emmaUK Posted March 26, 2007 Posted March 26, 2007 i had a knock on the door earlier and it was a guy who lives 4 doors down (i dont really know him that well but i say hi to his GF when i see her) he asked me if im single and i said "kind of.. im still cut up about me ex" and then he was saying his GF's brother really really fancies me but he is to shy to come over and talk to me. the convo went on for abotu 1 minute n i just felt really pressured n then in a moment of being put on the spot i wrote down my number to give to this guy. then he walks over and he is soooo not my type at all.. i didnt fancy him 1 little bit and when he spoke i could tell instantly that he wasnt what i go for... not being nasty or a total b***c but he seemd a little slow and a bit dim. i really wish i hadnt given him mu number now, i dont know what to say i dont wanna casue any problems with the people in this area as i only moved here recently and i dont really know anyone and i dont wanna seem liek a cow who leads guys on an the people in this area are kinda the sort that take things to heart n get offended very easily so im worried now he jsut text me saying "this is my number, thanks for giving me yours" i do not know wot 2 do or say, i am not very good at letting people down. i feel sick any ideas??
TheSwordfish Posted March 26, 2007 Posted March 26, 2007 I understan your feelings. but hey, not evrey guy can be like me so you will have to ditch him Text him you are not interested, or just don't call him. No problem, eh?
Author emmaUK Posted March 26, 2007 Author Posted March 26, 2007 if his sister didnt live 4 doors down then i jsut wouldnt respond but im gonna have the neighbours on my case about it now. when he was at my door she came there 2 plus about 3 othe ppl all being nosey to find out if he got my nubmer or not. i do not want any trouble round here n 2 make enemies with my neighbours i jsut felt so pressured and i am propa propa angry with myself that i didnt think quicker and say that i was most probably gonna be gettin back with my ex
PussInHeels Posted March 26, 2007 Posted March 26, 2007 I'm awful at these things as well, but I've learned that the best thing to do in this situation is to just be upfront and honest about your lack of interest in a polite manner. It's hard, and there's no guarantee he won't be at least a little offended, but I think it's better than avoiding him and refusing to pick up the phone, or going on a date with him to be nice and then telling him afterwards you're not interested. Because I hate rejecting people, what I would do is tell him I'm not interested in dating or whatever, but he seems nice/interesting/insightful/whatever, and I hope to see him around, and perhaps we can talk or do something in a platonic setting. However, this is probably a poor way of handling the situation and I would advise you not inviting any more social interactions unless you really would like to talk with him again. Many guys who are only interested in a date will take the hint, but some can see this as a possible loophole in your previous "I'm not interested" statement. Good luck!
Ruby Posted March 26, 2007 Posted March 26, 2007 Hey you have the perfect out ..... You already told him you are cut up about your ex - Tell your neighbour you feel bad but you should not have given your number as you are nowhere close to dating again as you are so heartbroken. Turn it and say you feel bad as he seems nice but you are just too upset to date for a long time! Good luck lol
TheSwordfish Posted March 27, 2007 Posted March 27, 2007 I don't agree. Be honest instead. You don't have to be hard on him but you should make clear you aren't intersted in any way. The lame excuses will only end you up with him hanging around as a "friend" or him not getting the point.
alphamale Posted March 27, 2007 Posted March 27, 2007 i do not know wot 2 do or say, i am not very good at letting people down. i feel sick any ideas?? yes eUK....tell him you just broke up with your bad boy ex and still are not ready to date anyone emotionally, mentally, or physically. don't forget to say you ex was very jelous type and was 6 foot 3" and weighed more than 15 stone
DanielMadr Posted March 27, 2007 Posted March 27, 2007 yes eUK....tell him you just broke up with your bad boy ex and still are not ready to date anyone emotionally, mentally, or physically. don't forget to say you ex was very jelous type and was 6 foot 3" and weighed more than 15 stone At this century its better to say he is a lawyer. Everything goes to the hell from the time duels were forbidden. Any useless monkey feels like he can bump into you and get away with it.
Author emmaUK Posted March 27, 2007 Author Posted March 27, 2007 i text him this morning saying "hi hope your ok, i wanna be honest with you, i gave u my number coz i was really flattered and you seem kool but im wondeing if i should have now as i split with my ex only 6 weeks ago and i still lveo him so dont wanna lead any one on or mess any one around. im not saying i dont want to talk to you at all but i jsut dont want to lead you on when i dont know what i want right now" he didnt text for ages the ntext back. Hi Emma, im ok thanks, its ok i understand, it must be hard for you" totaly not the reply i was expecting, i am so releived.. was quite sweet of him really.
kevcapone Posted May 4, 2007 Posted May 4, 2007 emma, in a previous post you said that you use to be a stripper before you had your daughter. i need your opinion on this one. was at a strip club over the weekend for a bachelor party and got along real well with one stripper. talked with her at the club for about an hour when she could have gone home. at the end of the night she gave me her real name and number. i called her this week and the number she gave was real but she did not pick up. i left her a message so she would know who called her but she has not returned my call. my question is, why would a stripper give me her real number but not pick up my calls or return them. i've only called her twice by the way. thanks in advance.
kevcapone Posted May 8, 2007 Posted May 8, 2007 emma, glad things worked out for you. i have a question for you since you said in another post before that you use to be a stripper. i was at a strip club a couple weeks ago for a bachelor party and got along with one of the strippers real well. didn't spend too much money on her, about $200 at the most, but she did spend lots of time with me just talking. at the end of the night she had told me her real name and she gave me her phone number when i asked for it. i called her twice since then and left a message once but she has not returned my call. my question is, why would she give me her real number but not return my calls? if she didn't want to be mean she could have just fake numbered me right? just wanted your opinion on this. thanks.
D-Lish Posted May 8, 2007 Posted May 8, 2007 the bottom line is that if someone doesn't call you back after you've called more than once- they aren't interested.... regardless of the motivation behind her handing out her number in the first place. Just let it go....and don't take it personally.
D-Lish Posted May 8, 2007 Posted May 8, 2007 Emma, I've learned that the best way to deal with unwanted attention is to say "sorry- I am not interested"... right from the get go. I've led men on without meaning to because I didn't want to hurt them by being blunt. BUT- as a result of this... I've been badgered and stalked and even lost out on dating someone I actually liked because his friend hit on me and I told him I'd be friends with him.... but now this guy has staked a "claim" on me and his friend has backed off as a result. So- it's best to be honest... it avoids any problems and heartache for you. It's hard to do, because you feel like you are being mean... but it will save you from going through this again. ;-)
sweetbutcheeky Posted May 8, 2007 Posted May 8, 2007 Ok so you can't take it back. But the fact remains that your not over your ex with is the truth. So if you say that you thought you were ready to date but your still not over your ex and am sorry that it's not the right time for you. Then you are honest, no one can be mad and you can get out of a bad situation. Good luck!
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