Posted March 29, 2007 Posted March 29, 2007 I'm just giving the advice I wish that I myself could follow. following your own advice is the hardest thing ever. Easy to give advice and see the truth from an outside perspective, but... hard as hell to follow your own advice.
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